Hey, here’s an idea: since no Moderator has stepped in yet to say anything, perhaps they have missed this thread, and someone should send a mail off…? It is clear that Teelo not only doesn’t understand how he has offended nearly all, but doesn’t give a flying fuck about it.
I would do it, but I’m tired of being the person to “tattle” all the time. So I would suggest that the offended party either mail a Mod with a complaint, or drop it. Because nothing positive will be gained by continuing to try to “force” a person on a message Board to apologize - we all know Monty’s not a sock-user, so continuing to harp on Teelo is not going to do any good.
Apparantly, honor means nothing to Teelo, and he has somehow grown up with the idea that you should accuse people of something, and then have them prove they are innocent. I can only hope it’s his peer group and TV that has inculcated this into him, and not his parents.
Anthracite: Sorry to annoy you, but I have things to do other in the day besides post here, like most of you. (Sorry, but when I wake up at 7 in the morning, I don’t come here) I was busy out helping my family put up a fence, not on the computer. Then after a few hours of hard work came and took a nap. THEN I came here.
Because someone is not posting right when you want them too doesn’t mean I don’t care. I do give a “flying fuck” about this. I think about this alot. It really bothers me that I have annoyed so many people. And to them I apologize.
And why would you say things like, honor means nothing to me? That “I grow up with the idea that you should accuse people of something, and then prove they are innocent.”??
I’d like to point out that I am NOT like this, and if you got to know me besides text messages I am not like how you think I am, and now what every passerbyer on the board now thinks of me. You will not find anyone as loyal as me. I don’t falsly accuse people of things without some sort of idea as to what Is going on.
AND it is not my parents or my peers or our beloved T.V.
I learn these things from life. All 3 have been good to me.
Monty: As I said before I have thought about this, alot.
Seeing as you truly state you are not a sock puppet I believe you, and I apologize for saying you were one. I was wrong.
I also apologize for implying you were a liar.
I apologize for implying you were a racist.
I do however think you are an asshole.
I e-mailed you to level with you, stop the arguing and clear this up. All you had to do was say a simple “yes” but you decided to post it for everyone to see and embarrass me. People like you are so vile and rude. I was going to make this a private apology but as everyone knows, you would just post it anyway and make an idiot of me again. That shows what kind of person you are. You manipulated me and everyone else, and you wanted everyone to see me apologize to you so you can have the final laugh, to show who really is better than the other.
If I had e-mailed it to you, you would of posted it and saught out any error just to get on my bad side again. Don’t deny it, you would. We already see you are capable of doing so.
To everyone: I find it very so incredibly strange that calling someone as non insulting as a “sock puppet” can cause so much arguing and Slicky calling me stereotypical names like: “Sahib, dot-head” etc" can not. No one ever said, “Wow I think you should apologize to Teelo” No, that was too far. But damnit I should apologize if someone takes on another identity. Which is harmless.
To this logic, we can assume that relating someone, to being one with different colored skin, who was then slaved and given poor living conditions. (A nigger) Is not half as bad as someone taking another identity on the internet.(a sock puppet)
You people need to get your priorites sorted out.
If I called someone “purple” in the most insulting way possible, I would bet that after a year or so of this, it would hurt people to be called “purple”
Being accused of a sock puppet was, IS something so minorly small of an insult that it has built up over the years into something horrible, It really isn’t. Step back and look at it. ITS harmless, and if anyone disagres…your purple.
You didn’t have to say any of this, and its pretty insulting that you imply that unlike all of us “you have more important things to do”. If you do, then do them, and don’t hang around an Internet message Board. You are not making friends here with implications like that, and if you thought I would let it stand, you are incorrect.
Oh, and I do other things. Like work 60 hours a week, travel back and forth to England on a regular commute, take graduate classes at night, write a serial book (with an Indian protagonist) and erotica, work on a Recipe and Wine Review freeware program which has got a lot of people interested, own and maintain a house, do all of the chores, read about 1-2 books a week, etc. Oh, and run and administer my own damn Board, with 300+ Members.
So I too have “other things to do.” And I do them too.
The exchange went back and forth for some time.
This is all you really needed to say.
