grumble rant flame
watches his minions back away slowly…
Okay. More mundane pointless crap. A niiiiice, long rant.
Today was my big day; I got to buy $300 worth of knives for $120. As I pulled them out and paid, I was trembling with excitement as I now owned a BM 330, a bear claw, a Case caliber and some other little items for WAY less than they should have been. I was so happy.
Then he came. The customer. The everpresent idiot customer. The one who, because he’s gleamed a few knife facts here and there, considers himself an expert. The one who, in fact, knows SO much that he JUST HAS to educate MY ignorant ass about it all!
I didn’t see his stupidity at first… So I decided to show him my great buy. I pulled out my lovely new 330 and showed it to him, telling him proudly that I got it for $110 less than it should have cost. He proceeds to berate it, telling me it’s not sharp and that there’s a Burr on the blade. Moron. Okay, it so I have seen sharper. But damnit, it’s just about as sharp as they come. Far better than average. And it does NOT have a burr! I went over it with a magnifying glass for chrissakes!
Then he wants to see some knives. He looks at the M16 (Which he called the Kurkt, by the way, since the corporate logo for Colombia Rivers Knife and Tool is ‘CRKT’. Yes, you’re an expert.) and asks me what the difference is between that and the new M16LE (law enforcement blue version), since the LE is more expesive. I tell him it’s because the LE has an aluminum handle as opposed to the zytel that the M16 has. He says it’s not, it’s the same stuff. Um, no. No it isnt. You can tell by one of a few methods; Look at it. Feel it. Feel the weight, the balance. Hell, SMELL it. It’s NOT zytel! I went and checked the file after he left, just to be sure, and sure enough; Anodized aluminum. Moron. You can’t feel the difference between plastic and metal! And yet (here’s the fun part) you feel you need to tell me the best way to sharpen my dull knife. And you feel you have to entertain me with tales of your experience (You ground blades for planers! WOW! I guess you’re a friggin’ metallurgist, eh?).
He wants to know if the blade can be removed. I say yes, it can, but it’s really not recommended. Voids the warranty, in fact. But of course, he says, he has to remove it to get a really good edge on there.
It comes razor-sharp out of the box! And even if it didn’t, why do you need to take the blade off to sharpen it?! What’s WRONG with this man!? I didnt argue with him simply because I wanted so desperatly for him to LEAVE. He RUINED my gleeful, knifebuying day. Rat Bastard.
Incidentally, I dont get annoyed with people who dont know knives. If you’re one of those who couldnt care less, I salute you so long as you can admit that. People who come in like big shots, pretending they know everything and then make stupid, rookie mistakes annoy me to NO end.
And you people here that I’ve talked to do indeed know your shit. I like you people.
Okay, I feel better now. I’m gonna play with my new additions, I think, and revel in the small numbers on my receipt.
Had to get that out. Thanks folks.
