Iron Chef part San

Due to my deep respect for Challenger Scylla, (and a bit of reconsideration,) I will allow the time extension he suggested, since, when it comes down to it, real life must come first and this should be fun as well as challangeing! Therefore,

Both Iron Chef and Challenger have until 6:OO AM, Saturday morning, June 16, Mountain Standard Time

Judging will begin immediatly thereafter, and will last until 6:00 PM Sunday night, June 17, Mountain Standard Time. Again, anyone who judges will have the option to be in the drawing for the the next Challenger!

That out of the way,

:: With a flourish of the cloth covering the mysterious ingredients, the foodstuff ascends into Kitchen Stadium, billows of dry ice smoke curling around Chairman Fenris’s feet. ::

It is spring, and a hailstorm has virtually destroyed my crop of the theme ingredient this year. I am appalled that the forces of nature would conspire against me. Therefore, I choose this ingredient in memory of my lost crop.

It’s blossoms nourish our souls in the spring and it’s fruit nourishes our bodies in the fall.

The theme ingredient is…

:: With a sharp yank, Chairman Fenris unveils the theme ingredient ::

Apples.

A huge pile of perfect apples are the ingredient. There are:
Sweet Winesaps, glistening a dark crimson
Pink Lady, pale red, sweet and crisp, (and the Chairman’s favorite non-heirloom apple)
Granny Smiths green and tart,
Golden Delicious, soft and juicy
Northern Spy
and rarest of all,
Knobbed Russet an heirloom variety of apple. Although it’s lumpy and yellow-grey and unappealing to the eye, the crisp texture and sugary flavor make this the pick of the lot.

And now,

Allez Cuisine!

:: the Gong of Fate sounds ::

Chairman Fenris steps back to watch the fun.

A light smile creases Scylla’s lips.

He looks at Javamaven with barely concealed glee, mouthing a single word.

“Doomed.”

I blithely ignore Scylla and run for the apples.

A few of the perfect Pink Ladies fall into my basket; I fondle several Granny Smiths before choosing them.

Peeler in hand, I am ready.

(Thank you for extending the deadline, as my work schedule has kept me very busy this week. )

P.S. I’m ok with a late-arriving judge, if Scylla is.

Actually there are two late-arriving judges.

Since neither chef had an objection, Chilly Willy and Mike G, welcome! Enjoy watching and commenting, and be prepared to judge!

Chairman Fenris

With a deep inner calmness I wait until Javamaven has finished rummaging through the fruits.

Walking up to the cart, I shudder as a trickle of pleasure runs through my body.

Each apple seems to speak to be begging me to create. But, likee people, the truth of an apple is rarely revealed from its surface presentation…

Carefully I select an assortment.

There are three important days in the harvesting of apples, and in nearby Biglerville it is both a science and an art.

There is the day of promise:

This day occurs before the apples are truly ripe. It is a day of heady anticipation, and the apples are hard and tart.

There is the day of perfection:

There is an urgency, a greed, and almost a gluttony to this, and a longing that can never be satisfied. The apples are like a first lover in the fullness of bursting youth. And, in their perfection, there is a melancholy foreshadowing due to it’s transcience.
There is the day of memory:

Like a Sunday afternoon at the beach when you know you must go to work the following morning, this day is the most beautiful, but also the saddest. The apples of this day are just past their prime. There is a softness and graininess to their texture. No longer are they bursting with vigor, but rather remind one slightly of a balloon that has slightly deflated. There may be touches of brown within the apple meat, and fools may discard or disdain such apples, the way they may overlook a beautiful and lustrous woman just past the prime of youth, but both make the same error, for on this day they are the sweetest of all.

Tears flow freely down my cheeks as I select these.

Though I wish to maintain a sporting atitude, there is a mild look of horror on my face as I behold Javamaven with her gauche peeler. I cannot conceal it.

“Never fear, my beauties,” I say as I gently caress the skins of my charges. “'Tis a far far better thing we shall do.”

