Kids are nuts

I’m in the kitchen area at work, and one of my co-workers is there with his 6 year old son. I don’t know the kid’s name, but for purposes of this story I’ll call him Pip. We have a soda fountain, and Pip’s dad says he can have some. Our intrepid hero grabs a glass and does Eeney-Meeney-Miney-Moe to determine which variety will have the opportunity to satisfy his rambunctous young thirst. The soda God Moe says Coke, and Pip flies into a wounded tantrum. He hates Coke apparently, and really wanted strawberry, but he is honor bound to accept Moe’s edict. He sulks briefly and then pleads his case. Pip (played by himself) enters into protracted negotiation with Moe (also played by Pip). Moe is stern but merciful, and they find a compromise position. Pip concocts a mixture of strawberry soda and Coke, and all is well. Dad is oblivious to the whole exchange.

I have Coke. I don’t ask Moe.

My girlfried watches a man argue with three personalities on the subway every day en route to work. But in truth, even he is not as bizarre as this kid.


My daughter told me a fairly elaborate story this morning about how she and her friend Kate were out driving and parked their car in the wrong place and it was towed away and they had to go to the money store and get some money to get it back.

I was a bit surprised, since my daughter is 3 and Kate is a small green terry-cloth rabbit. For the record, I think my daughter said that she was doing the driving.

My toddler is beginning to do things like this. Who needs cable? :slight_smile:

My cousin’s daughter is a wild one too. She can come up with the most hilarious stuff off the top of her head. I ask her what her plans are for the day and she’ll say something like “Well, first we’re gonna fly the magic duck to Disneyland…” When we decided we were going to the mall, I asked what she was shopping for and she replied without hesitation “A necklace” and when I asked her what kind, she said “Green.” I see! LOL

My 3 yr old neice and I were playing in the backyard last week. She says “Let’s play Car Crash!”
Thinking to myself, “Hmmm…this can’t be good…” I agree and she proceeds to position me on my knees at the bottom of the slope in the backyard. Then she goes up to the top and tells me to count to 3.
“1…2…3!” and she comes barrelling down the hill, as fast as she can, DIRECTLY AT ME.
She crashes into me as hard as she can and we both go sprawling all over the lawn.

“Neice,” I say, “I don’t think that’s a very nice game to play. Where did you learn that?”

“Day care.”
::: shudder :::

I’m never having kids. :slight_smile:

“A child is a curly, dimpled lunatic.”

  • Ralph Waldo Emerson

Kids aren’t nuts. They’re evil.

concurs Ever try babysitting 6 kids under 10 by yourself when your about ready to drop from lack of sleep? Fuuuuuuuuunnnnnn… I even got a papercut on my ear that night thanks to them…

As I type this I am on reprieve from a house of 5 children ranging from ages 4 thru 13. They shall be returning Sunday.

Demo thinks he goes to work every morning. phaw. :wink:

If I ever doubted that I definitely do not want to ever have kids, I don’t anymore.