Indeed, he was so lucky to fall into
Red Dawn
Lucas
Ferris Buellers day off
Platoon
Wall Street
Young Guns
Eight Men Out
Major League
Men at Work
The Rookie
Hot Shots
And then… as luck would have it he winds up on TV, as the star of the most popular sitcom.
Man was he lucky, to get paid money to be a no talent hack. Seriously, I kicked ass in my high school’s production of Our Town, I’m a way better actor than this joker. I bet if I had a dad who was an actor I’d be famous too, it’s all about who you know.
Yes! You’re right!! ALL of those movies were made after 1994!!! Oh wait… none of them were. He WAS hugely fucking lucky to be dredged up from obscurity for 2 and a Half Men. SUPER LUCKY, since he basically hadn’t worked in a decade. He was his own pathetic punchline in “Being John Malkovich.”
I NEVER said he was a no-talent hack. I said he was basically just average, and no better than lots of others who are not currently fired from the highest-paying sitcom for being psychotic drug abusers. He is nothing exceptional. He’s just luckier than others who share equal talent.
From 1984 to 1994 he was a lead or significant supporting actor in over a dozen major motion pictures. From 1995 to 2000 he did not do much of anything worthwhile, he worked steadily but in crappy movies. From 2000 to 2002 he does 2 seasons replacing Michael J Fox in Spin City, then languishes pathetically for another 18 months until he “lucks” into the lead in a wildly popular sitcom, where he’s been for the last 8 years.
For the last 27 years of his career, he’s had about 7 years, total, where he hasn’t been a major component of a hit motion picture or a hit TV show. Interesting definition of “average” and “lucky”.
If it was Jennifer Aniston screaming “Y’all are bitches I’m QUEEN OF THE WORLD” you would be laughing your ass off, and with good reason. She’s a fine, fairly sucessful actress, who was once one of the highest paid actors working, on the most popular sitcom going. That doesn’t mean she is “extraordinary.” Really, she’s nothing special – maybe slightly better than average.
Speaking of those who seem to have unusually high tolerances for substance abuse, some genticists decided to sequence Ozzy Osbourne’s DNA to see if they could figure out why he was still alive. They found out that he is literally a genetic mutant.
I believe they are currently doing a similar study on Keef.