Then, when I’m sure the camera is not looking I cross my eyes and stick out my toungue at Javamaven.

Just as a very Un-Kaga-like aside, my internet connection at home is FUBAR. I don’t mean that it’s not working, I mean, literarally F-U beyond all recognition. I’ve got a couple of truly screwball errors. A Windows reinstall may be needed. If I’m not around much the next day or so, that’s why.

Fenris
(I also can’t get my e-mail from work and I can’t access it at home, so I’m kinda incommunicado 'till this is fixed. But a Windows reinstall isn’t a big deal, so with luck, I’ll be posting tomorrow)

[sub]We will now pause for a short commercial break[/sub]

SDMB Iron Chef Part San is brought to you by Kamandi’s All-Natural Washington Apple Cider.
::View of flannel-clad man strolling in a sun-filled apple orchard. Birds are heard in the background.::

“My Grandfather moved to Washington in 1892 with nothing but some dried-up apple cores and a dream. He toiled for years against great hardship to make that dream a reality for his family. But since his dream was to race mountain lions for sport, it was not to be. He died a mad, penniless and broken man.”

::A lanky black labrador dog lopes alongside the flannel-clad man. The man tosses a stick off camera. The dog runs after it. More birdsounds.::

"My father learned from Grandpa’s deranged mistake. After Grandpa’s suicide, Dad found the old, dried up apple cores that Grandpa had brought with him from the old country - and which had been Grandpa’s only friends at the end - he called them “Clem” and “Rufus”.

"Dad planted those seeds on the land that was to be Grandpa’s mountain lion racetrack. And with a bit of luck, a whole lotta toil, and some state-subsidized irrigation, he built the beautiful orchard you see behind me.

::The dog returns with the stick. The man pats the dog on the head. The dog looks lovingly up at the man. Chirp, chirp. You get the idea.::

“So next time you have a hankerin’ for some good, nutricious, satisfying apple cider, remember my Grandpa, and his dreams for his family, and pick up a bottle of Kamandi’s All-Natural Washington Apple Cider.”
Kamandi’s All-Natural Washington Apple Cider. 100% guaranteed to contain absolutely no mountain lions. Because Kamandi’s grandfather was a deranged fool.

Heeey, kids! What’s MORE FUN than Christmas in Disneyland? What’s BETTER than a whole summer vacation packed into ONE DAY?

That’s right, it’s Unkle Kamandi’s Apple Orchard Playland, now celebrating Amazing Annual Applorama!

We’ve got ALL your favorite rides! There’s the Golden Delicious Merry Go 'Round, Smash 'em Up Apple Carts and the legendary Granny Smith Spook-House! And, if you dare, come ride the world’s tallest wooden roller coaster: The Apple-ator - made entirely from apple trees!

And be sure to bring your appetites! Because everyone knows you can only get Mrs Kamandi’s Top-Secret Apple Pie Barbecue here at Unkle Kamandi’s Apple Orchard Playland!

And we haven’t forgotten Mom and Dad! We’ve expanded Doc Kamandi’s Cider Saloon! While the kids are playing with Kamandi’s Klown Korps, come try our new applewood smoked salmon. Wash it down with a pint of Sweet Winesap cider, always two-for-one during happy hour.

So be sure to nag your parents every fifteen minutes to take you out to Unkle Kamandi’s Apple Orchard Playland!

[sub]With apologies to Dennis Leary

Just a note to the Chefs: Remember, tomorrow, 6 AM, MST!

Chairman Fenris

(Running up panting in exhaustion. Cursing self for continuing to smoke even though he knows its bad for him.) Fenris, sorry to take so long to get back to you, but the reason I just wanted to observe this is because I work 40+ hours a week and go to school 20 hrs a week, so I’d be doing a disservice to the great chefs we have here if I tried to present myself as a judge. However, after next week, I’m out of school until the 5th, so if you hold another Iron Chef before then, I’ll be honored to be a judge.

Hah! Pfft. No sweat, says this Iron Chef.

