This is exactly what happened to my fiancee in my post above, except it was some little shop downtown where she bought a cellphone charger (no jokes, please).
The funny thing was that the shop is part of a big hotel complex and many of the smaller shops don’t show up on statements as “Specific Shopname”, instead, charges show up as quite uselessly as: “Swanky Hotel Center”. So her bank statement looked like she’d paid for a few nights at the Swanky Hotel …:dubious:
We thought that aspect was funny, but I’d hate to be the guy with a joint account and a jealous wife if a similar thing happened.
See my above post. The fact that the company that was ripping people off had a debit system that did not specify the actual store name was part of what added to our initial confusion. The bank had more detailed (or perhaps more understandable/traceable) information that what appeared on my girlfriend’s statement (plus, other fraudulent transactions had been reported by other people too).
If your receipt says Ratbastards 'R Us, but your bank statements has the debit transaction as Swanky Center Store No. 8475-2, things don’t match up so great.
Seems pretty rare for that to happen and in either case, joint or separate, the best thing you can do is keep a close eye on things. Hopefully she caught the fraud quickly.
No kidding. I think what made the culprits theink they could get away with it, is that the Swanky Hotel Center is in the heart of the financial district. So there are thousands of people rushing around there daily using corporate credit cards and expense accounts and such. So if a business person had been travelling on business and his/her business accountant saw Swanky Hotel Center - $460, the expense might be assumed as being incurred from eating a sandwich from the mini-bar in the hotel room.
The vague store name doesn’t seem all that unusual here. I noticed something similar when I bought Sushi from a place at the bottom of Fancy Law Building. My printed receipt said: “Sushi Yum Yum”, but the debit statement said “Fancy Law Building SYY” (or some equally whacked combination). Yet another place in the same center had the full business name “Overpriced Running Gear”. So it seems inconsistently applied. I don’t know if some shops use some kind of third-party card processor or what, but it’s annoying.
And yes, she caught it right away. The amount was not something that would probably be noticed quickly on the expense account of an investment banker (where $200 would be a business lunch), but we’re not big spenders. When she got her statement, it practically lept off the page and bit her on the nose.
The spouse and I, for a long time, had only our joint account. It was never an issue. If I wanted to make a big purchase I asked him if he minded, and he did the same for me. If we had the spare money to do it, we did it. If not, we didn’t. That worked for us for many years.
Eventually we got in a better space financially and decided that, in addition to our joint account, we’d each take $X every month and start personal accounts. This has worked out fantastically for us–he likes to donate to a lot of charities that I don’t necessarily agree with (religious-based stuff and whatnot), and this way he’s free to do that without getting me involved. I’m much more likely to save up until I get a big pile of money and then splurge on something expensive and frivolous (like a Kindle, a laptop, or a mount for my WoW character) and that way I don’t feel guilty about it.
I can honestly say we’ve never had even the hint of a trust issue about money. Both of our checks go into the joint account and all the bills are paid out of that (usually I’m the one who does it, just because it worked out that way). We have no kids and don’t want any, so aside from expenses/bills, keeping a comfortable amount socked away for emergencies, and taking care of our cats, we don’t spend that much money. It helps that our incomes are similar–he makes more than I do (he’s an engineer, I’m a tech writer), but not by enough that it’s worth being concerned about. It all goes into the kitty and becomes “our” money.
I realize this approach won’t work for everybody, but as it happens we’ve both got fairly similar philosophies about money so it works well for us.
I review transactions looking for patterns - we are habitual people, so it really isn’t very hard to figure out that the charge to the gas station on the corner every six days or so is his. Or the charge to the restaurant by his work. When something unusual comes up, I ask. I am, however, not terribly anal about such things and don’t balance my checkbook (what checkbook? - its almost all cash card charges). So this “one account” thing works for us now, as the multiple account thing did earlier.
For us, it’s really not that difficult. Obviously, I know what my own charges are.
After having been married for a while I know where my wife shops, so I know almost all of the charges on the bill that come from her just by looking at the name of the store. That usually leaves maybe one charge per month that I’m not sure about, and often not even that. So I just ask her to confirm that she did make the mysterious charge.
From then on, if that item ever appears again, it’s no longer mysterious. So the number of mysterious charges gets fewer and fewer as time goes on.
Basically, we’re both creatures of habit. When we’re apart we lead very humdrum lives, so our charges are very predictable.
My husband and I had some pretty significant relationship issues prior to getting married, mostly due to money. Once we married, we committed to separating our finances for the most part. It is the best decision we ever made.
We have one joint account, into which I deposit my share of the monthly bills. We pool our funds – how much we contribute is based on a percentage of income, so if for some reason I get a reduced paycheck, I owe less money to the joint account that month and vice-versa. This means the breadwinner (which is currently me, but will eventually be him) has to put out a little more. He makes sure that all joint expenses–insurance, rent, utilities, etc are taken care of. We also put some of that joint money into a joint savings account we have designated for specific joint expenses – car repair or vacation money, for example.
We also each have individual checking, savings, and investment accounts, and we almost never share what’s going on with those because it doesn’t really matter. The point of them being separate is that we can do whatever we like with that money. I use my checking account for groceries, commuter train fare, and extra purchases. I have two different savings accounts which I have for my own private use… earlier this year I used some of those funds to purchase a new computer, and he couldn’t say boo about it. The separate accounts thing works wonders for us, because I am very spendy and prone to impulse purchases, and he is extremely frugal, the sort of person who will calculate which can of corn is really the better value based on price per pound. If we had to consult each other for every single purchase, we would destroy one another.
I think whether you go joint or separate or both is really dependent on the relationship, but when you have two vastly different spending styles but people who essentially have the same financial goals, our way works very well.
We have four accounts. Each of us has an account that we had before we got married. Then she had an account in another credit union that we added my name to. I then got an account at the same credit union and added her name. It works like this. The two accounts that are ours have only one name on it. We can do whatever we want with it. One account is only for paying bills, I do most of that. The other account is our joint spending account so we can go shopping, gas, food whatever. We tried to have only three, but the checks kept putting us close to or over the edge if we spent a bit too much at Target. Now that can’t happen.
I do everything online as well. You are correct that I generally don’t check my statements against receipts. I just want to know that they are genuine and to keep rough track of them.
Also, both my wife and I are fairly busy professional types who have many interests and hobbies. We often have lots of odd charges for stuff.
But yeah, to my mind seperate is simply more convenient for keeping track of stuff.
I suppose thinking about it maybe part of the difference is that if you are working in a professional/business capacity, you are already used to having multiple accounts - having seperate accounts seems a mere bagatelle.
Even for personal stuff, we have several different savings accounts at various institutions - to ensure all are covered by Canadian gov’t deposit insurance.