Well, Teelo, it does get into an odd situation here. So let me say something in your defense that will make a lot of people angry.
You see…there is a large contingent on the SDMB that feels the Pit is the place to do whatever you want, say whatever you want, and be as rude, crass, assholic, filthy, and disrespectful as you possibly can be. Sometimes even normally intelligent, urbane posters come here and act like enormous assholes. And, this forum is a prime feeding ground for the 5000-post count trolls, who spend most of their time here attacking people, their only contribution to most other areas of the Board being a rolleyes smiley and a simpering “Oh! The irony!”
And for whatever reason, this is the way the Pit is. It has become acceptable to a large group of people - or even mandated, under the false guise of “free speech” - that you can act like an asshole in any manner possible - but not break the Board Rules.
It’s a problem here, IMO, but I really don’t like talking about it. It’s the way things are here, and I live with it as part of posting here. On other Boards, there are other rules. On my own uber-strict and uber-enforced “sickly-sweet” nice Board, your original post would have generated a strong official warning, and Slicky’s comments would have generated an instantaneous ban for him, and a complaint letter to his ISP. And if his post would have been actual hate speech, a letter from my lawyer to his ISP.
Different Board, different Rules.
Anyhow. This is one reason for the disconnect between people calling for you to apologize to Monty, and many not calling for Slicky to apologize to you - because using offensive and over-the-top gratuitous insults is not only “OK” but expected, while breaking Board rules or going against the precedent of past stated wishes of the Moderators is not “OK”.
Another reason people did not jump to your defense is, to be brutally honest to you - you’re nobody. Many people only defend their friends, and not the random stranger or newbie that comes by. Seeing two newbies fight really means nothing to most people. This Board is so huge and so fast-moving, with so many new people registering each day, that it takes a while before anyone generates an emotional investment from long-term Members here. Neither of you have been around long enough to make the general populace care.
Sometimes people don’t want to get involved out of caution. The reason I did not get involved, quite frankly, is it was hard to tell which of you two was acting like the bigger ass, and which of you was going to be around for more than a few days. Yes, that is harsh of me, and wrong. If you show you are a decent poster, and you are wronged, then I will go to the mat for you, whether you have 10 posts or 10,000. But your continued foot-dragging on the sock issue made me question whether you were “worth it”.
However, whether or not you were “worth it”, I still should have defended you against Slicky’s written attacks here.
The above is my opinion only - I’m sure someone will be here to contradict something I’ve said.
I am sorry that I and others let you hang out there largely on your own. Stick around and participate to the other areas of the Board some, and see if you can learn, teach others, and make some friends. Or, here’s a thought - perhaps you should re-phrase your original post in a more critical manner, a less “Pit-like” manner, and repost it to Great Debates in the form of a Great Debate, on India and Indian culture. In that way, I feel you will be exposed much more to more thoughtful and less inflammatory responses.
My one cavil is the the general approbation of Indian food. Now, I adore Indian food, especially South Indian food–you just can’t beat a thali with lime pickle, mango pickle, eggplant brinjal, and fiery fish curry.
But the regular food you get in dhabas, especially in Northern India, is just gawdawful. One can get incredibly sick of eating dal and rice day in and day out.
Despite being deathly ill during most of my time in India, I liked the country. The people are friendly and extremely helpful, especially when I collapsed in the Varanasi train station. The countryside is incredibly beautiful. India’s legacy of art left behind by the Moghuls, the Chandelas, the Guptas, and the Mauryas is breathtaking. I defy anybody not to be moved by the intricate temple carvings in Khajurao, or the pietra dura inlaid stone designs that cover the Taj Mahal, the Pearl Mosque, and the Baby Taj, among others.
Yeah, India has its problems–a governemtn unrepsonsive to the needs of is people, a weak economy that drives its best and brightest abroad, and incredible health and sanitation conditions–but therese are all fixable over time. The problems facing India today are not that different from the ones England faced 150 years ago–the filth, the exploitation of the poor, the indifferent government, the class system–but look at England today. India still has to work at overcoming its problems, but there is no reason not to think that India will not arise as a giant in the next hundred years. There is nothing to be ashamed of, and much to be proud of, in being Indian.
