Just checking in
Will that be the king size bed as always?
Will there be the usualy parade of street walkers through the lobby on their way to your room at all hours?
Right. In that case I think you’ll want to know that the condoms available at the front desk are no longer free of charge.
We’ll be needing a cash deposit this time, as your last check was returned by your bank.
And if you leave the mattress all stained again we’ll have to bill you for that as well. What’s that? You’ve brought rubber sheets this time? Smashing!
Oh, and please don’t take the towels & coat hangers with you this time. Right.
I’ll call the bellhop.
Your entertainment has arrived, shall I escort, him . .er. .her. .er. .it to the room?
The duct tape is in the bathtub with the mackerel.
Have a pleasant stay.