Update: Highways are still closed to the north and east of us with mega-car-pile-ups and really shitty conditions, the airport shut down, and power off for about an hour and a half tonight. Stupid storm.
People on facebook who put ‘lol’ at the end of pretty much every sentence - seemingly instead of a full stop - need stabbing.
Your sentence has far too many qualifiers - here, let me help:
People on facebook . . . need stabbing.
There - that’s better!
Really? Is this where we are going to go now, mr. passionate crybaby co-worker?
So you lose the battle you so passionately yelled at me about - so now you focus on the TITLE of a document you see on a list that hasn’t even been written yet? A title that is merely used as a placeholder?
And rather than coming to me to ask me about it - you actually send an email to my boss with this whole expository paragraph about what this document title should be - when you don’t even know what we are focusing on - just so that you can get some litte victory?
Do you not realize that my boss and I, just 5 minutes ago, were rolling our eyes about your email. Is this really what you focus on all day? No wonder everyone complains about your department. Stop focusing on what everyone else is doing ‘wrong’ and do your frakking job. Y’know - the one you usually refuse to do!
Bitch, you caught the Fridayitis again?!
To myself:
Stop locking your keys in the fucking car, asshole! I don’t care how absent-minded you are, friggin’ stop it already!
STOP HANGING OVER MY SHOULDER WHEN YOU WANT ME TO DO SOMETHING. Just send me a damned email with the decks you want me to pull pages from, and note for each of which pages to use. There’s no need for you to physically be here, and I fucking hate having people look over my shoulder while I work.
I pit the world at large (nobody specifically),
Please kindly go away and explode already. I am never going to understand, much less appreciate, your idea of normal. I don’t want anything to do with it, or you.
Please, just return to primordial ooze and leave me the frak alone. In the interest of peace, naturally.
This is why I now always have two sets of house & car keys - one on my key chain for regular use, and one in a key case in my pocket for when I stupidly forget/lock in the regular set.
Yeah, I’ve got a spare key at home that I’m going to start carrying. I’ve had to call AAA three times since November to come unlock my truck, and it’s annoying as hell.
Dear Management,
If retroactively QA’ing a feature after a release has gone out the door ever actually worked, we wouldn’t need the QA department in the first place.
Jesus Christ people! Can’t you start s new thread every month? Slogging through eleventy hundred comments is getting on my nerves.
Pfft, who reads what other people post here? I just come in here to vent.
Hey, I did it last times. Someone else’s turn. 
Look you,
Get up off your behind and stop whining. <Enter task here> does not do itself, and eating Hershey’s anything reading the whole farking internet will not get it done any faster.
Also, use the new keyboard you spent $20 on rush shipping for, halfwit.
And don’t use half of the expensive <enter whatever it is here> inside of a month when it should last far longer.
ARGH.
Okay.
Fuck you free wireless at O’Hare. You don’t work…at all. Sure my laptop connects just fine, but then it never loads your stupid fucking login page. Why do you even need that? What purpose does it serve? Other than not let me use the Internet on my laptop while waitin for my flight. At first I thought it was my laptop, cause I saw other people seemingly browse the web, but my phone won’t load the stupid login page either! (I am forced to post this just using my cell data plan.)
which brings me to my next rant…Fuck you AT&T for not allowing tethering on the iPhone. AFAIK you let every other smartphone that uses your network do it, and Apple finally caved last year and acivated it on their end, so whopee people in other countries or who hack their phone can do it, but not us schlubs who just have a regular phone with regular service.
You know, Car, I’m one week from my Bankruptcy hearing. Now is not the time for me to have to take you into the shop. Bastard piece of shit car.
Mondayitis too? Maybe you’ll die.
Just to say, this was only directed at me, as I was being a rare form of dumb that week. (I’m sorry if someone else thought they were being pitted, and got hurt.)