(Don’t notice the sweat pouring off my brow trying to madly write up these recipes between my 11 hour shift at the restaurant and trying to help my SO pack for his trip out of town.)

Scylla: You may be the master of writing food porn, but I create food porn. :stuck_out_tongue:

[sub] sheesh. A year here, and I still screw up that smilie. I meant: [/sub] :stuck_out_tongue:

Very nice job, but you were supposed to push the “Northern Spies”. We have a surplus we’ve gotta move before they get all mooshy…

Chairman Fenris

(Kidding aside, the first one was good, but the second one made me laugh out loud: “Apple-ator”, “Applorama” <snicker> )

Tonight’s entries represent a multi-course ensemble representing the three primary days of apple harvest: Anticipation, Perfection, and Memory.

Ensemble Course #1

I have chosen to describe the Anticipation course with a garden of Eden them. We have gone for a decidedly whimsical presentation, that nonetheless highlights the delights to be sampled herein.

A single giant platter contains three dishes. Covering the bulk of the platter is the first dish Apple Lo Mein Salad. Crispy iceberg lettuce, spinach and greens cover the dish artistically to represent the Garden of Eden. Here a strand of broccoli represents a bush, there a radish is artistically carved into a flower garnish. Interspersed within the greens are strings of lightly fried apple skin, which add a color and texture to this salad which can’t fail to please. Through the center of the presentation a wide single layer of Apple Vinagrette dressing runs as if it were a stream crossing the garden. coiling through the garden, near the brocolli bush is the snake. The snake is made of homemade apple Lo mein noodles. Pink flecks of apple skin break the surface of the noodles, giving a decorative scaley appearance. The head of the snake is carved simply from a triangular apple quarter. It has peppercorns for eyes. At the tale of the snake are three consecutively sized cherry tomatos, giving the snake a distinct rattler-like appearance.

A third of the way around the plate is a carved male apple head representing Adam. Layed out in anatomically correct position are none other than Apple Smoked Spare Ribs of course. These succulent and juicy ribs have been slow cooked in the smoker fed with apple wood until the meat is literally about to fall of the bones. The smoky applewood taste of the succulent pork is enhanced by a sweet apple-honey glaze. These ribs cannot help but make the heart yearn with anticipation for the main course. Their delight is enhanced by the fact that theere is only one apiece for each of our judges.

The final third of the plate is garnished with a single crabapple with a frown, carved into a females face, Eve seems to glower dourly with youthful petulance into a steaming bowl of Crabapple Gumbo. This truly inspired dish seduces all with it’s heady seafood aroma. The traditional New Orleans gumbo has been enhanced to compliment the oriental leanings of the Lo mein, with a hint of sweet and sour taste created with the judicious use of Granny Smith and Golden delicious apples (with help from lemon.) The odd combination resonates poignantly but correctly with the sultry seafood broth, crabmeat, whole clams and whole crab claws to be found within!

The entire platter is presented to the judges as a whole before it is broken up and served into individual portions. Like the promise of youth the presentation is gone even before it can be fully appreciated.

Ensemble Course #2

The main dish symbolizing the day of perfection and the hedonism of youth fulfilled, is none other than a giant Apple Smoked Roast Beef. This is a top round Angus cut exceeding five pounds. The delicate fat cap has been left on during the smoking process, so the juices pervade the marbled meat, keeping it tender through the lengthy smoking process. It is sliced thin, on an angle and cooked to a wondrous medium rare. Bloody juices pour forth and waves of woodsy apple smell waft from the delicate beef from deep flavor pockets of spiced onions, apple, and celery which have been stuffed along the perimeter of this fine cut. It is served with horseradish on the side, and accompanied appropriately by Apple Sauce, and Apple Sourdough Bread with Apple Butter. One is invited to dig in heartily to this course symbolizing youth in its prime as one enjoys the very different textures and tastes created with that most versatile fruit, the apple. Notice the return of smoked meat theme which was hinted at in the apetizer course, and whose promise is now fulfilled.
As a final “in joke” making reference to the colossal bad taste and indiscretion of hedonistic youth, this course is served with a bottle of Boon’s Farm Apple flavored wine, Vintage 2000, to be had at a mere cost of $4.00 or so from any rotgut liquor store.

