ISTM that to whatever degree that 80 20 is true (or experienced as true) it is true in both heterosexual directions. There are likely a minority of women whose attentions a majority of single and looking men are competing for. If so has that frustration manifested in any online female incel equivalent?
Really an FQ but I am guessing there is opinion as to what would count as such.
Questions like this remind me of a brief sketch from the Fox sketch comedy show The Edge (it was only on for a single season from 1992-1993). I can’t find a clip of it, but it was a pretty obscure show that people don’t seem to have much nostalgia for, so finding videos for that show is pretty difficult.
Anyway, the sketch was called something like “how to get a date”. From what I remember it was silent (no dialog, just background music) and it starred Julie Brown, who was the person trying to get a date.
Her method was to go into a phone booth (they still existed in the early 90s) and pick a random name from the phone book and call it. Cut to her sitting in the lap of some obese guy, she’s laughing and takes off his hat and puts it on her head. The implication of course being that men will sleep with just about anyone so it should be trivial for a woman to get a date.
(Note that this is a scripted show, I don’t think she actually called a random person in real life, it was a bit.)
I am sure that is absolutely not the reality, or at least not a universal one. But I believe that is at least the public perception. And so that might be one reason why we don’t see a female equivalent to the male incel movement.
I spent some time at a web site that had a significant number of incels, and I left because the hatred and nastiness was very real. I’ve never seen that on an organized level with women. Sure, there are female abusers, female “black widows”, what have you, but the large majority of stalking, abuse, assault, and even murder is male on female. My opinion, and it is my personal feeling on the subject, is that male incels are far more numerous, organized, and aggressive than their female counterparts.
This article suggests femcels (female incels) do exist. I suspect men still far outnumber them though.
- The “femcel” community is steadily gaining attention and membership.
- Like incels, femcels typically attribute their involuntary celibacy to their appearance.
- However, femcels appear to differ from incels in their emotions and coping mechanisms.
- Psychological differences between femcels and incels might be attributed to gender socialization.
I agree with both Atamasama and Jasmine
There are a large number of women who put up ‘comedy’ videos of them actually going up to random strange men in public places and saying ‘Hi! Would you like to come with me and have sex?’ In generaly, most men say yes and follow the woman with varying degrees of caution.
IMO a woman would have to have no redeeming qualities what so ever before she would have trouble finding men who would have sex with her.
BTW I remember the Edge- Armed Family is sadly the only recurring skit I remember. I know Wayne Knight was a cast member. I remember Julie Brown. I don’t remember anybody else.
The subreddit /r/nicegirls was always a place that showed what female incel behavior looked like. I don’t keep close tabs on the community and my gut feel is that it’s slowly being overtaken by extremists with a misogynistic agenda to push which is why I’m not linking it but go in there, judge for yourself and maybe look at some of the older posts (by sorting by top most posts and looking for ones from a few years back).
If we change it from sex to relationships then oh yes, there are quite a few female incels.
It featured Jennifer Aniston before Friends.
But that doesn’t really have anything to do with the incel movement. For one thing, incels seems to be looking for more shallow sexual encounters, or that seems to be what gets the most noise. For another, the “cel” part means “celibacy” which means not having sex.
So changing it from “sex” is changing it to something completely different than what it is.
As far as I can tell the differences are that the women who really, really hate men generally don’t want a relationship with a man; while incels do want a woman (as property). And that women tend to be more focused on paranoid fear of men than hatred of us.
Not really, no. Female on male violence is simply underreported.
I find that article short on details. I can see a femcel not getting the men she sees as top quality. I can see her as not getting men she feels are of the quality she deserves. I cannot see the overwhelming majority of women being unable to find a man willling to have sex with them.
My understanding is that the incel community was started by black women. Black women, on dating sites, get far fewer matches than other races of women.
I think the female equivalent of the male incel movement (the male incel movement is based on men who can’t get sex or relationships) is women who want meaningful relationships but can’t find them because guys only want sex, or guys pretend they want a monogamous relationship but they end up cheating constantly.
There are lots and lots of women who fall into that category and they are bitter just like the male incels.
I tend to agree. My only issues with sex are where, when, and with whom.
Then the use of ‘female incel’ and ‘femcel’ is wrong. What you described I can easily see being a problem for many women. However, if a woman can find a man willing to have sex with her she is NOT ‘involuntarily celibate’.
Also the incel movement among men is, to a large degree, a side effect of autism.
A link has been found between men who identify as being an “incel” and being autistic, in a major study.
Incels, which is a shortening of the term “involuntarily celibate”, are generally childless men in their 20s who are hostile to women.
They were found to be up to 30 times more likely to be autistic than the general population, according to the study published by the Commission for Countering Extremism (CCE), which advises ministers.
So it appears that autistic men do not have the social skills to succeed in the dating market.
Among femcels, I do not know if there is a correlation between mental health issues and being femcel.
Rule #34: There is porn of it. No exceptions.
Sometimes stated as, “If something exists, there is porn of it.”
Which supports the notion that there are some men, somewhere, who want to have sex with anything that exists.
To play Devil’s Advocate here, one common theme of what I’ve seen from the incel movement (not that I’ve spent any time in any actual discussions with them 
) is that they seek unattainable women. They all believe they are entitled to sleeping with supermodels and if they can’t get that, then it’s because women are shallow and only want “Chads”. (Yes, it’s extremely hypocritical.) One common criticism of the incel movement is that many of those men wouldn’t be incels if they had realistic expectations and treated women like real people.
So, women who are single because of having high expectations seems like the same thing, though those expectations might be less of a hang up on appearance than the male equivalent.
you and I generally don’t agree on much, but I think this is one thing we do. Both incels and the type of women in question here hate and feel contempt for the other sex. But in the case of incels, they still want them around for sex, child-rearing, and household duties. The extreme men-hating women on the other hand, would seem, by and large, to be content if men simply ceased to exist.
Interestingly, [from wiki] “The first website to use the term “incel” was “Alana’s Involuntary Celibacy Project”, founded in 1997 by a Canadian university student known only by her first name, Alana, to discuss her sexual inactivity with others”
NOT if you use the other definition of “celebate” meaning unmarried. I contend that the female equivalent is not being able to have a meaningful relationship which yes is being involuntary celebate (unmarried).
I cannot tell what you mean by this. It is possible you are just making a statement and should expect a lot of interesting personal messages and e-mails. It is possible this is sarcasm. In which case I should clarify, AIUI incels generally want sex. If they do want a long term relationship with a woman, it involves her being obedient and surbservient in every way. If femcels want sex, they can take some basic precautions for health and safety and go pick up a man. That man will likely not be what they want as a long term partner. But, they are not involuntarily celibate.
First Elon Musk claims any odd thing he does is due to autism/ Asperger’s and now this! As a man on the spectrum I want to say- Many of us do not hate women. It is sadly true that many of us do not understand social rules or signals. This makes things difficult for us. We ask that you treat us like Sheldon Cooper. It will make things easier for every one.
ETA
No. I find this to be a “There’s glory for you” argument. Yeah, that is technically correct. That is not what the term incel means. It is not the meaning most people think of. Another term should be found.