Pretty original title eh? I’ve got to blow off a shit load of steam and maybe ya’ll can help me.
It’s the last week before finals and I’m working my ass off on a group presentation in a quite corner in the library. I notice that this guy has been staring at me as long as I’ve been there (which was at least a good half an hour). So I get up to go to the facilities and relieve myself of the Nutrageous bar that I had eaten earlier that day. I notice the guy keeps staring while I make my way into the restroom. About 1 minute after I get into the restroom I hear someone come in. No big deal. I mean it’s a friggin’ public restroom in a University libray for fucks sake. This is where everything took quite possibly the hugest fucking nosedive in existence and completely fucked me up. He starts to masturbate. I’m thinking ok this is weird I’m just gonna leave and go somewhere else. Before I can finish the guy stands up and starts to masturbate in front of my stall trapping me inside. Now I can’t see the guy doing it but I can definately hear him. I also see the guys arm moving in the motion like he is jacking off. So now I can’t get out of my stall unless I wanna see this guy jacking off. He finally finishes. I figure thank god I can leave. I get out of the restroom and the guy starts staring at me again. I know this is the guy. You wanna know why? He was wearing the same shoes and pants. So I go call the University police figuring they will at least do something to this guy. You wanna know what they did? Absolutely fucking nothing. The cop told me well since you didn’t see him masturbating and just “heard” him there is nothing we can do. Honestly how in the fuck can I confuse hearing a guy masturbate for say whiping his shirt for a few fucking minutes? I’m passed the point of being upset. I want blood.
So where do I go from here? Should I lodge a complaint against the University police? Better yet should I seek legal action since they weren’t willing to even fucking question the guy that did it?
I’m warning you right now if you don’t want to see vile language turn your head and scroll down. This is for you Mr. I can masturbate and scare the shit out of this kid. I’m fucking 19 years old I didn’t know if this guy was gonna try and rape me or what? You know what buddy? I hope for the sake of everything holy that you get castrated. And not just a simple snip either. I’m talking about smashing your fucking sexual herassing ass testicles with a red hot fucking hammer. You are a worthless piece of shit that would be best to fucking leave this world. I hope someone bends your ass over and anal rapes you over and over again. You think it’s fun to sexually herass me? Think again numbnuts I hope (of course this is after the anal raping and red hot hammer) that you get mounted by a pack of rabid fucking wolverines. May your life be filled with shit for doing this to me. Because of you I can’t go back into that library. I honestly fucking hate this guy. I’ve never said before but now I can say it with no qualms that in fact I do hate your.
I am still very sorry for all that has happened. You have every right to hate that person as anyone would in that same situation. There are people out there that do care about you (sometimes we arent great about expressing ones feelings in cituations like this because we are just as worried and lost for words at that time as you are). Anyway I guess that is enough on that and let this get back to being a “pit” thread
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Now for the bashing…I think that guy should rot in hell for what he did. He is a fucking freak who has a real fucking problem and really really needs to get some fucking help instead of freaking out other people in bathrooms and computer labs. The police should fucking do something about this guy who has been reported more than once before someone gets hurt! What is up with todays legal system…do they fucking not care about everyones wellbeing and safety on a college campus (hell anywhere for that matter). Ah well maybe they its something that will pass or think thats its not a serious matter unless the person was “phyically” vandelized I dont know but the system fucking sucks!
Tiki, what happened to you was serious. Whatever the insane legal system might say, that would terrify anyone. I can’t imagine what it would be like, and I don’t want to.
I suggest finding someone to talk to about this, who has some experience in the field of abuse counseling. I don’t think it would be an overreaction.
I’m going to the local counseling center tomorrow and venting to them. I’m almost as pissed at the cops as I am the nutbag that did this. And manservant that sounds like one hell of an idea. In fact I’ll start with the library tomorrow. I hate to say this but I hope it makes its way to the papers. That way this backwards university will take charge so shit like this doesn’t happen ever again.
