I wasn’t sure whether to post this in MPSIMS or IMHO. On the one hand, it is Mundane and Pointless, and I’m definitely writing in part because I Must Share. However, I’m definitely asking for Opinions, so here goes:
The Setup
A few weeks ago, I attended a dance sponsored by my current university’s Indian association, and was lucky enough to find myself dancing with a rather cute girl. We danced for a while, and it certainly seemed that she was interested in me. Given my general lack of observational skills, I figured that this was a fairly important development. However, the night comes to an end, and, dragged by my brother, I leave the dance… without having gotten her name! (stupid stupid stupid).
Act Two
After agonizing for quite a while about my utter lack of, for want of a better term, balls at the dance, I found myself, inexplicably, with a second chance. Last weekend, the Indian association here put on a cultural program, and, being cultural, I attended. To my surprise, the girl from the dance was there - she was one of the stage hands (wearing form-fitting black clothes - did I mention that she was cute?). And, miraculously, she actually remembered who I was, or at least, recognized me and waved.
After the show, I went to the after-party (the Indian association also being filled with good partiers). And, as you probably guessed, saw her there. This time, I wasn’t quite so shy, and I found out her name. And that she was a sophomore here.
The Problem
I’m a first year grad student.
The Kicker
But I’m only 20. She is most likely around 6 months younger than I.
The Discussion
So I talked to one of my best friends about this. Her response was something along the lines of “You’re robbing the cradle, man.” When I noted the actual probable age difference, she said that the age wasn’t the important thing. I’m a grad student, having gone through my four years of undergrad life - I’ve had a lot more in the way of life experiences than she (the Girl) has. In that sense (according to my friend), we’re not at the same level, and that makes it vaguely creepy.
My response to this is that, my educational level notwithstanding, my age actually is fairly important. For example, I still can’t drink, can’t go to bars, etc. So one can’t consider my four years of college experience exactly the same as Joe Schmoe’s. I think that the closeness in age cancels out any possibly creepiness.
This led to a discussion of why exactly the grad-student/sophomore thing was creepy, in light of my age. Basically, it boiled down to “well, it’s counter to societal norms,” and that makes things bad. To which my response was: “So I basically have two options: date people that are my age, in which case the educational difference runs counter to societal norms, or date people who are also grad students, who range in age from 2-6 years older than I, which is also kinda weird - at least for me, since I haven’t had much dating experience.” Since my only options then, involve violating one norm or another, I chose to say “screw it” to norms in general.
The Question(s)
So my question to the teeming millions is really twofold:
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Do you think I have a shot with the Girl? After finding out her name, etc, I went to talk to a friend of mine for a while, and then was unable to find her, which means I don’t know when I’ll see her again (stupid stupid stupid).
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Given that I’ve already decided that I’m interested, is this weird/creepy? Recalling the fact that I’m probably TAing for some of her friends, etc, to put the educational gap in perspective.
I dunno, and so, I turn to all of you.
