I gotta toss in the definition of a limerick from David Gerrolds “War Against the Chtorr” books (Every chapter in one of them ends with a limerick.)
A limerick of classic proportion
Should have rhyme, meter, and a portion
Of humor quite lewd
And a frightfully crude
Impossible sexual contortion.
Now here’s mine:
There was a young man named Buzz,
Whose tastes made trouble with the fuzz.
He slept with the dead
“It’s legal”, he said,
“As long as they’re consenting adults”!
No, I’m not ashamed. I’ve read what the rest of you have posted. 
Since we’re headed from bad to worse, I figured this was a good time to put mine in.
When speaking to proper yong lasses
Dirty Old men could fog up their glasses
At the mention of sin
After three shots of Gyn
And the mixin’ and minglin’ of classes
A handsome young plummer named French
Would rarely pass up a good Wench
When called to fix pipe
She’d already be ripe
And he hardly did work with his wrench
last, and possibly least
The art of transforming a man
To putty which melts in her hand
Was mastered by Beth
When she worked without breath
And did mouth-to-mouth on his gland
I’ve heard that “size doesn’t matter”
But I suspect gals say this to flatter
Us loveable guys
Of average size
Or an inch short or long (I’m the latter)
There once was a President, Bill
Who found that an intern can thrill
And got his delight
When she turned off the light
And promised she’s taking the pill
just for TN
There once was a Tennessee Lad
About his own schlong he was glad
Didn’t realize at all
Wheather big, wide or tall
Not beeing used is the thing that is bad 
The sound for which I’ve yearned,
has meter twisted and turned;
It’s come back to me,
with little mercy,
The Limerick thread has returned.
To see a woman’s smile,
at actions mildly vile;
From whence you pee,
insert into she,
That’s doing it "SouthernStyle!
Casanova, the lover of lore
Was insisting on love on the floor
And he wore just his grin
When the husband walked in
Now poor Casa is lovin’ no more
Casanovette the little known sis,
of the lover that just didn’t miss;
Had the adorable habbit,
of love like a rabbit,
and sent men away with a kiss.
It’s late and there’s naught to do
but sleep or sit on the loo;
for lack of much else
I pleasure myself
and post on straight dope until 2
“It’s not just awful. It’s god-awful.”-Max Cannon