Now I would appreciate it if you were to take some time and consider why it took you so long to do the right thing.
Then it’s obviously mutual: I definitely think you are an asshole. You are now telling me, and probably yourself (which is just sad) a lie, well maybe not a lie, but something you wish were true but really isn’t–see below. You accused me of being a racist, a liar, and a sock puppet. Others told you in no uncertain terms that you’re wrong. Your response was to send that email of yours I quoted in its entirety above. Plus you just now managed to insult, it seems, everyone else judging my Anthracite’s comment above. Consider this, please: “First Rule of Holes: Stop Digging!”
This is the “lie, well maybe not a lie, but something you wish were true but really isn’t” I believe you’re telling yourself. I tell you here and now that I am not stupid. Do not expect me to be so stupid then as to believe that is the reason you did that. The text of the email you sent certainly shows that you really thought that I’m Slicky. And all after others had told you that there’s no proof of that.
NO! All you had to do was retract your unfounded and unwarranted accusation. You refused to do that and sent that email.
There’s a really cool line in one of my favorite SciFi books (The Final Reflection): “If I hadn’t wanted it heard, I wouldn’t have said it.” Once you send email to someone, it’s that person’s property. You are obviously well aware that I’m using AOL since you sent it to me at my AOL email–that it’s my property is AOL’s position on the matter. That it embarrasses you is your problem, not mine. Your email was not “to clear it up,” it was to compound your accusation of me. Don’t ever call me or imply that I am a liar again, kid, unless you have damn good proof. Don’t ever call me or imply that I am a sock puppet again unless you have damn good proof. Don’t ever call me or imply that I am a racist again unless you have damn good proof. Don’t do it to anyone else for that matter either. Your email was essentially a further accusation of it. Check out what another poster said about “proving innocence.” The way it works in reality is that the accuser (you) have to prove guilt against the accused (me).
As opposed to slinging the insults of “liar, racist, and sock puppet” around at someone against whom you have no proof of that? I am glad I don’t live in your world.
Then it would’ve been worthless as your accusations against me were in public. One day, I hope, you’ll understand that.
Everyone doesn’t know that. Here’s some advice: preface opinion with something that indicate’s it’s your opinion–do not assert your opinion is fact. That will do you good in real life in addition to helping you on this message board. You’ll notice above that I used the term “I believe” above to indicate an opinion of mine.
You insulted me in public and compounded it with that asinine email. Others had gotten involved in the issue and therefore this was the right place to respond to it. You could’ve avoided that by (1) not making the unfounded accusations, or once you had made them by (2) retracting them. Had you sent an email to me to apologize instead of to compound the accusation, I would’ve responded with “Thanks. Now post your apology on the board and I’ll accept it on the board.”
Again: Don’t blame me for stuff that’s not my fault.
Honest, non-racist, non-prejudiced, non-sockusing, respecter of board protocol, last I heard. Well, some say I’m ornery but if you don’t want to see someone’s ornery side don’t call them liars, racists, or sock puppets when they’re none of that.
I did no such thing. For one thing, I don’t have the power nor the skill. I certainly don’t have the inclination as I tend to be a tad lazy on occasion.
I wanted to see you apologize because you were wrong and the insults you leveled against me were grievous by the standards of this board. I’m not laughing at you. I pity you and your view of the world. Many posters on this board are aware that I don’t think anyone’s “better” than another. I focus on words and behavior.
I wasn’t aware that you’re a prophet. Your last sentence in this part also is part of what got you, IMHO, in a bit of a sticky wicket to begin with. And it seems to be further proof that you’re not interested in facts.
I see that you are telling yourself something you wish were true. You may be attempting to tell it to me but I’m not buying it.
On this particular board, “sock puppet,” “racist,” and “liar” are insults. “Sock Puppet” is one of the worst insults on this board due to certain “sock invasions” in the past. Like anywhere else, this is a community and the community decided some time ago not to tolerate socks puppets.
IIRC, someone did take Slicky to task for that.
How clearing this up? Are you now saying again that you still think I “took on another identity,” a sock puppet?
On this site, apparently, both are equally bad.
