I put my Grundig YB400 shortwave on Craigslist for $50. Some guy calls and yes, he’s interested and will come over in an hour to buy it. Great. Easy peasy sale and I don’t have to fuck with eBay and their fees. So the guy shows up and he’s at least ten years older than me, which puts him in his 70s somewhere. And he loves to hear himself talk. Okay, people get lonely and my time isn’t so valuable I can’t listen for a bit. But the story keeps on going, all about his friend who was a fellow ham operator (are there any people weirder than ham enthusiasts?), and who he gave a Jesus tract to (alarm bell goes off in my head) and who then left him all his ham gear which he sold for $12,000 and blahblahblah. And oh by the way, I see you have Halloween decorations on your house and are you planning to put up Christmas decorations, and shouldn’t that be a Nativity, since that’s what it’s really all about (klaxon horn blaring in my head). Verbal cues about turning the conversation to the radio failed completely, as did my increasingly hostile body language. All I could do was sit and hope that he ran out of gas. After about 15 minutes, he finally whips out a $50 bill, checks to see that the radio actually works, and departs.
Look dude: I don’t care if you’re a Christian and I don’t care about your god. I don’t care about your hints that my halloween decorations are somewhat satanic. I certainly don’t care about your pointed recommendation that we put a nativity in the front yard for Xmas. What I do care about is your presumption that you can just start lecturing strangers because you’re part of the god squad. I just want to sell this radio and get you out of my house before the red haze comes and I hack you to pieces with a bread knife. Fuckin’ weirdos. . .
I might’ve thought, “Screw the $50” and started really fucking with the guy in return, invoking the Invisible Pink Unicorn and the Flying Spaghetti Monster and all of them.
In my head.
In reality, I probably woulda sat there politely and "mm-hmm"ed for a while until I got my money and he went away. Because girls are socialized to be polite, and because it seems dangerous to piss off a stranger who’s already in my home.
But in my head, I’d have told him all kinds of shit.
Reach into your pocket for your cellphone, and hit the button to dial your landline. When it rings, excuse yourself, pick up and then invent an urgent errand you need to get to.
We deliver meals to old people, so we’re used to listening to rambling conversations from confused folks, while subtley inching toward the door. This guy was not to be derailed, even by placing giant logs and rocks on the tracks and wearing bandanas on our faces. In retrospect, when he said “I’m a Christian”, I should have responded “I’m a satanist”. But I really wanted that $50. Filthy lucre!! ::shakes fist::
Its one thing to do what you suggest, its another to have to bear listening to what the OP is describing WRT religious bullshit. Its hard to discuss such topics rationally here on the Dope or with friends/family, but with complete strangers? Fuck that.
ETA: I just realized the irony of my last sentence, yes. Ah well. I don’t consider fellow Dopers to be complete strangers, just partial ones, so there!
I would posit that SWLs at this point in history are waaay likelier to be crazy-ass religious types than the general population, because crazy-ass religious stations about the only real programming left on SW. The innertoobz have kicked its butt right into the gutter of history, contentwise.
Big fucking boo-hoo. What makes you think he’s lonely? He’s an active ham operator, and I’ve never met one who didn’t belong to some sort of club or organization. He’s also a self-styled Christian, and they roam in mobs like zombies, IME. I don’t like being preached at by people like him, or moralized by people like you.
Proving once again that the love of money is the root of all evil.
I think if we really tried, we could come up with a better nativity scene than that one - people rarely get in my face about religion, so I have no impetus to put “nativity” scenes on my front lawn, but after a conversation like that one, Chefguy, I wouldn’t be putting the halloween decorations away too soon - I think a giant black spider in the crib could be a very nice touch. Maybe a cluster of skeletons looking on…
You sound hostile. You probably have a lot of engrams. Have you ever been audited? Don’t you think you should get audited? There’s a Scientology Center near here, I should take you…
