It was the best of cars, it was the worst of colours

You are offered a free car; a choice of two different free cars; in fact you may have:

  • The car of your dreams, in the colour you hate most of all
  • The car you hate most of all, in your favourite colour
  • No free car

Those are the options - there is no way to game the system by pretending you hate the colour, or car you actually love and vice versa; the hyperintelligent alien squid offering you this deal cannot be deceived. You don’t have to keep the car you are given - you can sell it or dispose of it in any way you like - but if you keep it, you are contractually bound not to respray it or in any other way change the colour - again, this part of the deal is immutable, because squid lords.

What is your choice?

  • Lovely car, horrible colour
  • Horrible car, best colour
  • No car
  • Something else, damn you squid lords!
0 voters

I get the great car in the awful color. But I won’t keep it. I’ll paint or wrap it nicely, sell it, then get a great car.

Hmm, this is a head-scratcher! My dream car would probably be an early-90’s Mercedes-Benz S-class (these can actually be had for a song, but it’s the upkeep that gets you). But if it were pepto-bismol pink, that does kind of spoil the “I love this car” aspect, and I wouldn’t want to keep it.

Now, you didn’t say I couldn’t repaint BEFORE selling. So let’s say the most expensive car, in any color you like – some kind of performance car, probably, don’t care, babyshit green will do – and I’ll just invest in repainting before selling for a tidy profit.

Looks like we found the same loophole.

I genuinely don’t care what color my car is. Pink, vomit green, plaid, doesn’t matter.

Car of my dreams, no loophole required. I can’t think of a color that I’d have such a visceral negative response to that I’d pass on a free dream car.

Another for great car, ugly paint.

Does the color have to be one that was/is actually available for that car, or is it any color that my disgusting imagination could dream up to hate?

It doesn’t really matter, my answer would be the same. If it’s a color so awful as to be unique, it would make the car easier to find in a parking lot. I would not, however, want a car that had an actual perfectly reflective mirror finish, but I feel safe because “mirror” is not a color.

Looks like you are going to be eaten by alien squid

No contest. A car I hate is going to be a car that sucks to drive and always has problems. A color I hate is just going to be one I don’t like looking at—something I don’t have to actually do all that often.

It doesn’t have to be an official colour that is available the car will be supplied in the exact colour that you love/hate

The only way a car’s appearance would be so embarrassing that I’d refuse to accept a free one is if it’s all covered in like goofy anime shit.

That car, I would not drive unless I was paid a substantial sum.

One other note: a color that I would find hateful on a car may not be one that I would find hateful in other objects, and vice versa. So it would be interesting (to me) to find out what color the squid lord would come up with.

I’d personally take the car I hate in the colour I love, because the car I hate most is way more valuable than any car I actually like, and the colour I like best would make it really desirable for resale.

I think a paradox would be created because I think I would actually want a color in the worst color imaginable (to me). Partially because I don’t think I consciously know what that is and am curious to find out.

That would make the color interesting to me and therefore not the color I hate most of all and then I think the squid’s head would explode.

Cybertruck in bubblegum pink then?

That crosses right over the uncanny valley of uncool, and becomes actually cool.

Metallic Cadbury’s purple, but yeah, Cybertruck is probably as good a candidate for my most hated car as any

To me a vehicle is a tool. Yes, in many ways I’d prefer a pretty-to-me tool, but as my late spouse used to say I am ruthlessly practical. A good vehicle in an ugly paint job it is.

I’d say it goes deep into the valley of cringe, cuts down some trees, builds a cabin and settles there to raise a family.