An old man turned ninety-eight
He won the lottery and died the next day
–Alanis Morrisette
OK, so he was only 73. Same idea:
No, that just sucks.
[SOAPBOX ON]
What’s ironic is that Alanis Morissette has changed the meaning of the word.
Irony, according to Random House is:
- “a figure of speech in which the words express a meaning that is often the direct opposite of the intended meaning.”
- an outcome that’s the opposite of what was intended.
Instead, Morissette has taken random events – win the lottery, die the next day – and called them irony. In the song it’s closer to “sarcasm”:
“making a mockey of somehting or someone.”
It’s made Morissette high on the list of hated songwriters in this house. And strangely it angers my teenage daughter even more than I. Of course that could also be because all her songs sound alike.
[/SOAPBOX OFF]
Indeed.
The only thing “ironic” thing in her song is when she say’s “And yeah, I really do think”.
Urg, horrible, horrible woman.
It’s “artists” like her that make you want to jam white hot knitting needles into your ears.
Over-rated hack.
Technically you should be cheesed off at Glen Ballard, not really Alanis. Ballard ghosted most of that album.
Oh, I could care less.
Personally, I think it’s “ironical”. (Thanks, Celine Dion!)
Which was why I put ‘ironic’ in quotes.
Just to clarify things, I was referring to the resemblance of a real-life event to the song, “Ironic”, not suggesting that there was any actual irony going on. (I was hoping I wouldn’t need to spell it out.)
I thought everybody got the rant about the song’s misuse of the word out of their systems somewhere back in one of those years starting with ‘1’. But apparently not.
No, it’s artists like her that make me want to jam white hot knitting needles into her ears.
Personally, I think it’s “ironical”. (Thanks, Celine Dion!)
Thanks, Smeghead, for pointing that out. I hear that song everyday thanks to my wife playing that album and it never, ever gets less annoying.You just don’t understand her genius, manpig.
It’s good to see that Fark isn’t the only message board with a healthy contingent of the Irony Police.
Well, as I don’t particularly feel heated about the song at all, I’ll just use a cliched phrase, then: the story the OP referred to is another sad case of life imitating art.
The poor, poor guy. 
I agree. I think that song should be named “Isn’t it coincidental.” Or in some cases kind of gross…
“A black fly in your chardonnay, a death row pardon, two minutes too late. Isn’t it coincidental, don’t you think?”
It still doesn’t work as well as ironic, but you think she could at least have looked the word up in the dictionary.
[hijack]
Alanis’ song is almost as smart as Morphine’s “Good.” But not quite. What fucking genius thought this up:
*You’re good good good good
You’re good good good you’re good
Something tells me something tells me something tells me you can read my mind
Something tells me something tells me something tells me you can read my mind
yea
Full lyrics can be seen here.*
This song makes me want to poke my own eyes out in frustration.
[/hijack]
Mooney, your family needs a better dictionary.
Yeah, she’s a horrible woman - I know firsthand - but “ironic” has a wider definition than your cite. You also have dramatic irony and Socratic irony.
If we examine Ms. Morrissette’s lyrics we find that, in fact, she does describe a number of situations that may include a degree of irony. Examining each of her claims of irony:
1. Old man wins lottery and dies. This could be loosely construed as implying a degree of irony; the old man expected the lottery to bring riches, but instead he’s as dead as a stone. The irony would be clearer if Ms. Morrissette had clearly stated if the lottery led directly to the unnamed gentleman’s death, but it could have been ironic. Don’t you think?
2. Insect in beverage. Again, there is substantial implied irony here. Chardonay is closely identified with the best in consumer enjoyment - the sweet life, as it were. It is supposed to bring happiness and joie de vivre; instead, the luckless bon vivant is presented with a disgusting dead animal fouling his drink. Clearly, a dichotomoy between intended and actual results. A stronger case than #2, as this one has a strong elemtn of imagery that drives home a message of irony.
3. A governor’s pardon two minutes after being executed. I can’t make a case for irony here. There could be irony that goes unmentioned; for instance, perhaps the call was late because the governor did not know how to dial a phone, and did not have a secretary to do it for him, because the secretary had been murdered by the condemned prisoner. However, Ms. Morrissette fails to make such a case.
4. Rain on your wedding day. Tragic irony. A clear incongruity here between the expected and the actual result - again, strongly stated through imagery.
5. Paying for a free ride. There is clear irony here, dramatic irony; the unnamed protagonist has erred in paying for a ride that was, in fact, free. This is classic dramatic irony - the foolish passenger was unaware of what the audience was told, that the ride was in fact free.
6. Unheeded advice that turned out to be accurate. No case for irony here unless, again, there is a highly ironic backstory we are not privy to.
7. Man afraid of flying dies on plane trip. Probably irony here. Why did he take the plane trip? Clearly the crash was not the intended result. Of course, that technically means all plane crashes are ironic, so maybe not.
8. Being stuck in traffic when tardy. Not really ironic. Technically, any traffic jam that makes you late could constitute low-grade tragic irony, but there’s nothing terribly interesting or creative about this construction. Low-grade, one-dimensional irony, as it were.
9. Cigarette break is taken where smoking is prohibited. This seems incomplete, and is worded strangely. There could be irony here; for instance, if the only designated smoking area (“Your cigarette break”) has been posted with a No Smoking sign.
10. A plethora of spoons when a knife is needed. There is considerable irony of imagery here. Note that Morrissette does not say “a spoon when you need a knife,” but instead uses an enormous number of spoons, a quantity of spoons four orders of magnitude higher than the required number of knives. One envisions our luckless protagonist in some sort of flatware storage facility, desperately combing through box after box of spoons, spoons scattered about the floor and flying through the air, when all the luckless protagonist needs is a single knife. Surely there is clear irony when our star-crossed hero is possessed of such a staggering amount of flatware and yet does not have a single one of the one utensil he needs. The backstory practically writes itself. I’ll give Morrissette this one.
11. Meeting the perfect mate and finding they are married. Not really enough backstory or imagery here to construct a case for irony.
Overall I give her 5 out of 11. Eh, not bad; Britney probably thinks “ironic” is something you get in a multivitamin.
The genius manpig is Glen Ballard, right?
Please don’t post complete lyrics to a song. It’s in violation of our copyright rules.
Apply “fair use” wherever you can. Thanks.
Sorry, Coldfire - I plum forgot about copyrights.
Robot Devil: “Ah, how delightfully ironic!”
Bender: “That’s not ironic, it’s just mean.”