Do you think it’s true that some individuals have “gaydar, or do you think it’s a founding concept for an urban legend?”
Why is it that some individuals are better at identifying gays/lesbians than others, and overall, it appears that gays/lesbians are better at it than straight individuals?
Sure it’s easy to spot an effeminate man, or a real dicey, sexy butch. However, there are many people like myself that fly under the radar BIG TIME! I am approached predominately by men but thank God some women stand up and recognize I am a lesbian.
There was a professor at Harvard College who claimed to have studied the matter and found when volunteers quickly viewed a stranger with minimal information
from neck-up photos and videos, without jewelry or makeup-homosexual
men and women are more accurate in identifying other gays/lesbians. (Neither the viewers nor the videotaped volunteers knew the purpose of the study.)
This Professor believes that “gaydar” might have been “developed” to help gays/lesbians fulfill the need for affectionate relationships. (Is this a load of crap or what?) His theory also ran along the lines that gays/lesbians often face isolation, depression and anxiety, and gaydar is a coping mechanism.
There is no extra sense (how would it be passed on genetically?), but just better use by some people of their existing senses, i.e., they are more observant and pick up on the cues people give. There are all kinds of tells people have that give away who they are attracted to. In my experience, women tend to be sensitive to these (but not always), and gay men have developed observational skills to tell them who is on their team (but not always). It’s not really that supernatural.
I have known gay men who complain they have no gaydar… they have no idea who is gay and who isn’t. Maybe gaydar doesn’t work in places where fear has taught gay men to hide every aspect of their sexuality.
Imagine a tiger that can’t distinguish prey ? So I guess gayradar works best for those that need it… :dubious:
Well I know for sure that this hetero man has a bad gaydar and a bad girldar. I rarely detect that a woman is interested in me. So I guess a few gays probably suffer from this too. Its more about body language and perception.
Naturally I bet gays and lesbians “practice” their gaydar more and have had more chances to find out they were wrong or right on their assessment. So they get to “refine” and better tune their gaydar.
As for the OP… Gaydar doesn’t have to be a sense all by itself. I think it exists… but in the end its about evaluating body language.
I scored in the 94th percentile on that gaydar test. I also did better with women than with men, not surprisingly. If such a thing as gaydar exists, I evidently have it.
While it’s possible that this was meant as soley a play on the words, I think you still nailed it in substance, whether intentional or not. The “gaydar” works quite well when the person wants you to know that they are gay. It’s not so effective, even with the people who claim to “know for sure”, when there is no such indication on the target’s part.
I have plenty of friends who think they have excellent “gaydars”, but are almost exclusively wrong in their judgements. At the same time, we have plenty of friends who are secretly (to them) gay, and they haven’t the slightest idea, despite spending large amounts of time together.
So no, I don’t think there is a “gaydar”, but there are plenty of people who are perfectly fine helping you “sense” that they are gay.
First took it and scored less than 50% eaning y ;icks were actually worse than if I rando;y guessed. I did it again, and got a 75% score by siply picking the person I thought was guy, and then choosing the other one. I evidently have “anti-Gaydar.”
I didn’t do too well, and I thought this is something I’m okay at in real life. Anyway, it’s not a sense. You don’t pick up subsonic vibrations from gay people. (Do you?) It’s a judgment based on a combination of experiences, observation and stereotypes.
Like others have said, I doubt it’s so much being able to “sense the gay” than it is being observant of either a person’s stereotypical “gay” behavior or apparent attraction to a member of the same sex. If, given a picture of two similar-looking girls with the same haircut, clothing, makeup, etc., with one being straight and the other gay, it’s doubtful that anyone would really be able to distinguish between the two. In my experience at least, most people who brag about their amazing gaydar are the ones who have it the least; they see a stereotype of a gay person, recognize it, and then pat themselves on the back for their perceptiveness. My favorite example of this is my dad, who is, for the record, possibly the most homophobic person in the world. He’ll proudly point out and ridicule effeminate men, boasting about his better-than-average gaydar. This is made even more hilarious by the fact that he is completely oblivious to how incredibly gay he often seems to strangers (I could make an entire post about this. It’s beautiful.), and by the fact that he’s bragging about this to his less than entirely straight daughter. Gaydar? Nah.
70%, and better at spotting guys than girls. The only really reliable indicators I’ve ever found for identifying lesbians is either referring to some totally hot guy as “a handsome man” and also I’m pretty sure the ones who offer to lick my nethers are probably somewhat less than straight…
Ive heard the eye contact argument. Basically when 2 gay people look at each other they will hold their gaze a bit, while a straight guy will look away faster. This will also work for a potential hetro couple (hetro M and hetro F will hold their gaze longer towards each other). If a person is uninterested in that gender for a potential mate the tend to look away faster. Or so the theory goes.
The 6th is balance (detection of gravity or acceleration), not sure of the 7th.
The problem with this test is that ‘gaydar’ or any other quick stereotypicical judgement, relies greatly on other senses than sight.
I (straight female) used to hang out in gay bars with some best friend gay guys. I developed an almost perfect ‘gaydar’ - for guys, much poorer for gals. Because I hung with these guys, I knew what was ‘in’ in their group - music, clubs, slang, scent, moves restaurants, whatever - and these change with location in gay communities just as they do among straights. I KNEW what the local gay guy would be like - and more than once ‘outed’ guys I worked with by asking if they’d been to Oil Can Harry’s or Circus recently. (This was in the 70’ when being gay could get you fired, so I only did it when we were alone.)
What I’m saying is that ‘gaydar’ is just evaluating a bunch of clues - much like how people ‘know’ an American anywhere they go, no matter how much they try to ape the local culture.
However, there are many people like myself that fly under the radar BIG TIME! I am approached predominately by men but thank God some women stand up and recognize I am a lesbian.