How do people get so involved with partners they know so little about? It’s amazing.
My girlfriend and I have been together for 7 years now and I’ve been fully aware that she’s still married since day one. Her husband and his girlfriend live a block and a half away. That made it convenient for the kids (before they went off to college). No surprises here, and none of us can think of any reasons to rush into divorce.
I agree and the situations I’m thinking of were the polar opposite of what you have with your girlfriend, which sounds like a mature and transparent situation. I’ll admit to some paranoia on the idea of dating a separted man; quickly finding out his definition of “separated” is key.
Oh, the OP’s question! I think as long as both parties consider the marriage over and mutually decide to move on, it ain’t cheating.
It seems that way to me, but I think I’d draw the line where it’s okay to take up with someone else at when divorce papers have been served rather than at seperation since it’s a more certain thing that the marriage is over once they’ve agreed to divorce. As for why I don’t think they need to be officially divorced for the marriage to really be dead, perhaps I’m overly influenced by the divorce of one of my babysitting charge’s parents -it took three years for their divorce to finalize. That happens to other couples too, right?
Depends on the people and the situation.
I was separated as part of getting divorced. The divorce took eighteen months. There was no chance of reconciliation. During that time my ex husband lived with his girlfriend - and I’m pretty sure there was a lot of hot monkey sex. That does not seem unethical to me.
Now, the fact that he was having hot monkey sex with her while he was still living in our house and before I was aware of the situation - that was unethical.
If “separated” means “in the process of divorcing” - nope. If “separated” means “we are trying to work through the issues in our marriage and not divorce” then yes. If you separate as part of a process to try and fix things, you are obligated to try and fix them. Sex with other people is generally not part of the process of healing a marriage.