I have an odd issue. I do some tutoring work and came into conflict with a superior (who is not really my boss, as it’s basically freelance). I work at a university.
Work has been slow (nonexistant) spring and summer semesters. No problem. I have caused no issues other than wanting a time sheet restored after a third party changed it, and wanting to make sure my contact information was updated. In fact, that was the only reason I was there today.
This man came in to a brief (as in, 3-minute) update on procedure and information, after updated informationw as requested. He immediately acted as if I was causing trouble by asking for tutoriung assignments and lectured me (at length) that they were overstaffed for tutoring and they would decide what assignements were there yada yadda. I did in fact interrupt (which may not have been wise) with increasing confusion to say that I knew that, I understood, and simply was there to update my information. To me, this behavior was un-called for and in fact nakedly insulting. I know the facts. He had previously given almost the exact same spiel (and I had no problem with it… the first time).
He then immediately took offense and demanded to know if I had a “sharp attitude” [His word] with students, which only incensed me further. I simply do not understand why he butted in, acted as if I were an idiot, and then got offended when I was upset by that attitude. I responded that his speech was seriously talking down to me. I also offered that we should let the issue go. He then got really huffy and asked me to leave. I was *extremely *offended by that as well as his questioning my tutoring.
Now, it’s possibly I may not have handled that as a saint, but his manner was, frankly, unprofessional and insulting. I responded rather mildly and in confusion, particularly since he has little direct authority over me (he can probably bar me from tutoring with that service, but I don’t really care now). Frankly, I probably won’t get any more tutoring contracts since another individual (the one who changed my timesheet against policy and ethical conduct) also affects this and did not want to change it back.
My question now is if I shoudl send him an email, and cc or bcc his boss on the matter, so as to protect myself, even if it ends up that I get nothing substantial. I sort of wrote up a letter, although it’s a little overdone, I though more formality better than the alternative. Plus, I’ve been reading civil war diaries.
[To Mr. Guy, titles etc.]
"Dear Sir,
I do not entirely understand why we came into conflict, and the conversation utterly confuses me. I certainly do not wish, did not wish, and have no interest in offending you, and therefore write this letter in the hopes of healing any such wounds.
Whether your recognize it or not, your manner insulted me gravely, and I responded as mildly as I felt I could, and only to inform you that I was not there for such purposes, but only to update my information and double-check procedure on that. I have made no complaints at all over not having tutoring assignments. I do not understand why non-question this required your answer on that topic, which deeply hurt by responding as if I had.
I hold you in the highest regard, and it was that this came from someone I respect deeply which wounded me, as was your refusal to speak further. If I have given offense in any fashion, I hope you will forgive me, and if not, that we can thereby eliminate that problem and chalk it up to simply different modes of communication that did not mesh well."
Your job sounds rather stressful (dealing with people with too much time and unrealistic expectations) hopefully today will be better!
Just kidding