Lindsay Lohan - HIRE A DRIVER ALREADY!!

Ah, man. I remember that batch. :cool:

She was doin’ worse than porn. She offered me a BJ for $500, and eventually came down to $20. This was in Vegas, shortly after her video store robbery infamy.

I still passed.

Seriously? :eek:

I wouldn’t consider Dana Plato a “famous mainstream actress” - she was a supporting child star on a popular TV series who got most of her press when she started blowing up her life.

Jan-Michael Vincent was almost to starhood (though again, on the little box, not the big one) when he imploded - and he never went to porn.

A steal! For $20 I’d take a blowjob from Conrad Bain.

I must say hers is one of the best DUI mug shots I’ve seen. She looks ragged but still beautiful (even with the blonde hair), only confused. And by “confused” I mean still loaded.

Chlöe Sevigny - The Brown Bunny

Not a porn movie, but an on-screen, no illusions blow-job counts in my book.

Was Dana Plato really an A-list actress, though? She was a supporting character on a family comedy for a few years.

Silenus, when people talk about acresses falling to hard core porn, they usually mean PORN, e.g. “Butt Fuck Sluts Go Nuts #41.” Unsimulated sex in legitimate movies isn’t quite the same thing, and isn’t necessarily indicative of an actress’s career falling apart - Chloe Sevigny is doing fine.

Different Strokes-era Conrad Bain, or Conrad Bain today? What about Conrad Janis? :wink:

Dana Plato was about as famous as the chick from the Urkel show who did actual hardcore porn. Who? exactly.

And while I agree LL no matter how bad off would never have to do porn, in her state she may do it while spaced out just for shits and giggles.

For $20, you ain’t gettin’ no different strokes. You’re getting the usual stroke, and you better hurry your ass up and finish.

Let’s keep our fingers crossed.

Reportedly, Tina Fey had a “listen, young lady” talk with her when she did SNL. This must have been after they shot “Mean Girls”.

I used to kind of think she was funny in a you-spoiled-white-trash way, but now it’s over the line. Driving drunk kills people. The mother of my grade 6-10 best friend was killed on her neighborhood fitness walk by the kid two doors from us. He was supposedly on something, but I don’t know what, probably because he was convicted as a juvenile.

Lindsey has very high odds to spend a couple years in jail (actual years, not years of sentencing), or end up dead or maimed after she crashes her car even worse or pisses off a drug dealer. Did you hear how her bodyguard quit? He says:

“In April she asked me to take her to her dealer in Beverly Hills. Suddenly she started screaming and punching him for selling her short. He pulled a gun. I got out and he threatened to shoot me unless I got her to back off — but she kept hitting him. I dragged Lindsay into the car and drove off but she was screaming at me to go back. I knew then she was just too dangerous to be around.”

NOT the lovely Laura? Say its not so!

Dana Plato didn’t do hardcore porn. She was topless and kissing a woman. There was no dildo action or double penetration.

No, Jaimee Foxworth, “Judy”. A simple google search turned this up. Apparently her mother got too demanding, and Urkle was taking over the show anyway, and in one episode she went upstairs and was never mentioned again. I guess it’s kind of like Chuck Cunningham. Oh, and then her family got permission to plunder her $550k trust fund, and there you have it. Although why she would now be working for her mother after all that is beyond me.

Man, I can’t believe I just researched this. I’ve never even seen a whole episode of that dumb show.

Dress like a Leprechaun and say “Whachootalkinboutwillis” a few times and he might even do it for free.

Or maybe I’ve just been watching too much Robot Chicken.

Will you settle for Max Wright?

Everyone owes her an aplogy, it turns out, she’s innocent of these charges- her quote:

“I am innocent… did not do drugs they’re not mine. I was almost hit by my assistant Tarin’s mom I appreciate everyone giving me my privacy,”

I guess somebody else put that cocaine in her pants pocket without her knowledge–which, judging by the pictures I’ve seen of what she wears, would have been no mean feat. Bravo, Mystery Drug-Planter!

By all accounts, getting into her pants is a pretty simple feat. It’s leaving cocaine there that would be the challenge. :stuck_out_tongue: [/cheap shot]