Join any two current events in such a way as to create an irresponsible implication of a connection between them.
Gunman kills 8 on last day of eHarmony’s free communication weekend
4 Gunmen Seize Pakistani School as Miss Universe Visits Guantanamo Bay.
Enthusiasm Builds for Hummers Decline
Areas Flooding as Rock River Prevents Inmate’s Suicide
New Snowstorm Hammers Teen Girls in “Sexting” Case
Obama urges House to pass Madonna’s Malawi adoption ruling
Plan for GM may prevent heart disease.