Life is...

Life is a banquet and I’m just a guy with no fork.

Life is a beautiful blond in a Mercedes and I’m just a homeless guy watching her drive by.

Got any more?

From Auntie Mame: “Life is a banquet. And most poor suckers are starving.”
Per Steven Tyler: Life’s a journey, not a destination.
Life’s a gamble. Play the cards you’re dealt. ~ forget who
“Life is what you make it. You can make it chicken s***, or chicken salad.”- Lloyd Bridges in Cousins

To paraphrase Norm from Cheers: Life is a baby and I’m a diaper

…a cabaret, old chum.

…a bitch and then you die.

…is in the wrong forum.

I’m so confused…I always thought it was “Life’s a bitch, and then you marry one.” ?

…is short and glory is fleeting.

…is a dog race and I am the rabbit.

From the Bob Newhart show:

“Life is like a merry-go-round.”
(pause)
“Why?”
“They both have horses.”

by somebody (I forget)

…a highway (hum hum hum)… all night long.

Sir Rhosis

Life is Just a Bowl of Cherries

(Rudy Vallee made it popular first, AFAIK. This site includes a midi.)

Tom Lehrer: “Life is like a sewer. What you get out of it depends a lot on what you put into it.”

Keith Reid: “Life is like a beanstalk. Isn’t it?”

John Lennon: “Life is what happens while you’re making other plans.”

You are born cold, wet, and naked, then things get worse.

Not all things that count can be counted, and not all things that can be counted count.

. . . is not a bowl of cherries. It is a bowl of jalapenos. What you do today will burn your ass tomorrow.

Life is an endless struggle against gravity - me

Life is a Sh*t Sandwich, the more Bread that you’ve got the better it tastes.

Unclviny

…a box of choc-o-lates?

“Life…is like a box of chocolates. A cheap, thoughtless, perfunctory gift that nobody ever asks for. Unreturnable, because all you get back is another box of chocolates. So, you’re stuck with this undefinable whipped mint crap that you mindlessly wolf down when there’s nothing else left to eat. Sure, once in a while, there’s a peanut butter cup, or an english toffee, but they’re gone too fast, and the taste is…fleeting. So you end up with nothing but broken bits filled with hardened jelly and teeth-shattering nuts. And if you’re desperate enough to eat those, all you’ve got left is an empty box filled with useless brown paper wrappers.”

– “Smoking Man”, The X-Files

…better than the alternative.

…wasted on the living.

…an Eskimo Pie. Let’s take a bite.

-Frank Sinatra.
sort of

a very complex series of chemical reactions governed by the physical laws of the universe.