Is my niece going to get my present?

Miscellaneous and Personal Stuff I Must Share
1

For the past three years my family has done a sort of Secret Santa thing. It’s not really secret, but it’s a one-gifter/one-giftee thing. We’re doing this because our family is getting larger and our bank accounts are getting smaller. It’s too much of a burden to get nice things for 20+ people every year.

We’ve also set a cap of something like $25.

What’s a little weird is that the first year, I got her name. Last year I got her husband. This year I got her again. She’s gotten me all three years.

I was at a loss as to what to get her. I still feel bad about the extremely lame gift I got her when she was fourteen. Someone suggested earrings. All women love earrings, after all, right?

So I went out shopping with a friend. We started out at Brookstone. Overpriced cheap mechanical crap could be fun for the whole family. Nothing struck me. We went to another store. Nothing there, either. We then went to a jewelry store. Maybe she’d like something in a nice cardboard turquoise box.

The first thing that caught my eye was a pair of pearl earrings. Hmm, keep looking. We got a sales clerk to help us. She suggested a particular necklace. I wasn’t crazy about it, but both the clerk and my shopping companion thought it was awesome. The only problem was that it was a little more than I was prepared to spend. I don’t mind going over the price limit, especially since I’m only buying one gift and my niece is very special to me. But that was WAY over my limit. I still need to make my rent, after all.

Oh, and the chain was too short. Could they swap it out for a longer one? Sure. Chains start out at $75 and go up from there. And they wouldn’t actually swap them. I’d have to buy one. And they didn’t actually have any in that particualr store. But no problem, they could ship it too my niece, and she could just hop on over to a store near her. Looking at where the closest one is to her, she’d just have to make a short drive to either California or Arizona.

This was starting to look bleak. Let’s take a look at some other stuff.

More necklaces. Very nice. Very pricey. Very short chains. But California and Arizona are still a short drive, right.

We were back to earrings. What style does she like. Dangly? Hoops? Studs? I’m a bad uncle. I didn’t notice. If we could hop onto facebook we could look at pictures of her and find out. Except facebook is blocked that store. So is every other website. The only pages they can look at are WhitePages and Tiffany. And Tiffany is probably blocked as well.

OK, let’s go with the pearls. Both the clerk and my companion assured me that every woman needs a pair of pearl earrings.

As the clerk is writing up the sale, I started to think about this for a minute. Jewelry is awfully losable in the mail. Should I get insurance? Other post office options? My confidence was not high. No problem, Tiffany to the rescue. They’ll take care of everything. For a fee, of course. I’m not sure why this gave me more confidence. I guess they use a better USPS than I have access to. And instead of my address for the return address, it’s going to be Tiffany & Co. NO WAY that that’s going to get lost in the mail!

Where should they send it? I have no idea what my niece’s address is. But I know my brother’s. And that’s where she’s going to be on Christmas morning anyway. So I gave the clerk his address. She corrected me on the spelling. (Turns out I was right in the first place.) And she had to look up the ZIP code. “It could be one of several. Let’s try this one.”

Great.

So we got that taken care of. Christmas shopping is done!

I e-mailed my brother asking him to let me know when the package arrives. I haven’t heard back. He’s probably on the road. And I don’t know his wife’s e-mail. And they both tend to misplace things. I still remember the Great Christmas Lobster Near-Tragedy of '02.

And I just remembered this morning that my niece isn’t going to be at my brother’s. She’s going to be with her in-laws in Texas.

I know I probably should be worried. But I’m giggling to myself thinking that I blew a lot of money on the Best Christmas Fiasco Ever!

2

In answer to that long OP:
“No.”

3

kthx

4

I kept reading, thinking that your present was going to be some type of clever joke and you were wondering if she would…you know…GET it.

5

I kept wondering when we’d get to the niece being so pissed, she refused to get his present.

6

It may well end up as a joke!

7

Count me as another expecting a different story, my joke answer was going to be: ‘I don’t know, are you going to give it to her?’ but that seems a little redundant now.

I guess it would come down to the zip code business. Was the confusion that there is a Smith St in three different zip codes so let’s guess or was it that the same Smith St passes through three different zip codes?

If it was the same Smith St you should be ok, I can’t see a delivery person saying ‘this is addressed to #34 Smith St but this zip code only contains numbers #36-78’ and refusing to deliver it. On the other hand if you have addressed it to a completely different Smith St in the wrong zip code you are relying on the person at that address being full of festive spirit rather than thinking ‘cool, free pressie!’.

8

Oh, but* no one* would ever keep a gift from Tiffany’s that accidentally came to them…

9

I was quickly skimming the thread titles and read, “Is my niece going to get me pregnant?” The answer to that is also no.

10

Yes, that would be a definite no.

Bro got it yesterday, niece will swing by for a dental appointment. All is right and well with the world.

And to all a good night.

11

I am oddly pleased by this outcome.

Does this mean your niece will get you a present after all?

12

No, but her mom will.

13

Hmmm it seems I was wrong. And that is a good thing.

14

It’s a good thing, but I was secretly hoping for a little more drama. You know, to just draw it out a little longer.

15

I really would like to hear the story about this.

16

Somehow I got it into my head that year to send my brother’s family a box of lobsters. There would be six 2-pounders. At something like $240, they were way overpriced, but I think that the shipping and special handling accounted for most of that. The company that provided them was happy to take my money on the day that I ordered, but would not ship until the day that I wanted the lobsters eaten. I wanted them eaten on the 25th, but had to have them sent on the 24th.

I told my brother to plan on Christmas dinner being drawn butter, lemons, boiled potatoes, etc. and that I’d provide the rest. Thinking that he’d forget, I also told my nephew. If I told two family members, at least one of them would remember, right?

Right?

The box arrived on the 24th. On the outside it said “Live lobsters, refrigerate immediately.” That was obviously wrong. I’d just used that box to ship non-perishable presents. They put it under the tree.

After a couple of hours, the dog got awfully curious about it. That clued them in. They put it in the garage.

The next day, succulant lobster was had by all. Since my nieces invited their boyfriends, there were 6 lobsters for 7 people.