I believe you need to finish clearing this up. And then get back to talking about India. Others have already indicated what the “site priorities” are for such a situation. That’s part of the community. And if you don’t want to be part of a particular community on the internet, there’s a very simple solution.
Anthracite, your damn right about me being a newbie and no-one cares. It makes total sence, and I was nodding my head in agreement as I read on.
Sorry to make you a little angry, the tone of your post made me kinda furious. Sorry.
Monty, India is far out of the question now.
I…I don’t know what I can do now. Everything I said was quoted and pointed out. I can’t say I am embarrassed, because thats MY fault. I can’t say I was right, because I’M NOT. I can’t do anything without being accused of something else, and then being proved I was wrong.
Again you manipulated people, and denied it. You say you can’t manipulate people, which is again manipulation. See how you made a mockery of everything I said? How you make me look like the bad guy, again?
That is manipulation. I thought it was obvious.
Also, you think I am lying to myself when I said you would post my e-mail again. Then even though we saw you already did it, you deny you would do it again? That is why we lock up murderers. We can’t take their word for it when they say they won’t do it again.
You think I am lying to myself when I say your an asshole? Well I’m not. Assholes make people feel bad, I feel bad. You made me feel bad, horrible even. FYI you are the only person in this world who thinks I am an asshole.(even though you think we live in different worlds) I swear if you met me in real life without knowing I was Teelo, you would be shocked to find out that Teelo is such a nice person.
And when you say In Your Humble Opinion, I’m sure you mean In Your Superior Opinion. Showing how much better at posting and quoting you are. And ooh, look at my perfect grammer and my big words. And Calling me a prophet? I don’t get that. When did I say I was a prophet?
And when I e-mailed you to level with you, I was serious. Take it anyway you want, I was making one last weird attempt, trying to be friends. but obviously you don’t want that. Again i’m not lying to myself.
This thread would of been way more pleasant if you hadn’t interviened and shown how much smarter you were about India and shwoing how I didn’t care about facts, and how you wanted me to be hit upside the head, along with Wearia. I would like for you both to know, that if I was hit, you would be hit back, double force. I’m not the biggest strongest person, but I have always fought back, even if the person is 2x my weight, etc.
Since you don’t want me here, I don’t have to stay. I don’t want to go through you and your bullshit again. Plus, it would really bother me if I made you uncomftorble…
If you don’t want me here, I’ll go.
Hell, I could leave and make myself a new nick, and no-one would ever know. Oh no, I just insulted myself whoop-de-fuck, look at how ticked I am.
Now, everyone watch Monty copy and paste everything I said and again make me look like the idiot, and show that it is my fault, and everyone will think his way. Typical.
Try to read what’s written for comprehension. I said “In that case, Teelo: How about slapping yourself upside the head for the comments about India?” That’s known as an expression. It doesn’t have anything to do with me wanting to hit you or me wanting anyone else to hit you. You’ll notice that you’d already used that “slap upside one’s own head” emoticon already by that time. Another thing is tossing physical threats around is also cause for moderator action against you. You’re really racking up the brownie points here, kiddo!
I don’t care if you go or if you stay. I care if you toss around unfounded accusations against me. Your unfounded accusations were YOUR bullshit. As others have told you–REPEATEDLY–you ought not to do that.
So you really don’t care about the board’s rules then?
In other words, since you say you’re 16, try acting it.
I was expecting an enlightening thread of how indians adjust to a new culture around which they would like to settle down; and I get to see misunderstandings further misunderstood and apologies and rebuttals…
I am just going to ignore all the posts and post my own ramblings here and hijack the thread for a few seconds…
My thoughts on this topic are just way too confused to be put in words. While I am proud of my work and of the experience I am getting in my field, I am confused as to whats the point of life. I am probably just in an early mid-life crisis (I am 25) and so probably unrelated to the culture issues. But may be not. Maybe I should just stop driving 10 hours over the weekend and just go to sleep now.
end of hijcack. please tune back to your original stations.
monstro: Yeah I can see what ya mean. When I was referred to as a Paki, it was from one of my really good friends who was just joking around. We respect each other alot, and this was before 9/11 he just didn’t know much about India and Pakis,(If you will) to know that they are quite different. As I said it still kinda sucked to explain myself and my heritage while I was in class with many open ears!
