Is my wife pregnant?

Well, congratulations.

You’ll get some measure of revenge for this little joke of hers over the next nine months.

Everytime she runs yarking into the bathroom, or starts eating really bizarre things (Mrs. Dave-Guy was jonesing for relish sandwiches), or can’t hoist herself out of a chair, just chuckle a little and say, “You know, honey, I’m still laughing about how you made me think you were playing an April Fool’s joke on me with the pregnancy test.”

The best thing about this is that, at least in the last trimester, she won’t be able to chase you and catch you.

[[In case anyone is interested. The wife is pregnant. She just wanted to me think that it was an April Fool’s joke. I’m just wondering how I can introduce some bizarre humor to get even.]]

Borrow some stationary from a laboratory or public health clinic and send her a little note:
“You have been named as a contact to a person with a sexually transmitted disease. Please make an appointment as soon as possible with our clinic staff.”

(I did NOT recommend that. This is just an example of something someone else might do or wonder about.)