I’m a cat. We’re fraternal twins, not identical.
Ah, it’s all clear now.
At risk of sounding serious, thanks. That was beautiful.
If you didn’t have a colander, I would give you one of mine.
[QUOTE=Zeriel]
You’re the first person in this thread I have actually envied (and I pretty much have literally everything I could want EXCEPT a vocation/calling: easy work that pays a lot, wife kid new car vacations blah)
[/QUOTE]
Well, I envy you for your kid! That’s one thing I haven’t gotten around to doing yet.
Aw, shucks. I might not have said anything on a different day, but I’m five weeks away from graduation after two incredibly brutal years and it’s a hard enough job without the drive-by insults.
This was a wonderful post overall, but I want to point out that when Lindsey says “too stupid to major in English” she means it like “too trashy to get into Hooters”. It’s not enough to slam her target: she’s got to take a second to jab a passer-by as well.
Furthermore, English did not bore the shit out of you because you were so good at it, it bored the shit out of you despite the fact that you were so damn good at it. Plenty of us who stayed English majors were also pretty talented, you know. You are sorta-kinda-I-assume-accidentally suggesting that the people who stayed English majors were just too stupid to get it and move on.
She doesn’t always drink beer, but when she does, she prefers Dos Equis.
but they’re different colors!
My wife just informed me that we actually own THREE colanders! Plus a wire mesh strainer! You may now refer to me as “Sir Lord Smeggington Three-Colander Headworth, Esquire.”
pics or it didn’t happen!
Alas, I have but one colander. 
But, it is a cool orange enamel one like this, so I’m not a total loser!
Silly Earthlings. WE invented the colander, but we called it a helmet. It didn’t have holes. It was for Gort. Of course you changed it and screwed up your civilization.
One of our many contributions to your backwater of a planet.
We also invented clueless young rich girls just to piss you off.
That looks like it’s from the 70s. That style is played out, man.
it’s cool in a retro kind of a way!
This colander thing, do; chinoises, China caps, and mesh strainers count too?
CMC fnord!
Lets see, 3 silicone (collapsible, in three sizes), 2 stainless steel, 1 aluminum, 1 plastic, 1 plastic centrifuge colander (AKA a salad spinner, but it’s spun more non-salad things than salads (the original Ronco one too!), 5 mesh strainers (in three sizes), 1 large fine mesh strainer, 1 medium mesh basket, 2 large mesh baskets with extendable handles, 1 China cap with stand and the wooden thingy.
Do I win anything (other than a very cluttered kitchen)?
if you have to ask, you can’t be in the club… 
i’ve read the word colander so many times now it’s lost all meaning.
Jiminy jillikers!
And, CMC, itemizing your colanders publicly is very nouveau riche. You may as well keep the price tags on them too, to impress your dinner guests.
Personally, I just make the help cup their hands over the sink while I pour the water out of the pot. Once you’ve tasted authentically hand-strained, you’ll never go back. I swear all other pasta tastes metallic to me now.
Please stop complaining about those of us who forget to use caps. There are several reasons for this:
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Some people don’t have fancypants keyboards. Those cap keys are expensive!!! (points at self)
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Some people were raised in the lap of luxery and have computer programs with autocorrect. They were raised knowing that the cyberslaves would auto correct.
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Some people are Gor Kijara (read online slaves) and have been trained out of using uppercase to refer to themselves so their keyboard skills change.
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Hi Opal.
Just because I wanted to impress everyone, I used a rock and a used nail to pound holes in one of my cat’s bowls. My cat now has a colendar!!! Beat that bitches!!!
As soon as I get paid, I’m going to take the roll of black and white film to the drugstore, and then you will ALL be impressed!!!
…I’m afraid I’m going to have to ask you to leave the thread. Your membership card, please.
I deserved to be called out on that one. I’m sorry. I love English lit, and wasn’t intentionally slamming people who made that choice. I found the English program at my university to be rather lackluster and I’m kind of a ‘‘path of most resistance’’ sort of person so I went with Spanish literature, which had all the fun of English lit but for me, twice the challenge. I am really comparing a mediocre English program with an excellent Spanish program, though, so it’s hardly fair. I doubt lindsay has much more respsect for Spanish majors than English majors anyway.
No problem. I am just a little sensitive about the value of the liberal arts. And of course lindsay has no respect for Spanish. It’s the language of poor people, after all!