Um, and yes I am very fortunate! I meet nice people who don’t judge me by how I look but see me for who I am. Which brings me to an interesting mini story.
It was in grade 9, science class, and for a reason I can’t remember the teacher was dividing everyone up. I will try and explain. He would start at the top with student, then draw a line on the marker board from “student” to the left and another line to the right. At the tip of each line, he wrote, girl and boy. The class was divided by hair color, eye color, even height, until everyone was seperated by their own unique physical appearance.
On one of the last strands me and another boy who had the same color of eyes, same dark hair, same height, the only difference was that he was white! The class tried to find noticable differences between us, but couldn’t! I took that as how respected I was by some of these people that I rarely talked to and barely were friends with. They never saw my darker skin color as different. It made me so happy. They were stumped until finally the teacher said, “How about, darker shade of skin?”
It made my day.
Now the fun part!
Monty: Well who would of thought, wait! Hold on!.. you, you Monty, think I am an asshole? And what? A fool! WOW I never thought someones opinion could be so oblivious to me! Amazing!
And since you didn’t notice, I never used the “slapping ones self on the head” emoticon. I used a confused one, and a putz one. Showing I was confused, and you were being a putz, at the time I wasn’t serious because 1. I had nothing against you it was not a big deal, lets be friends, and 2. our little friend was winking. Did ya notice that?
I would also like to point out, that I read this somewhere…
Where did I get that? Ah yes! The General rules about the place!
Now I am aware that in this thread, I WAS a jerk! I was SUCH a jerk! BUT, would I of gotton there without Monty? Nope! I sure would of gotton there with Slickys insulting messages, but hey I didn’t start the arguing with that one.
Anyway, you said something about my “obvious insufficient look” Thats pretty rude, I can think of 10 ways to say that nicer. But no, Monty is who he is and likes to get the point across as rudely as possible. So, I decided to calmy say, “I never said that! Read the whole post next time!” This was not a snappy tone, and I’m sorry you took it this way, it was one of those happy “your a silly-head” tones. To be nice, and get the point across. But ya know, Saying someone is wrong can hardly be taken a nice way especially on the internet, but I tried. And I supose I failed!
Then after, you wanted me to “pull my head out” possibly from my own ass as you wanted everyone to think.
But it didn’t stop there, you had to use nice BIG letters spaced out for the proper effect showing how L O U D you were, then stating that yojimbo had compitence in reading, (suggesting I don’t) then insulting my intelligence, then saying I am “prejudice”.
(note: I never asked for an apology, I let it slide)
Oh, and that I read posts with my eyes closed.
(which is impossible, unless someone makes this braile, and I would have to know braile, which I don’t)
Again I can think of 10 different ways to say that nicely. Without your Jerky tone you have demonstrated.
Then as Wearia clearly used the “slapping head emoticon” not me, it showed that he was a little mad at himself for not telling me about the whole logging out thing and that it was a small mistake! But there you decided to have him imply slapping me upside the head for having an opinion. Sounds like a physical threat to me.
The point of this, you ask? First of all I would of never, ever accused you of having a sock puppet if you showed a little courtesy to me. If you had a more happier, mature tone to your post, do you think I would of blamed you for socking? I saw a relation because both had pissed attitudes at me. And you and me would not consider each other assholes if, and I quote…
Now who is the bad guy.
Shame ya can’t delete posts eh?
And, even though we both hate each other, this has been one memorable time. When this thread is long dead, I am going to print this off and store it away and remember the good times…I’ll look back and see how dumb we both were for arguing, but hell it was fun? Wasn’t it? I think everyone especially me and Monty, and of course Slicky made some pretty memorable posts, and I won’t let those get away!
I would also like to retract my claims when I said “India is out of the question.” I want to talk about India, and my new point of view upon it!!
I had a few talks with my mum and made me feel so much happier about being Indian.
She talked to me about how 5000 years B.C. India had universities! Universities people! Gah! :-o
She told me about some parts in her life growing up and how she had to live through 2 wars! 2 wars! I never knew she had to go through that! She said it didn’t really effect her, but every night they had to put newpapers on the windows so by chance if bombers came by at night they would not know where to drop one because it was a total blackout through the city. I was in shock.
