Actually I get my Butler to tell one of the underhousemaids to type my posts on here because you lot are all common as muck.
Benson!I require my nose to be picked this instant!
If your car is over 10 years old and cost less than $12,000 brand new, you are a loser.
If you buy scratch tickets, you are a loser.
If you’ll spend more than 5 minutes to save $5, you are a loser. For clarity: My sister will drive an hour away to save $3 on something.
Wipe the boogers off your kids nose, peasant.
If you eat off paper plates at any time at any meal, you’re barely good enough to mow my lawn. Further, plasticware is for primates.
Napkins are to made of cloth. Your Viva papertowels are not cloth.
If you drink any Anheuser-Busch or Miller products, you are low class. This goes double if any of your clothing serves as free advertising for these companies.
If your computer is a Hewlett-Packard, Epson, or any of the other Big Box Computer store brands, you are not worthy of the peanuts from my feces.
Cars that cost under $12,000 are built in sweatshops by sweaty people. They are unworthy of my ass-print on the seat.
The only tag in my suit is my name, put there by the tailor who made my suit.
The only logo on my French cuffed shirts is my initials.
When people get laid off in my world, they ask if they can work FOR me, not WITH me.
My boat does not reside on a trailer. A yacht is either in a slip at the club, or it does not exist.
When my car needs work, I am given a free loaner by the dealer that is worth more than 99% of the cars around me on the road. Then again, if you measure value by the worth of your car, you obviously have little value that is not on 4 wheels.
There are lots of things that may not be listed on the menu: is the fish breaded? is it grilled, fried, baked? Is it real gravy or made from a powder (they always lie about that one anyway)?
A friend of mine asked a waitress once if they used canned mushrooms in the omelette, I thought it was a strange question until the server said yes, yuck, change my order then. It’s not too much to expect the servers to know something about how the food is prepared or what options are available; some places will poach an egg, some won’t, how the fuck do I know if I don’t ask?
And since this thread is about elitism and I’m on a food rant: when I ask if the dish is made with Parmesan cheese, I mean something like Parmigiana-Reggiano NOT a cylinder of powder that used to bear some resemblance to real cheese but now has none of the flavour or texture!
You call yourself an Elitist?
Why just last night I turned down syphilis for Herpes.
A professional music fraternity? With an acapella group? Man, and I thought the guys in “normal” fraternities were worthy of ridicule…
Sweeeet! I’ll take my 14 year old truck ( that cost us $10k and we paid in CASH, MF!) and go off to buy a scratch off ticket and, buy me a MegaMillion (73million right now) and some Coors Lt.
I wants to par-tay with Dudley!
If you go to a high-end steakhouse and ask for your very-expensive cut of meat to be cooked any longer than medium-rare, you are a fucking moron.
Good God, man. Even mentioning lumpfish and caviare in the same breath shows that you are irredeemably déclassé, you swine.
Don’t tell me camping is vacation. Vacation is four walls, a king size bed, concierge and room service. Camping is work and it isn’t going to happen in my lifetime.
Don’t show me your Payless Pick A Pairs. Those shoes are cardboard junk. I will try to find something to compliment but i am lying.
Olive Garden is a step up from fast food. nuff said.
Cervaise, you are my kind of elitist.
If you order off-menu to cater to your prechuss widdle taste buds, not only do you deserve a crotch punch but to have your off-menu item spit in by all the kitchen workers. This isn’t Burger King! You can’t have it your way. If you want it your way, make it your fucking self.
If you wear a bluetooth and are not Jack Bauer, you are a douche.
Bravo! Bravo! clap, clap, clap
They should have trap-doors under the tables that funnel those people to the nearest ‘Sports Bar’.
Another elitist foodie item: You claim to be a “big fan of sushi” and you’ve only ever had california rolls and spicy tuna? Fuck you.
Disney World (and Land) is not cultural or even a vacation. What it is is a nice, safe, sterile, White Bread, homogenous, fuckinly overpriced, merchandise driven craptacular extravaganze that is located in the middle of a fucking swamp.
There isn’t one interesting thing about Disney except watching its fat, sunburned, moronic, sloth moving patrons waddle around the park all day arguing and eating that is entertaining. I could watch them all day, if I wasn’t so annoyed over eveyrthing else.
Same thing for Cruises. Safe. Sterile. Over priced.
Disney is to America what Mecca is to Islam.
You come near me and my butler will remove you from my property like a piece of stinking dogshit!
Can I bring mah friends! We’ll bring the chinette and wine in a box! ( Cause, we are fancy like that!)
Wanabee. I’ll have you know that same band wrote an entire album of songs dedicated to me and that I’m the only person they’ve ever performed it for.
-
If neither you nor a member of your immediate family or a loved one are on the basketball/football/sports team, why do you give a damn who wins? Spend the same money on theater?
-
Most rappers and pop music singers seem to have smaller vocabularies than a particularly old and well trained cockatiel. I’m not shocked by the ‘motherfuckers’ and ‘bitches’, I’m just bored.
-
Not everyone needs to go to college; in fact I daresay it’s wasted on most of the students who do. There’s nothing wrong with tech schools (and in fact much of the problem is not the fault of the students who go to them- why should a person who wants to become a nurse have to take World History and Intro to Astronomy?)
Poser!
You are nothing unless the band wrote an entire album for you, performed it for you while you take a bath AND signed over all the royalties.