One of the reasons I had to retire was I was so fucking tired of death. Now I’m watching my mother get steadily worse in a hospital bed. Somehow 88 years old isn’t long enough. Her mother lived to be 104 so we hoped we had more time.
Damn @Loach; that’s a tough one. Many of us have been there with Mom and the rest of us will be there eventually.
Wishing her strength and you peace. And vice versa really. We’re all here if/when it’s rantin’ time for you.
It isn’t easy. My Mom made it to 91 and a day. But the last 2 years she was barely there. I think in many ways that is worse. My Dad was my Dad until the last 2-3 weeks of his life. That seems better.
We just had the interment for both of their ashes down near Fort Dix at a military graveyard. But it still feels weird they’re gone.
@Loach, I am sorry. This is hard work, both for you and for your mother.
May things go as well as they possibly can.
Does it make sense to be talking to hospice?
Sorry @Loach.
I am in a similar boat. My mother is 82 and in failing health. She’s on oxygen, has cancerous spots in her lungs, and nearly blind. I’m not sure she will see 2024. It’s sad, as you know.
When your kid is wishing for more time with you, that’s a sign of a good Mom right there. I’m sorry you’re losing her.
Her mind is as sharp as ever. That’s mostly good.
We are pivoting to hospice in the hospital.
@Loach, I am sorry to hear this. Sometimes, I think that any amount of time on earth is not long enough. Big hugs to you, and to your Mom. May both your journeys be gentle.
@Loach Sorry you have to go through this. I can sympathize with you and it is no fun. I wish you and your mom all the best.
My father-in-law made it to 91, and although we all know that’s a pretty good run, we miss him. It’s a very hard thing to go through, and you have my best wishes.
@Loach I am sorry you are going through this. I hope you can draw some comfort from all the good memories you’ve had with her.
I am sorry you are going through this, it is very hard to say goodbye even when you know it is inevitable. My mum made it to 85, I spent as much time with her as I could but towards the end when she was in hospital, it was really hard to see the decline in her condition.
I wish both of you peace and strength to deal with this, and the comfort of a lifetime of cherished memories.
I didn’t get to the hospital in time to see her awake today. I don’t think she is going to wake up again.
My father died almost 34 years ago. It wasn’t even a thought in her head that there could be anyone else even though she was younger than I am now. I am not religious. I know her thoughts on religion have shifted back and forth over the years but I think she has some level of faith. She asked for last rites yesterday. I hope I’m wrong and she will be with him soon.
Her mother lived to 104. Cancer doesn’t run in the family but it got my mother. Her stubbornness got her three extra years with her mind intact. Her stubbornness also kept her from telling anyone she was feeling different until she couldn’t breathe. She responded well to the treatment so who knows what would have happened if it was found earlier.
I had to go feed the cats; and when I got back to the hospital my mother no longer appeared to be conscious.
Talk to her when you’re there. Apparently she may still be able to hear you, even if it doesn’t look like it.
(My mother was quite deaf without her hearing aid; and of course once unconscious couldn’t tell me if it was working. I talked to her anyway.)
My condolences, and I’m glad for you that you had her this long. My mom died when I was eleven.
Wishing Mom a peaceful passing at this point, with as little agitation as possible.
She passed away yesterday. It’s been a flurry of activity since then.
Oh man, I’m so sorry.
Long-distance hugs, @Loach.
– if the activity’s too much, go hide for a while if you need to. You’re probably exhausted.