Yeah thing is the cops said since I didn’t see his face while I was in the restroom it doesn’t matter. What a stinky crock of bull shit! I can guarentee for a fact it was this guy. Anyways I’m already devising a plan to either get things straightened out at this school OR to blow this out into the open so everyone will know.
If the university people won’t do anything, I’d sure as hell get someone to draw up some flyers with a warning that this guy is a perverted stalker and a possible threat and post 'em around campus. Real sneaky like.
I can’t believe the campus cops didn’t do anything. Mine would be all over this.
Ugh…I’m disgusted. Half with the idiot perv who did this in the first place and half with myself.
When I first read the OP, I kicked into a reflex mode of thought that’s a remnant from my PC/storm the admin/we’re here, we’re queer, etc… days from college, and that was: “Blame the Straight Guy”. For over-reacting to a harmless offer of sex. [sub]Don’t explode yet! There’s more![/sub]
Then, five minutes later, I realize what I just thought. And I think to myself “What if this were a female student who’d been followed back into the stacks by someone who stood on the other side of the reach-through shelf and masturbated? Or had masturbated in the other half of a carrel that the female student was studying at?”
So I’m disgusted with myself for not taking the OP seriously enough from the first time I read it. I was blinded by my own version of PC.
Tiki God, go to the counseling center. Tell them you had what was basically a flasher experience. Make a stink. I have to warn you though, you’ll drown in PC backlash. That’s likely to be what’s keeping the campus cops from doing anything, also. Don’t do what I did and let yourself begin to think it doesn’t matter because it was a guy. Don’t let them drown you in PC and accuse you of homophobia.
And thank you for posting this. Because I didn’t know I still had that pocket of condescension and double-standard in my makeup and you forced me to pull it out, examine it, and throw it away.
jayjay (and yes, to those who are rubbing their chins and narrowing their eyes, there are other reasons I tried to belittle Tiki God’s reaction to a restroom solicitation away, but those reasons are harder to get rid of than the PC thing and we’re not getting into that here …)
Oh! I am horrified that happened to you. How REVOLTING!
I would want to hunt the dude down and shoot him (not suggesting you do that, or anything). I know (well, I mean, I can’t, but it’s hard to phrase it otherwise) how creeped out you must be. Things like that can really give you the eternal creeps. You really need to go vent to a counselor.
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I had an experience that was NO WAY as bad as that, but it was still so creepy… One time when I was in college and riding around town doing errands with my Mom, this guy in a blue car started following us. He followed us no matter where we went. He was looking at me, and watching me. Finally we stopped at this one place to make some copies, and when I walked from the car to the store he followed me in his car and watched me. There were people around. I know I shouldn’t have gotten out of the car but hey, I was dumb. Anyway, I got back in the car and he took right back up following us. So we drove to the police station and he went on his way. I mean, what could I do? I didn’t have his tag number, not a great description of the guy, since I wasn’t exactly looking at him, and he didn’t do anything to be arrested for, except damage MY SANITY!!!
I got really creeped out by guys after that, and just stopped dating for about a year. I mean, I didn’t want them around me much at all, even socially. It really creeped me out. Fortunately I never saw the guy again.
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The point of the whole thing that I’m writing is that you should see a counselor other that for your anger, because stuff like this can totally damage you mentally.
Fuck, that is fucking vile!!! Dirty perverted bastard! Everyone here is right tikki you need to kick up a stink about this, (although I can see you want to do that, good for you) people like that shoulden’t be allowed to be on campus with normal people.
Something sort of similar (not as bad) happened to me in a public toilet in Inverness. I went in, and there was this fat stinky guy standing in a stall having a pee with the door open (I’m female btw). I was a bit taken aback, but thought, he’s probably not realised it’s the ladies and will leave as soon as he does. Anyway, I peeked out of the door of my stall when I was finished to make sure he was gone, and there he is washing his hands. The thought of going out while he was there was pretty creepy so I stayed in the stall thinking he would go away, but no, he just kept washing his hands over and over again while looking in the mirror. So I went out and told the staff, they went down and got him out and I thought “good thats him gone, dirty bastard”. A few minutes later, I get up to leave and there he is, sitting drinking his tea! I should have asked why they didn’t chuck the pervert out but I left it.
