Right koeeoaddi. Welcome to the Valley 
Now try to get into Scribble’s Cities.
Yay…er, wahoo! Koee is happy. Thrilled. Yet never smiles.
Cities, huh? 
Okay, I think I get it.
Dave Barry is regarded as a humourist there, but Gene Weingarten is not.
And I would not be welcomed into the valley.
…right?
Dave Barry would certainly be there. And I’m afraid that you wouldn’t be.
Though, they have recently run out of beer so if you were to bring some by I’m sure they’d let you in.
I am astounded, or rather I should say apalled at the amount of time it took me to get this (though the light had appeared well before this page). And sadly, I am not allowed in the valley. Which is probably just as well, for there is neither truth nor beauty in the valley, despite the number of alluring enchantresses that will communicate with stunning forthrightness. And you can marry, seek fulfillment in your career, or simply breed offspring. Because, fortunately, nookie is allowed. But no foreplay.
Watcher, seeing as I am allowed in the valley, if you really need a hint, let me know. I won’t be able to email you, but I will be able to send you a message. BTW, you would not be able to have a revelation in the valley, but you could have a bombshell dropped on you.
Pebs (who just got it)
There are masses of balloons for the kiddies - but they cannot be round. Tonnes of smoothies - but no shakes. No ice cream - but you can have a fresh apple!
Brad Pitt is a denizen of the valley - and for that, I am there!
Susan (would not be in the valley)
Let me correct myself (allowed, even permitted! in the valley) - Brad Pitt is not a denizen - he is a dwellor.
Susan
Everyone in the valley watches Wheel of Fortune; Vanna White is very popular, but no one has heard of Pat Sajak.
Everyone watches Chuck Woolery on Love Connection and Greed, but they care not so much for Lingo.
Russian Roulette is popular, but its host Mark Wahlberg is not. Kennedy is liked, but no one watches Friend of Foe. Both Press Your Luck and Whammy are well liked, but Cram and Wintuition not so much.
This is all surprising, since no one in the valley has Gameshow Network, even though they all have satellite dishes!
Everyone in the valley watches Wheel of Fortune; Vanna White is very popular, but no one has heard of Pat Sajak.
Everyone watches Chuck Woolery on Love Connection and Greed, but they care not so much for Lingo.
Russian Roulette is popular, but its host Mark Wahlberg is not. Kennedy is liked, but no one watches Friend of Foe. Both Press Your Luck and Whammy are well liked, but Cram and Wintuition not so much.
This is all surprising, since no one in the valley has Gameshow Network, even though they all have satellite dishes!
Well, time of night wasn’t a factor - I have no more clue at 8:24pm than I did in the midnight hour. And my worst fear now is that if and when I do ever figure it out, I’ll feel even more like an idiot than I do now.
This is like one of those dreams where everyone else in the class read the book, but you didn’t even know about the assignment. Yikes!
Watcher if you would like a hint for this feel free to e-mail me and I’ll help point you in the right direction.
Don’t feel to badly about having trouble getting it though, the first time I ever played this game it took me a few days as well.
Interestingly enough Watcher, the book will be there, so will the class, but there will be no students. You’ll still have to do the assignment but never the homework. Does that clarify at all?
Thanks for being so kind about it Meros. I mean, this is probably the kind of thing your kid sister can figure out in five minutes. Jeesh. I’ll give it a couple more days, and then if I’m still pulling my hair out, I may email you. That is if I haven’t thrown my computer out the window by then. If it does come to that, I may have to offer to buy you a cheesesteak in return for the hint. I’m so dense I can’t believe it.
And whatever you do, please don’t tell me whether or not they have cheesesteaks in this godforsaken valley!
Is there pie? Please tell me there’s pie.
There is apple pie, and cherry pie, but no peach pie or banana cream pie. There is also cheesecake, but no tarts.
Take from this what you will Watcher. There’s would be no Philadelphia in the Valley but there would be a Philly.
George Bush would not be allowed in, but Bill Clinton would be welcomed? Right?
Right.
Of course, politics of any kind are unknown in the Valley. From what I have heard they have a pretty healthy interest in them over in the nearby Cities of Avalon though.
Colin Powell and Condoleeza Rice can come to the Valley. Rush Limbaugh may not.