As Sarah Silverman vehicles go, I prefer my penis.
I admit she hasn’t ridden it yet, but I can hope.
Actually, no, no you can’t. She’s fucking Matt Damon. You got no shot.
During Jerry Brown’s first time as governor in the 1970’s, National Lampoon’s fake news announced that Brown was embarking on a campaign to make people think he was a “real man”. Items included:
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Cracking of knuckles, and the plainly audible breaking of wind
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The addition of the words, “motherfucker”, “douchebag” and “my ass” to Brown’s vocabulary
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A fistfight (provoked by Brown) with actor James Cahn, in (some trendy) restaurant
Update accordingly.
Sorry, too late to edit:
Costco is totally elitist. Costs $55 a year. $110 if you’re an “Executive Member,” which I asume means a 1%er. Sam’s Club is a little more down to unwashed masses’ level, but not much.
I’ll bet Romney and Obama like Kirkland brand, damn elitists. (don’t say “who doesn’t?”)
He should clear some brush. That’ll do it.
Sorry for multiposting, but I just thought of something: much was made about Bush’s superiority because people wanted to have a beer with him, whereas people wanted to chase Kerry with pitchforks and torches. Something tells me most people would prefer to have a beer with Obama this election. Sadly, I can imagine one misguided campaign worker telling Mitt to just have one sip, it’ll make him cool.
He doesn’t always eat mayonnaise, but when he does, he prefers Hellman’s.
He pays his car elevator operator a living wage.
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Cracking of knuckles, audible breaking of wind (timeless classics)
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The addition of the words “assclown,” “freeballing,” and “cuntlapper” to Romney’s vocabulary
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A fistfight (provoked by Ann Romney) with actor Scott Caan in (some trendy) restaurant
He once drank an O’Doul’s and drunkenly slurred to his wife, “Ann Landers is a boring old biddy!”
He was more animal than man.
Miles ahead of you. She was out of my league even when she was fucking Jimmy Kimmel.
You might have a shot a Jimmy Kimmel.
Was it tied to the top of his car in a particularly amusing manner?
Mitt Romney is the embodiment of the mud slung at Kerry. Kerry would bargain in the Senate and they called it flip-flopping. Kerry would windsurf and they would call it elitist (unlike horse dancing). Kerry supposedly wasn’t a regular guy you would have a beer with. Heck, Romney’s fear of improvisation and machine-like speeches match perfectly with the phony attacks on Obama’s alleged dependence on the teleprompter.
Romney is basically an amalgam of the GOP’s phony cultural attacks.
Romney has some great friends who are NASCAR team owners. Curses, Poe’s Law strikes again!
That’s why they’re learning line dancing!
Well Mitt could…
Smoke some fags and play some pool,
pretend you never went to school.
But still you’ll never get it right,
cos when you’re laid in bed at night,
watching roaches climb the wall,
if you call your Dad he could stop it all.
You’ll never live like common people,
you’ll never do what common people do,
you’ll never fail like common people,
you’ll never watch your life slide out of view,
and dance and drink and screw,
because there’s nothing else to do.
He always politely honks his Bentley horn at stop lights when he’s next to a Mercedes and asks if they have any French’s yellow mustard.
Times were tough for Ann and Mitt in college.
I always took that like the lizard people line. Not “she’s fucking Matt Damon”, but she’s fucking Matt Damon!".
He puts A1 on his Kobe beef.
Make him “regular?” What, don’t the wealthy crap on the rest of us enough as it is?