Anyway, the point of this story is, that if he had been masturbating while I was there it would have freaked me out even more, and it’s no different for you, so kick up a stink tikki as big as you possibly can!
eirroc, and anyone else who walks into a ladies’ bathroom and finds a creepy man inside:
TRUST YOUR INSTINCTS. DO NOT GO INTO A STALL WHERE YOU COULD BE TRAPPED. LEAVE THE BATHROOM, TELL SOMEONE, DON’T GO IN THERE.
When situations are just “Off” like that, listen to your instincts and don’t go in there. If someone is dangerous, you don’t want to be in that bathroom with them. I say this because in my former office building in D.C., a woman was raped in the elevator. When the rapist got on the elevator, he was wearing only one shoe and talking to himself. Is that someone you’d want to be trapped in a small space with? No! Get out!
Tiki God, you couldn’t have known he was going to follow you in, and a man in a man’s bathroom is not out of place, so I don’t want you to think the above was directed at you. I’m sorry you had to deal with that, and I understand your anger at the authorities. My old roommate and I used to have a guy who would masturbate outside the windows of our ground floor apartment. The cops never did anything about him. One day she snuck up under the open window and pepper-sprayed his exposed dick. He never came back.
Although I don’t know you, Tikigod, I want to suggest that (assuming you are not a young Apollo) this guy was probably not overwhelmed by your beauty into acting out of charecter–in other words, he has probably done this before and will do this again. The library will DEFINITLY want to know, and even if they can’t take legal action against this guy at this time, they can be on the lookout for him. Libraries attract creeps for some reason–our University library has flashers in the stacks every few years, for one. We also had a problem with two guys coming in to watch porn for 12 hour streches on the public terminals. While they didn’t jerk off there, they weren’t housebroken. This was a problem.
When you go talk to the library guys, I would take a “I want to help you all catch this guy and get, at the least, a restraining order against him”, not “Why didn’t you assholes do something, I am thinking about sueing” attitude. Administrators get very very nervous at the slightest wiff of a lawsuit, esp. a sex-related one. And honsetly, it is not thier fault they didn’t notice the guy following you into the restroom–as you said, it is a pretty normal thing, man goes into man’s restroom. But they will want to prevent this from happening agian, and should be glad you brought it to thier attention (many people wouldn’t, which perpetuates the problem).
Tiki, I have read this thread several times, and I really don’t have anything to add except: that SUCKS!
I’d give you a hug, but I suspect that’s against the rules in the Pit…
I (in my fantasy life which runs in my head all the time, but has little or no relation to reality) would have kicked that stall door open, presumably whacking him GOOD in the pee-pee! (But that may not be a good idea either, you never know what will happen then!)
Please realize (as I’m sure you do) that not all men are creepy fuckwad assholes. Some of us are just plain old regular assholes… or plain old regular fuckwads… or just plain and old!
Tiki - I only suggest this if you are 110% positive the guy you saw in the library was the same guy in the bathroom. I don’t usually advocate lying, but if the cops aren’t going to do anything about it because you didn’t actually see his face in the bathroom, lie and say that you did.
My bestfriend’s ex started out the same way as this guy and until people like this get caught and put into counseling, things usually get progressively worse and more dangerous.
Be cautious, but don’t give him the power of keeping you from the library. If he is there again, as bad as it may feel, don’t let him know he is intimidating you (this is what he wants). Glare right back and let it be known that you are the one with power over him. Power to have him arrested, embarrassed, or even kicked out of school.
Tiki, that is NASTY, and I am sorry you had to endure that. No one should have to endure that kind of harassment, and that the school didn’t do something about it because you couldn’t see it(like you would want to) is heinous.
Geez, I was just washing my hands! Vigorously. You wish I was masturbating!
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Okay, seriously, you’ve gotten some good advice from the previous posters. Talk to the administation and make sure something is done. If this guy has done it to you, he’s done it to others.