She even gave me 2 books to read, both by Indian authors 1 is an international best seller! Its called The God of Small Things by Arundhati Roy. My mum loved it and I am sure I wll too.
The other book is Such a Long Journey by Rohinton Mistry. She told me this book will show me what it was like during the wars. Even, her age of 16 during the wars. I am totally happy that I finally have some proper insight into her life in India. I asked her if there were any books that I could check out in the library about India’s history, but sadly if there was I would have one hell of a heavy book to lift!!
Anyone have any quesitons about India they would finally like to ask me?
I’d stay and chat, But “Family Guy” is on, and that show rocks my socks.
I’m really glad you and your mum had a chat about the Indian part of your heritage. I read The God of Small Things a few months ago - I think it’s a brilliant book. India has produced several great authors in recent times - Rabindranath Tagore (poet, 1913 Nobel prize winner for literature) , RK Narayan, Vikram Seth…
I sense you’ve got a real thirst for knowledge about India now - and that’s a good thing. “The fight against ignorance begins at home”, eh? Have fun finding stuff out!
I think he was saying that we all DO have stuff to do just like him. Or, I’m wrong. But I took this as an innocuous comment to ease tensions, not the reverse.
Yes, it was Weario who’d used that “slap upside one’s head” emoticon and not you. The actual point, though, is that the emoticon had already been used and surely you can’t be unaware that it’s only an expression.
That’s not news, judging by your contiinued and cavalier disregard of what others have been telling you for some time. See Anthracite’s & Beeble’s postings.
My friends are of quite decent character. You do not, therefore, qualify as “friend material.” At any rate, I just covered the bit abut the emoticon above.
We have on basic rule: Don’t be a jerk
[/quote]
Where did I get that? Ah yes! The General rules about the place!
Now I am aware that in this thread, I WAS a jerk! I was SUCH a jerk!
[/quote]
The general rules about this place also covered accusing people of being sock puppets. Guess you forgot about that, huh?
Horse apples. Your OP has you starting out as a jerk.
Yeah, and at the time you decided (with no evidence, btw) that I’m Slicky.
Oh, and calling an entire country a slum’s not rude?
Incorrect.
See, now you’re forgetting exactly whom I was addressing in that post. I expect that the name to the left of the post is the name of the person actually making the post. Try to get the timeline straight.
It’s called emphasis. Anyway, I was addressing the poster known as Wearia for the apparent posting–you gave that appearance by forgetting or neglecting to ensure it was your username and not Wearia’s you were using. And your OP showed the prejudice you have against India.
As you well should have let it slide. You were wrong. Now enlighten me about the comment about “locking murderers up.” How exactly should that apply to you? Certainly you don’t think I’m a murderer and I certainly don’t think you are. I see you trying to make a point, and failing, with the comment.
Addressed to Wearia, that one. Again, you’re forgetting the timeline.
Can you think of 10 different ways of calling India a slum without the comment being insulting? Same thing applies here.
Then you’re definintely a fool. I said “slap yourself upside the head.” I didn’t say "Wearia, go slap Teelo upside the head. I said “slap yourself upside the head.” It’s an expression.
Then you’e an extreme asshold and a bigger fool than I already thought you were. This comment of yours just quoted shows that you knew you had no proof of me using sock puppets yet you still accused me of it. That qualifies as courtesy in your life? Sad, extremely sad.
Obviously, you. I don’t see where you get “how much smarter you were about India.” And, for the last time, “slap yourself upside the head” is an expression. It doesn’t have a thing to do with an actual physical act.
Talking to yourself here, no doubt.
I don’t count it as fun when some little twerp foolish asshole accuses me of being a racist. At any rate, I don’t hate you. I despise stupidity.
And now that your mother’s talked to you about India, good. Glad you’re finally learning that it’s not a slum.
Well, let’s not go overboard here. There’s a lot to like about India, but Indian cities are filthy, crowded, and horribly polluted, plus I got mugged by monkeys in Agra–I had fruit, they wanted it, they got it.
