Tan me hide when
you’re free, wouldja, Bruce?
But Bruce was busy
helping his elderly mother
tan her own hide
, resulting in a tragic
hide tanning tragedy. The
tragic tanning tragedy took
place in a church
notorious for its jaw-dropping
lack of safety protocols.
Sometimes toes were tanned
the wrong shade of
tan. Sometimes arms were
casually hacked off with
Reverend Parsnapple’s enthusiastic support.
As one naturally expects!
But no-one expects the
waffles to be poisoned…
Nor did they expect