I just got these in my email from an (otherwise) intelligent woman friend. No matter HOW many times I’ve directed her to both here and Scopes, she insists on sending me this stuff.
That said, some of these are pretty damn funny. And yes, I know that Cecil covered some of them in the books.
Why is it considered necessary to nail down the lid of a coffin?
Why does the sun lighten our hair, but darken our skin?
Why can’t women put on mascara with their mouth closed?
Why doesn’t glue stick to the inside of the bottle?
Why don’t you ever see the headline “Psychic Wins Lottery”?
Why is “abbreviated” such a long word?
Why is a boxing ring square?
Why is it called lipstick if you can still move your lips?
Why is it that doctors call what they do “practice”?
Why is it that rain drops but snow falls?
Why is it that when you’re driving and looking for an address, you turn down the volume on the radio? (THAT IS SO TRUE!!)
Why is lemon juice made with artificial flavor, and dishwashing liquid made with real lemons?
Why is the man who invests all your money called a broker?
Why is the third hand on the watch called a second hand?
Why is the time of day with the slowest traffic called rush hour?
Why is the word dictionary in the dictionary?
Why isn’t there a special name for the tops of your feet?
Why isn’t there mouse-flavored cat food?
You know that little indestructible black box that is used on planes?
Why can’t they make the whole plane out of the same substance?
Can fat people go skinny-dipping?
Why do you need a driver’s license to buy liquor when you can’t drink and drive?