This last is presented deadpan to the horrified judges before the joke is over, and the bottle tossed to be replaced by a Chante Perdrix Cornas Red Wine vintage 1995.

Ensemble Course #3

What apple contest would be complete without apple pie?

With the final dish of Pastry Crusted Whole Apple Pie we have fulfilled the sweetness of the day of memory to a heady extreme.

This deceptively simple desert is made by pre baking the apple filling and inserting it into a single hollwed out, raw granny smith apple. The cold apple with the hot filling is then wrapped in a pastry crust and baked very quickly before served on top of a mound of vanilla ice cream. Candied knobbed russets are inserted into the ice cream and a dribble of chocolate syrup completes the presentation of this sinfully delicious dish. Breaking the light pastry crust reveals the still cool apple shell and the hot interior filling. The tart and sweet contrast is reminsicent of the earlier courses.

Recipes to follow.

I’m afraid that my travels have left me exhausted, and I will be unable to post my recipes within the required deadline, as I’d hoped.

An extension would be greatly appreciated, but I will understand fully if that’s not possible.

Chairman Fenris, I am honored to receive such high praise for the commercials you ordered. Unfortunately, The “Northern Spies” spot was unavailable as the special effects crew went way over budget and could not complete the “Apple Wars” battle scene in time. My greatest apologies.

The Bimbo du Jour gasps when she sees Java light up a blowtorch during the last minutes of cooking.

“What in the world could she be using that for?”

:smiley:

(I think that’s one of the reasons I became a chef. I get to use all kinds of cool things like blowtorches.)

I’m finishing up typing these recipes.

My SO is sawing logs, and I’m ready to join him.

I’m apologizing in advance for the look of my recipes–I’ve typed them quickly, and may have missed a step or two in the process.

Iron Chef wannabe ryoushi approaches Chairman Fenris and most respectfully asks if there are any staff positions available for him to take… silent but annoying cameraman [sub]provided TVeblen doesn’t want to accept this role for a third time[/sub], commentator, it would be an honour to do anything for you and your show…

With a short bow and small flourish, I present my dishes:
** Chilled Savory Apple Soup**

The tart Granny Smith apples are used in this rich, creamy cold soup. A mixture of gently stewed vegetables are brightened by the addition of the tart fruit. It is garnished with a fried apple chip.

Roast Pheasant Breast with Apple & Wild Rice Stuffing, and Calvados Pan Sauce

Golden Delicious Apples enrich and sweeten the Wild Rice Stuffing, which is topped with a few thin slices of Roast Pheasant Breast. Calvados, the famous French apple brandy is used to make a fragrant pan sauce to tie the stuffing and pheasant together.

** Baby Rack of Lamb with Apple Chutney**

Small and tender lamb, redolent with the scent of rosemary, is served with this vibrant chutney. Sweet Winesap Apples, red onions, golden raisins, and red wine highlight the lamb, making this the perfect accompaniment.

** Arugula Salad, Roasted Apple **

A simple arugula salad is very lightly dressed with an apple cider vinaigrette, and is accompanied by a roasted Pink Lady apple half, shaved Parmesan cheese, and a small, fried cinnamon churro.

