I’m a child of the 80s. The only princess who was on my radar was Shera, who I don’t even remember that well. The only Disney movie I remember watching in a semi-obsessive fashion was “Dumbo”. When I was a kid, I wanted my mother to buy me Underoos. No princesses were in the Justice League.
So I guess this thing took off some time in the 90s? Maybe later? Why is it so bad now?
But is it REALLY that bad? I know I’d rather my daughter be like I was as a kid, which would mean being as far away from a “princess” as possible. But is there any research showing that the kind of make-believe children participate in shapes their personalities and performance later in life? If we continue to see young women doing well in school and entering STEM fields, wouldn’t this debunk the claim that society is at risk of raising a bunch of spoiled, self-centered, high-maintenance women?
Anecdote: my niece, just before entering kindergarten, defied her father’s request to pick up her toys by putting her nose in the air and announcing in a bitchy “what are you, retarded?” tone of voice, “I don’t have to. Don’t you know that princesses don’t clean?”
Interesting thread topic, I hope it generates a lot of discussion. I’ll just be over here, so thankful I had boys.
My daughter was into princesses when she was younger. When she was about 4 she wanted to be a togropher (photographer), a firefighter or a fairy when she grew up. At 12 she is excelling in the sciences and math. I don’t really see a problem.
We never pushed are girls into being girly. That didn’t stop them from being the girliest girls on earth. The princess thing was just a phase not a big deal. Pretty dresses and bright colors.
I think some people don’t like it cause they hate Disney. They hate that Disney has this superficial role models for little girls, but let’s face it - little mermaids and princesses sell better than neuroscientists.
It’s fantasy. And let’s face your daughter (not your specifically) probably does have a better chance of becoming a princess than the President (something that parents seem to think is reasonable career goal to tell their kids).
Sure if little girls start embracing that they really are a princess - and feel like they don’t need to clean - then you might need to tone it down a bit.
I wanted to be a Ninja when I was little - that didn’t work out either. I don’t remember if I thought Ninjas cleaned their rooms or not.
I think royal watching and princess stuff is normally harmless fun.
But to the topic, it’s harmless fantasy. All kids have unrealistic goals for themselves, and the vast majority of us don’t achieve them. That’s what we call “life”.
I don’t think the issue is that it’s an unrealistic goal, but that it’s a somewhat empty one: a princess is famous, adored, and wants for nothing simply because of some innate quality that makes her special. Not all “princess” type figures are like this, but some are, and I think it’s something I would steer a daughter away from. Especially those aspects of being a princess that really focus on how others react to you: they all know you, want to be your friend, do what you say. I don’t think the daydream of always being the center of attention is something I would want to encourage.
On Paradise Island, she wore a flowy white dress that somehow never got dirty & a crown (and went hunting and racing around and ruled over her subjects) and then she fought crime in the slightly more recognizable clothing.
When I was little (70s), that was part of the cool thing about being a princess. Princesses could do whatever they damned well pleased (which included rescuing people from disaster and wearing twirly dresses, often at the same time) without being bogged down by the more mundane details of life (like cleaning your room) because, as a princess, you could have those taken care of for you.
I do not have kids, but it does seem that Disney’s taken it a little too far.
When my nieces went through the princess phase I used it as learning opportunity and taught them about the lives of real princesses which meant a lot of hard work and sacrifice. We even developed a saying we still use to encourage each other: “Be a princess” It’s based on the example of Elizabeth I of England. It means hold your head high and persist on no matter what someone else accuses you of and what obstacles they put in your path.
I have an almost-three-year-old, so we’re in the thick of the princess thing at my house. I have decided that it doesn’t bother me in the least. Recent Disney movies and Sophia The First all emphasize the valuable personal qualities of the princesses. At this point, I don’t think my toddler associates being a princess with ordering people around or living a life of luxury. I think she equates it with getting to wear sparkly dresses.
aside
Mercy is the high school I would have gone to had we stayed in Louisville. I suspect their ads address the thought that as an all-girls Catholic school they are raising the future housewives of America rather than being a college prep school.
My daughter is 14, a Dr. Who fan who reads excessively and currently wants to be a rocket scientist. She is the star of the middle school knowledge bowl team. She has just started brushing her hair without being reminded more often than not. She is running a game at the local gaming convention. She downhill skis competitively (badly, but competitively), and is in student council and on the schools swing choir. She also has the lead in the middle school fall play.
Her fascination with princesses and pink from four to seven doesn’t seem to have done her much harm. Nor has bi annual trips to Disney World (where she likes Minnie better than any of the Princesses - we still get Minnie’s autograph).
My favorite princess is a Disney fan who is a friend of mine. She goes with a bunch of her girlfriends to WDW every year and they wear tiaras and drink a lot in matching t-shirts. She’s an MD. Doesn’t seem to have hurt her either.
That’s sort of where Disney is going with their marketing - being a princess for a little girl is more about dressing up from prom. Its about selling sparkly dresses, not about developing a political philosophy based on serfdom. It is still - generally although there are exceptions (Merida) - about romantic relationships as well. Though modern Disney princesses don’t tend to be Sleeping Beauty, who…well, sleeps through most of her own movie.
Combating Princess Syndrome. Is the princess marketing making little girls think they should float though their lives and not care about anything but their looks, or is it just making them want to wear pink, sparkly dresses? I don’t know.
Watching any reality tv, I’d say that there are far too many young women in North America who are deeply invested in their own Princesshood.
Yeah, but that happened long before the marketing media blitz for princesses. There have always been women who think being pretty is the most important thing, who think attracting a man is how you achieve financial security, and who value material possessions above all. Caroline Bingley in Pride and Prejudice seems to fill the princess bill rather well - and the character was written 200 years ago. We’ve called them “princesses” for a long time - which is offensive to - oh say Queen Elizabeth who spent the blitz as a princess in London doing her duty to raise morale (and apparently learning to fix cars) or Princess Anne, who acts in some sort of official capacity for 200 charities (I’m sure she isn’t doing the books, but even just attending the biggest annual fundraising event for 200 charities would be exhausting).
Both of my daughters (22 and 20 years old now) were princesses at one time or another. Because we went to Renaissance Faires since they were in strollers, they knew that princesses carried swords, hunted with falcons, and occasionally needed to storm a castle to rescue a prince. They both turned out as normal as a child of mine could be expected to.
Personally, I think the issue is that toys and entertainment have become increasingly gender-segregated, and reinforce outdated stereotypes, especially for girls.
The perfect example is Lego. There are plain Lego sets - the default. And now there are special Lego sets for girls, which are pink and purple and have beauty parlors and veterinarian offices instead of police stations and awesome Star Wars vehicles. It’s a good example of “men are people, and women are women.”
I think the backlash is in serious danger of becoming “pink is evil” and “princess play is contemptible” (this is why I didn’t really like the Goldieblox “Girls” ad from the get-go), when really it should be “girls come with different interests, and some would like colors other than pink and toys other than dolls and ballgowns.”