I have a friend teaching in China who is in his early 30s and very overweight- in the 375 lb range, I’d guess. He is here to have sex with girls. Eventually he would like to marry one, but until he finds that one he is going to have as much sex as possible. He outright admits this and is totally honest about why he’s here.
On one hand- he’s got a right to some companionship, too. He knows the women are just in it for the money (in his case, the chance to marry him.) He doesn’t have a bit of illusion. But really, what are his romantic prospects at home? Why shouldn’t he accept what is being freely offered to him? He doesn’t lie to these girls. He doesn’t misrepresent himself. Sure, they may not be on the same wavelength and may have hope that shouldn’t be there. But when everyone is taking advantage of everyone, can you really blame any of them? And anyway, women like sex, too. It’s not like he’s preying on innocents. He’s having sex with people who want to have sex with him.
And anyway, where is it the rule that “only ugly people should have sex with ugly people?”
On the other hand, it’s gross. He’s always complaining about his girlfriend. He goes on and on about how she’s shallow, unrealistic, knows little about the world, etc. Well, I finally found out his girlfriend is 20. Duh, she’s going to act like a teenager. And these girls are being treated not as people, but as commodities. He can be very dehumanizing towards the women who he sleeps with.
And he’s nowhere near the worst I know. I know a guy who “specializes” in virgins. I know a guy who has a complicated and disgusting “system” which leads to him going to with a new girl every weekend night, getting off, and ushering them out the door. So where is this line?
I figured it was bragging, too. Where’s the innocence lost? He didn’t seem all that innocent to begin with to me. I got the sense we weren’t supposed to feel bad for him–it seemed more like that joke, “If you’re not Catholic, why are you telling me?” “I’m telling everyone, Father!”
Everyone likes to think that every guy who gets involved with a no-good Thai girl is a horny, bald, overweight old man. This is really just not true. Sure, there are plenty like that, but many of the guys that get into this are regular, younger guys. I think that these guys are even MORE likely to get conned exactly because they are regular, normally attractive guys. A guy who is hardly a catch knows EXACTLY why the girls are interested in them (their wallet).
When I lived in Bangkok I met up with a decent young man from Belgium. He was a nice guy, only in town for a couple of weeks, so I took him out with some friends. One was a woman, probably about 10-15 years older than him, who was a friend of a friend sort who got out with us. Next thing I knew it, he was totally head over heels for her, which I knew was a really bad situation. I tried to talk him out of it, but he was “in love”. I don’t know what came of it but I hope he didn’t get cleaned out. She was not a bar girl, but more like a shrewd barracuda. Frankly, some of the girls that work in the beer bars are very sweet, or are when they start out, before they get mentored by some of the more diabolical ones. And some, at least in Bangkok, are not so much prostitutes; gold diggers is probably a better term.
Please raise my disgust with the whole “Asian girlfriend” thing up a notch.
Seriously, Sam, WTF? Summarizing that vomitous claptrap as “Innocence Lost Forever: Man Escapes Thai Sex Scene” is quite possibly the single most misogynist thing I have ever witnessed on these boards.
That guy needs to get his ass kicked, Death Proof-style, about daily for the rest of his space-wasting life.
I don’t know about that. But I do know that the guy in the link is a horny, bald, overweight man, which makes it all that much easier to connect the dots.
Yeah, but this guy was going out of his way to sleep with and then dump as many girls as he could. It’s not like some adorable girl took advantage of him, took his money and then sent him spiraling.
Don’t have much sympathy for the guy in the link, or most of the guys who get caught up in this. Most of these guys just leave me shaking my head in amazement.
Was just noting that not all that get caught up meet the profile.
I don’t get why this guy should be hated for what he did. Sex over there is just a commodity, and he was partaking of it.
Fuck this notion that sex is some holy sacred thing that can only be had between two people who are in love, or some other bullshit. All it is, is stimulating a part of your body until you have an orgasm, using someone else’s body. The other person should also ideally have an orgasm, but I doubt that prostitutes give a shit as long as they get paid. This is all sex is. It’s a primitive act and there is nothing about it that deserves to be put on a pedestal.
The only part that I object to is his bitching and whining about it, with his over-dramatic “innocence lost” shit and everything. But even that is not cause to want to see the guy get his ass kicked every day for the rest of his life. (?!) It’s not like this guy hacked off a woman’s head or set a daycare center on fire. Come on.
Where is the story there? It’s a boring, meandering piece of drivel. “I fucked around in Thailand for years, but I got bored and frustrated. Also I was banging many different chicks.”
I can’t believe I read the whole thing hoping at some point it would get interesting. Unlike some of the other responses I don’t care to fling judgement on the guy for however many women he screwed with, it’s just terrible writing.
You forgot to mention the pictures. It wasn’t just “I dated some beautiful women,” it was also, “I have pictures to prove it.” It’s hard to feel much sympathy (which is what the title “Innocence Lost” seems to be asking for) when he’s still gloating over his trophies.
I mean, if he wants to continue living that lifestyle, then he should. If he sincerely thinks it’s damaging to himself, then stop. IMO it’s basically offensive in that it’s hypocritical, like the guy is fixing to start thinking about maybe possibly changing his ways…someday…but first needs to brag some more. :smack:
Heh- I thought the telling picture was the second one down with the older lady behind them. The look on her face is more realistic than the cheesey smile of the others.
It’s not the wild-party-all-night scene you may find in other areas. But marriage has a bit of a “business transaction” aspect, and many young women will do what it takes to get their shot at the big win. People don’t come for the pure hedonism of it. Mostly they are chubby short guys looking for a playing field where they have some advantages.
But once they realize they can have three steady girlfriends and flings on weekends with cute twenty year olds it tends to turn them a bit and they start getting predatory.
Why do people think the only guys who delve into this stuff are fat, bald middle-aged losers who can’t get an American girl? First of all, so what if they are? So some 60 year old dude who’s divorced or widowerized shouldn’t have sex again unless he can find some woman to settle down with?
I personally know and have met a lot of guys who regulary frequent prostitutes, take “sex trips” to places like Poland or Chech Republic and I myself spent several months in Amsterdam (although not for sex, that was a legitimate business trip). Most of these guys were young (20s and early 30s), single, and relatively attractive. At least they weren’t old troglodytes or anything.
It’s not really my thing, but for a lot of these guys, it’s no worse than going to a strip club or ordering a pizza. You’re on vacation, feel like having fun, so you pay a gorgeous girl a couple hundred $US for some sex (well…technically you pay them to leave;) ).
OTOH, it seems like a lot of those guys do have some issues going on though that has nothing to do with their ability or inability to get laid.