** Apple-Ginger Tart Brulee **

A fan of bruleed apple slices covers a dense, creamy ginger custard, filled in a flaky, buttery tart shell. The gentle bite of the ginger is tempered by the sweetness of the apples. A vanilla sauce drizzled on the plate adds a new dimension to the dish.
** Recipes **

Chilled Savory Apple Soup

2 Tablespoons Vegetable Oil
2 Granny Smith apples, peeled, cored and rough chopped
1 Fennel bulb, rough chop
1 Large potato, peeled and chopped
1 White onion, chopped
1 Carrot, peeled and chopped
1 Celery stalk, chopped
2 – 3 stems thyme
3 cups chicken stock (or enough to cover vegetables)
½ cup cream
Salt & White pepper (to taste)

1 apple, peeled
Oil for deep-frying

Sweat all vegetables except for potato in vegetable oil
Add potato, cover with stock, add thyme stems
Simmer until vegetables are tender
Remove thyme stems
Puree soup through blender until smooth
Strain through fine-mesh strainer or chinois, and then add cream.
Pour into bowl with ice bath to chill.
Season with salt and pepper.
Serve in cool soup plates.

For Apple Chips:

Using a mandolin or electric slicer, slice apple cross-wise into paper-thin slices.
Flash-fry in hot oil.
Drain on paper towel.

  • Roast Pheasant with Wild Rice & Apple stuffing, Calvados Pan Sauce*

1 whole Pheasant
Butter
Salt & Pepper

1 cup Wild Rice
4 cups water
3 ounces apple wood smoked bacon
¼ cup shallots, minced
2 Golden Delicious apples, peeled, cored, medium dice
¼ cup chopped pecans
1 tablespoon chopped fresh sage
Salt & Pepper to taste

½ cup pan drippings from pheasant
1 tablespoon shallots, minced
¼ Calvados

Rinse pheasant under cold water and check to remove pin feathers, etc, and pat dry.
Rub generously with softened butter, and season skin and inside cavity.
Roast at 400 degrees until internal temperature reads 160.
Let bird rest under loose foil for 10 minutes. Save all pan drippings.
Slice as needed.

For stuffing:

Boil water, add wild rice. Return to boil, then reduce heat to simmer.
Cover tightly, and let simmer for about 25 minutes, or until rice is tender.
While rice is cooking, in saucepan, render bacon
Gently sweat shallots and apples until fork tender.
When rice is finished, add shallots and apples
Toss in pecans and sage
Season to taste.
Place in buttered casserole dish, cover with foil
Bake with pheasant for 10-15 minutes, until flavors meld.

For sauce:

Using a spoonful of fat from pan drippings, sweat shallots.
Strain off rest of fat from drippings, use juices for sauce
Add juices to shallots, and bring to boil
Add Calvados, return to boil, and simmer until sauce has thickened.
Strain through Chinois and reheat when ready to use.

  • Baby Lamb Racks with Apple Chutney*

2 baby racks of lamb, frenched
¼ cup (or more as needed) Dijon-style mustard
1 cup Panko bread crumbs
2 tablespoons finely chopped fresh rosemary
1 tablespoon finely chopped parsley
Salt & pepper

2 Tablespoons butter
2 Winesap apples, peeled, cored, and med. Dice
1 red onion, medium dice
½ cup golden raisins
1 tablespoons balsamic vinegar
½ cup red wine
2 stems thyme
Salt & pepper to taste

Lamb racks:
Toss breadcrumbs with herbs and seasoning.
Smear Dijon mustard on meat
Lightly coat with breading mixture
Roast at 375, until internal temperature reads at 125 (for medium-rare—any farther and it’s overdone, IMHO)

Chutney:
On low heat, melt butter. Add red onions, and cook until glossy.
Add rest of ingredients, and simmer slowly until excess liquid has evaporated and chutney has reached a jam-like consistency. Remove thyme stems.

  • Arugula Salad, Roasted Apple*

1 oz. Shaved Parmesan
1 ½ cups washed Arugula

½ Pink Lady apple, with core removed (keep peel on)
butter as needed

2 Tablespoon apple cider vinegar
1 teaspoon Dijon mustard
¼ teaspoon ground coriander seed
¼ teaspoon cinnamon
½ cup olive oil
Salt & pepper to taste

1 cup milk
¼ lb. butter
1 teaspoon sugar
½ teaspoon salt
1 cup flour
5 eggs
Hot oil for deep-frying
Cinnamon Sugar as needed

Prepare dressing by whisking together vinegar, mustard, and seasonings. Slowly add oil while whisking constantly to incorporate.

