We recently moved into a nice two family house. It was empty when we first got here as the owner was renovating to sell. And sell it she did to a nice family with small three children. The oldest daughter is nine and seems nice enough except. . …
She tries our lock when she thinks no one is here. How do I know? Because I was here on two occasions when she did it. A couple of doctor’s appointments had me home very early. At first I thought it was one of my kids coming in. There was that faint metally jiggering sound and the cats zoomed over to the door so that they could be the first to haughtily ignore whoever it was who walked in. Only nobody walked in.
Two days later (yesterday actually), the same thing happened only this time I heard Mom yelling “Come down here right now! How many times do I have to tell you not to play up there?”
Now, I’ve thought of doing some evil things to the girl, only they’re too evil to do to a curious nine year old. Like the classic pale full of paint over the door and the not-so-classic and possibly illegal tazered doorknob. I’m leaning towards just leaving it unlocked and standing naked by the door covered in fake blood while holding a butcher knife.
:eek: Even for a nine year old, she should know better. All her mother sais is ‘get down from there’? Where’s the punishment??
I’d suggest you’d go to the landlord and tell her what you’ve just told us. I think maybe then she’ll go into proper action.
I think the girl thinks since her mom is the landlord, and although it’s your appartment, that she could get away with that.
My mom’s next door neighbor tops that…he’ll come inside, walk upstairs, and go to the kitchen for a snack. He can’t be older than 7, but he should still know better. The first time, my mom was expecting someone anyways, so when she heard someone walking upstairs, she figured it was her friend. She sauntered upstairs eventually, and found the kid sitting in the kitchen eating a banana. The second time, I was staying over, and was upstairs asleep. I heard someone walking downstairs, freaked out, went down with a vase ready to beat the shit out of someone, and found him sitting in the living room, watching cartoons. She’s talked to his mom about it, and he’s stopped since then, but about a week ago, someone opened the door and set off her alarm while she was at work. When the police showed up, they found the door wide open, locked. The theory is that she didn’t close it all the way, but armed it, and the kid tried to come in. That would bug the hell out of me.
Try this - next time she’s doing that, yank the door open and (in as Satanic a voice as possible) yell “what the hell are you doing here?” If you do it right, you should actually be able to see her shit herself as she’s running down the hall.
There is a really, really cheap, battery-powered “burglar alarm” we bought at a hardware store. It’s about the size of a pack of cigarettes (wow, as a non-smoker that’s the first time I’ve used that decription!). It attaches to the top of the door and as long as the door isclosed, all is quiet. Open the door, which allows this tab-thing to stickup and it goes “WAAAAAAAAAAH!” like a cheap, battery-powered fire alarm.
It’s only for when you’re home – you turn it on by a little switch under the WAH-speaker. Come home early, turn on the alarm and leave the door unlocked. If she opens the door – WAAAAAAAAAAAAAH – it may startle her enough/embarass her enough that she won’t try it again.
The poor Mom has a 16 month old and a 4 month old, piles and piles of boxes still to deal with and a hunky husband she’s gotta keep her eye on so I don’t want to bother her with this-- yet. She is trying to keep the girl downstairs.
I agree with you 5U1C1D3 that she thinks this is “her house”. It reminds me of my daughter when she was a bit younger than 9. She wanted her own house or, as she described it, a house where “all the windows belonged to me.”
My neighborhood is crime free. I enter & exit my house through a door between the game room and the carport. The door doesn’t have a real lock, so I use a padlock, which is a pain in the butt. I’d like to be able to leave the door unlocked when I leave for short periods of time, but I can’t because the neighborhood children will come in the house. Children from 3 families have done this on multiple occasions, despite my warnings and threats from their parents. One parent actually said it was my fault for not locking my door. The kids incriminate themselves – either someone else tells on them, or they leave glasses or candy wrappers lying around. One time one of them let the dog out, which they know is a HUGE offense.
I like the kids and they are generally welcome in my home, but when they’re here, they show no sense of propriety. They’ll bring 3 or 4 of their friends in without asking me. They go in rooms that they know are forbidden to them. I always have juice boxes and snacks for them, but they go into the refrigerator and cupboards and help themselves to anything.
One winter day my nieces and a bunch of neighbor kids were here. I lay down for a nap. When I awoke, I thought “gee, it’s cold in here.” There are five doors to the outside, and every single one of them was wide open.
My point: kids are stupid. I love 'em, but they’re stupid. I suspect they are deaf as well.
At a certain point, if the kid repeatedly entered my house or apartment, I would be pressing charges of Trespassing.
Yeah, it’s a hassle, possibly over-reacting and nothing really would happen. But it might convince the kid’s parents that you are serious.
Back in 1981 when I was in my very first apartment, we didn’t think to lock the door much when we were home. Then the kid from the apartment just below ours acquired the bad habit of walking up the wrong floor and walking right in on us.
That stopped the day I jumped off the couch screaming bloody murder and charged him. Scared the living shit out of him and he fled. He made a lot more effort NOT to walk in the wrong apartment after that.
lainaf, I have to wonder how much you’ve encouraged that behavior. I mean, I would never have just walked in to a neighbor’s house. Heck, my best friend lived down the street and I always knocked on the door and waited to be let in.
Do you let these children just walk in when you’re home? Or do they have to ring the bell and wait for you to open the door for them? When they are at your place, do you let them go to the fridge and help themselves to the juice boxes, or do you make them ask you and you get them? Seems to me there might be some behavior patterns that are at odds.
Back in college I took part in a work study program, where I rented a room out of a house with a lady and her two sons. They had a very relaxed attitude and the neighbor girl and friends could saunter in and out. Seems to me this breeds familiarity with the facilities. While it may be appropriate with adults and teenagers whom you trust, it is probably not a good situation for younger children who have yet to establish concepts of proper behavior.
Biggirl’s problem seems to be slightly different. Sounds like this girl doesn’t recognize the idea that part of the house is hers and part is not. She needs a good lecturing. I would suggest going to her parents and informing them of the problem, and then you and her parents discussing it with the girl herself.
Of course scaring the shit out of her also has its appeal.
Just tell the mom. It doesn’t have to be threatening or angry or anything.
Or if you feel more direct, tell the girl yourself that this is inappropriate. Again, doesn’t have to be angry or anything, just stern and uncompromising.
Yeah, the girl should know, but she doesn’t. A few sentences to one lady or the other will fix everything.
Hey Biggirl You should try some very very evil plots that will emotionaly scar this child. Paint and blood are a good start, but waiting until she plays with the lock, then fling the door open, drag her inside and toss her in a closet upside down and ducked taped. WHile she’s in the closet, make her think you are going to eat her. After a day or so let her out, and she’ll NEVER come near you again.
Sure you’d have to move and change your name, but that kid will never mess with another lock again, and really we really need to teach her the right way. It takes a whole village…
I think just snatching the door open when she’s jiggling the knob will probably scare her enough. It would be even better, though, if you can have something in your hand like a hammer–“Lord, child, I thought a burglar was trying to break in! It’s a good thing I saw it was you, I almost bashed your head in!”
I also like Geobabe’s idea. Make sure you go over the top with the tone of “I’m so relieved you’re my neighbor’s kid and not a real burglar,” to show you’re upset, but not angry at them. You want the kid to learn that she did something wrong; you don’t want the kid crying to her mommy your landlord that you were threatening her.
I think you should open the door next time you hear it and ask her what she’s doing? wait for her to answer. then go from there, explain to her it’s wrong.
If it happens again remove the screws from the door knob and let her pull the handle off. Let’s see if she can explain that one.
