Just how fucking stupid do I look anyway?

The BBQ Pit
1

Those of you who know me, don’t answer that please. :stuck_out_tongue:
Anyhow, I just got a Fabulous Special Offer™ from the company that issues one of the credit cards I carry. I don’t use it much at all, but it’s there for emergencies. Anyhow, here are the details of their Fabulous Special Offer™:

First of all, just because they love me and want me to be happy, attached to the offer was a check for eight whole dollars (“righteous bucks!”-Jeff Spicoli). It seems that they wanted me to rush right out in a buying frenzy and cash their check, using the money to buy whatever I wanted(OBOY! Three whole gallons of gas!). Doing so would also, with no effort required on my part(are they sweethearts or what?), enroll me in their cash rebate program. That was the Fabulous Special Offer™. See, if I am enrolled in their rebate program, they will send me an 2% refund on everything I use the card for(amazing!!)! That’s right, for every $100 I spend, I’ll get $2 back(I don’t know how they keep from going out of business they’re so generous)! Two whole percent the first $5000 I spend each year using their credit card, refunded directly to me. They even give me 30 days to review and evaluate this offer. At the end of those 30 days I would be billed the first year membership fee of $99.99. What a deal, right?!?

Hmmm. Lets do the math here…$5000 X 2% = $100. In order to get my hands on this $100, I will have to enroll in a program that costs…99.99 per year. Which means that I have the potential to come out........01 ahead at the end of the year. Gee, that’s…less impressive than one might hope for, and that’s only if I use the card for $5000 in purchases and never carry a balance. That seems like a rather poor return on my money, y’know?

BUT WAIT! I forgot the initial $8! That means that I could finish the year $8.01 ahead! That changes everything! That’s an 8% return on my investment! Woot! (Actually, an 8% annual return on your money isn’t terrible, it’s just not really worth pursuing when the amount in question is limited to $100.)
Except that if you read the fine print, your membership in this Fabulous Special Offer™ automatically renews at the end of one year for an annual fee of $109, and each year thereafter it costs $109.

So the way I see it, it would be barely possible to make a few measly dollars in one year on this program IF you charges $5000 or more on their card and IF you never carried any balance month to month at all and IF you remember to cancel at the end of the first year.

No thanks. However, I do wonder how many people do take “advantage” of this offer though. I afraid their are likely thousands and thousands of them, happily cashing their 20 or 50 or 100 dollar rebate checks at the end of the year, gloating over how they are getting “free” money. :smack: :smack: :smack: :smack: :smack: :smack: :smack: :smack:

2

You’re going to have to link to a pic before I can answer that for you.

3

I got one of those fake checks* from deepdiscountdvd. I called them up and canceleed all my outstanding orders and told them that they wouldn’t be getting any more business from me, ever. Fuckers.

  • for a whole $2.50!
4

Dude, you bothered to read the thing at all… that looks pretty stupid…

5

Sounds like something that should be reported to the Better Business Bureau or any other agency that regulates credit cards and bank loans. You can use most of what you posted. This must certainly qualify as a fraudulent business practice.

6

I have an American Airlines Frequent Flyer account because I travel occasionally for business. Citibank issues AAdvantage Visa cards which earn you miles each time you use them. They got in bed with American Airlines and I get my “mileage statements” in the form of credit card offers these days. I get probably one every three weeks and they are just gushing about how great the travel awards program is and how I can earn free travel so amazingly quickly([sub]with a $100 annual fee[/sub]). But here is my favorite part(formatting approximate).

Now, a $2,000 flat screen tv may be an “everyday purchase” for most people, I don’t know, but it sure as hell isn’t for me. And if I’m EVER living somewhere which needs 3k worth of home improvements as “everyday” expenses then I’m going to move as soon as possible!

The saddest part? They haven’t changed this part of the offer letter in several years. I guess no one in their marketing firm has clued in on how stupid these examples of “everyday purchases” make them look.

Enjoy,
Steven

7

My hat is off to whoever came up with that offer. What company is it, anyway?

8

I think it’s an Orchard Bank card.

9

whut begbert2 sed.

10

That’s asking us to resist an awful lot of temptation. :smiley:

11

The sad part is, I bet there are hundreds of people out there getting papercuts because they can’t seal the envelope fast enough to send it back.

12

Y’know, they must be related to the same overly generous folks at Cingular! They spontaneously wanted to send me a gift of a free (after mail-in rebate) phone just for being a Valued Customer (of 7 months); all I had to do was call and sign up for another 2 years of phone service, on top of my current line. I think whomever brainstorms these marketing ideas must be surrounded by morons, or have a wicked sense of humor no one else is getting.

13

You know, DDD is quickly sliding into evil territory, which pisses me off, because they’ve always been good to me, and they still have damn good prices, generally speaking. But I placed an order the other day, and in order to finally submit it, I had to read through a big honking “yes, please sign me up for every spam list you can find” offer and hunt down the tiny little “no, thanks, I’d rather not get assraped just now” button. It’s bad enough when they pop up an “offer” after my order has gone through, which is what I initally thought they’d done. But no, they actually would not process my order until I’d declined it. I think I’m done with them as well.

14

The best thing about that is it takes like fifty thousand miles for one plane ticket (and not one that actually carries you over 50,000 miles of land, either.) Plus you get to pay the $100 yearly fee.

15

It’s not fraudulent. All the information is there. The fact that it’s in Teeny Weeny Type Size that hardly anyone bothers to read is sneaky, but it’s there. No one can claim that the company did not fully disclose the terms of their offer.

Kudos to Weirddave for reading the mice type!

16

I’m still trying to get over the idea that you can get three gallons of gas for $8! Must be nice.

17

True enough, but it’s hard to see their intention as other than to mislead. Over here we have misleading and deceptive conduct under the Trade Practices Act to get at things that aren’t quite fraud. Perhaps you have something similar, since this seems neatly designed to just scrape through that sort of test too.

18

I don’t know if we have something similar over here in the States. We’re urged to “read the fine print” and while I agree it’s sneaky, it is there, if you take the time and effort to read it.

What I find amusing is the legal disclaimers at the end of TV/radio commercials, where someone is talkingsofastyoucan’thardlyunderstandthemastheyburyallthegotchainformationattheendoftheadsotheycansaywetoldyouaboutit.

19

This one’s different. Even if you know it’s not a “free phone”, they’re counting on you rationalizing it to yourself: “well, I’m going to be paying for cell service for the next couple of years anyway, so I might as well get something in return.” It’s not like you get a particularly good deal on your cell service by not getting the discounted/free phone; you just get the freedom to switch providers.

20

It is from an existing card that we have. We always read their ‘offers’; sometimes, credit card companies (and others) will send things that you have to opt-out of; we wanted to make sure this wasn’t one of them.