In ovenproof sauté pan, melt butter on med-high heat
Place apple flesh-side down. Fry until edges become brown.
Place pan into hot (400 degree) oven until apple has become tender.

For Churros:
Bring milk, butter, sugar, and salt to boil.
Add flour all at once, and stir quickly until dough forms a ball.
Using a stand mixer, beat dough with paddle attachment until steam stops
Add eggs one at a time until batter is very elastic
Fill pastry bag with large star tip with batter
Pipe a 6” piece directly into hot oil
When brown, dip into cinnamon sugar and serve immediately

In small bowl, add a tablespoon of dressing, and toss arugula.
On plate, place pieces of shaved parmesan, and top with arugula.
Place apple off to side.
Top with warm churro
Apple-Ginger Tart Brulee

Tart Dough:
1 3/4 sticks (3/4 cup plus 2 tablespoons) cold unsalted butter
2 1/3 cups all-purpose flour
1/3 cup sugar
1/2 to 3/4 teaspoon salt
1 large whole egg
1 large egg yolk
1 teaspoon vanilla
1 teaspoon fresh lemon juice or water
Cut butter into 1/2-inch cubes. In a bowl whisk together flour, sugar, and salt to taste. With your fingertips or a pastry blender blend together flour mixture and butter until mixture resembles coarse meal. In a small bowl with a fork lightly beat together whole egg, yolk, vanilla, and lemon juice and stir into flour mixture. Toss mixture with fork until egg mixture is absorbed. With your hands gently knead mixture in bowl until it comes together and forms a dough. Turn dough out onto a very lightly floured surface and knead 4 or 5 times. Form dough into a disk. Chill dough, wrapped in plastic wrap, at least 1 hour and up to 1 day.
Ginger Pastry Cream:

8 egg yolks
1 ½ cups whole milk
½ cup sugar
1” peeled ginger root section, chopped
1 teaspoon vanilla
1 oz. Cold butter

Add chopped ginger to milk, and heat to a gentle boil in saucepan
Beat yolks with sugar.
Temper hot milk into yolk mixture, add vanilla
Cook on medium heat until thick
Strain through chinois into bowl while still hot, add butter and whisk until incorporated.

Apples:
Peel, core, and ¼” slice apples
In saucepan, melt 1 tablespoon butter
Gently sauté apples until just tender, add ¼ teaspoon of ground cardamom.
Remove from heat and let cool.

Assemble:

Using individual tart shells (appx. 4-5” diameter), Line and blind bake shells until golden. Fill with ginger pastry cream to top of shell. Fan 5-6 slices of cooked apple on top of cream. Sprinkle top of tart generously with sugar. With blow torch, caramelize sugar to medium brown. Serve immediately with Vanilla Sauce.

Vanilla Sauce:

6 large egg yolks
6 tablespoons sugar
2 cups whole milk
1 vanilla bean, split lengthwise
Whisk egg yolks and sugar in medium bowl until well blended, about 2 minutes. Bring milk and vanilla bean to boil in heavy medium saucepan; gradually whisk into yolk mixture. Return custard to saucepan and stir over medium heat until custard thickens and leaves path on back of spoon when finger is drawn across, about 4 minutes (do not boil). Transfer to bowl. Cover and refrigerate until cold. (Can be prepared 1 day ahead. Keep refrigerated.)

Astroboy checks in, and reads the above…
:eek:
:eek:!

I was thinking candy apples!

:eek:

Astroboy realizes that he is in WAY over his head, and frantically tries to think of a way to escape with his dignity intact…

I’m sorry to say that I won’t be able to challenge either Scylla or Java because, uh… uh… ermmm… ummm… ah ha! Because I have recently converted to a religion which forbids me to take part in any sort of contest!

Yeah, that’s it!

Astroboy runs away, throwing candy apples behind him to fend off pursuit…