Libertine? Sadistic?
Moria was designed by the famous dwarf architect Emsi, son of Ezher.
snerk
Irks:
The already-mentioned camping up of Galadriel’s renunciation of the Ring, and gutting of Saruman’s role, also dump some of my favorite dialogue from the entire book. OK, I’m petty. But I think it would have been nice to hear Sam wishing Galadriel would take the Ring, because she’d “make some folks pay for their dirty work”, and Galadriel remind him that “that is how it would begin. But it would not stop with that!”
Theoden is a southpaw swordsman, which would make him useless in a shieldwall, and a bit disruptive even in a cavalry charge. IIRC there were no lefthanded sword fighters in days of old–lefties were forced to train with the right.
But that stopped bothering me after the opening of the battle of Helm’s Deep, when the orcs form up and charge the Deeping Wall WITH LOWERED SPEARS. Excuse me? Are they going to poke the wall with the points? Are they going to plant the points and pole-vault to the parapet? What exactly was that all about?
That scene did have one helpful effect: at that point I gave up expecting ANY military tactics that would make sense outside of a fantasy movie, and sat back to enjoy the fun. Theoden being a lefty stopped bothering me. Legolas’s sledding, and the dwarf-tossing, barely raised an eyebrow. The final charge of Gandalf et al downhill onto the Orcs’ spears (THAT’S what spears are for), which would be pure suicide in an actual battle, just looked cool. As did the Ents’ giant game of Whack-an-Orc at Isengard. I guess the moral is, if you’re going to do a battle scene with crazy-ass tactics, start off with crazy-ass tactics, so everyone knows what to expect.
Likes:
All my favorite eye candy moments (so many!) have already been mentioned, so let me call out some ear candy: the thundering sound effects when the Mumakil advance. You had to be in a theater (with a good sound system) to really appreciate them: they threw in those loud, low-frequency notes that are not so much heard as felt, through the vibrating floor.
Yeah, that and more. I am sorry I can’t spend more time looking for the word. IMS(which is iffy with me), it was used to describe ol’ Butt of Malmsy Clarence from Richard III. Denethor exhibits the same lustful appetite (not sex, folks) in that scene with Pip, but there is a dark element to it–a brooding malevolence. It repels and disgusts me, but it’s damned fine acting.
Wins the thread for minuteness… 
In Isengard’s defense, they had to get the war machine in gear to take on Rohan, and spears are a sound weapon to produce when you anticipate taking on cavalry. Of course, at one point they correctly assumed that Theoden would lead his people to Helm’s Deep, but maybe at that point it was too late to really crank out a lot of swords.
That wasn’t Théodred; he was already dead (or at death’s door, I forget). Nor was it Éomer; he was already banished. It was the doorward (Háma?) who’d let the big G take his stick in the first place. It flashed through my mind that he knew perfectly well what he was doing when he didn’t relieve Gandalf of the staff.
That scene was exaggerated – the trees were planted at an angle and the cameras tilted to make them vertical. Still a good scene, though (and great horsemanship).
I’d say my biggest irk was the over-the-cliff bit in TTT and my biggest please not yet mentioned would be Grond in ROTK – for once movie-magic exceeded my imagination. The miniature was described as about as big as an SUV. I wonder where it is today?
“Voluptuary”, damnit!
Or “sybaritic”, I suppose.
Either that or it was the Istari Mind Trick:
“Hand over your staff!”
“You wouldn’t take an old man’s walking stick.”
“I wouldn’t take an old man’s walking stick.”
“Introduce us.”
“I’ll introduce you.”
Irked: And then the story continues with Gandalf the White in the next movie, with them fighting atop the tallest mountain. Did they get to the bottom then get in an elevator?
You could say that.
That bit is actually canon. After they fell, they fought under the earth until finally the Balrog fled. Gandalf pursued him through the dark tunnels until finally they were both at, if I remember correctly, the Endless Stair. It was supposed to have been an endless spiral spanning uncountable steps that finally led to the top of…hmm, I forget. But wherever it led, it was waaay up high.
I guess the fight up would have been cinematic overkill and was edited out.
On topic…
My irks… The awful CGI bit where Galadriel refused the Ring. I think Cate Blanchett is a competent enough actress to have pulled that scene off without any need for bizarre possessed voices and ghostly wraiths and whatnot. Oh that fake voice!
Also, the kiss between Aragorn and Arwen at the coronation. It was not dignified, dammit! We’re talking about Aragorn, the greatest present-day Numenorean, and Arwen Undomiel, daughter of Elrond, grand-daughter of Galadriel! They’re not going to make out in public and giggle!
My likes… absolutely everything else. I don’t care what was cut out, or what was changed. I will love Peter Jackson forever for making the books flesh and blood, and so beautifully too.
Just to clarify a bit more:
:smack:
That’s right. It’s been a while since I’ve seen it, and all I could remember when I was typing my post was that the person who stopped the guard from stepping forward was someone who I’d seen earlier in the movie, who obviously realized what was happening, and knew that trying to stop them was futile. And I hadn’t thought of the possibility that the doorward had deliberately let Gandalf keep his staff. Now I’m going to have to watch the movie again and see if I can catch any sign of that.
:eek:
That’s brilliant! I can see this scene in my head, and it’s giving me goosebumps.
I will try to look for it this weekend. I am now a full blown political junkie AND I have to work, so I don’t have much time do chase words down. My thesaurus is useless.
Irk: the way Theoden says the line when Eowyn inquires after Aragorn. “We have paid with many LIVES!” God, I hate how he says that line. We mock it openly when viewing it.
Oh, that one was good.
Irks:
The bloody annoying ‘Theoden’s will crumbling’ bit in Helm’s Deep. Dude, you’re at war. You do not want the orcs to win. If you give in, every single Rohirrim will die. Likewise Gandalf’s wondering if Frodo and Sam are still okay. Of course they are, otherwise Sauron would have the Ring and you’d all be dead!
Likes:
The Glittering Caverns, and the “Where is the horse and the Rider.” scene. Brilliant. Perfect.
The charge onto the Fields of Pelennor. Also perfect. I started crying at that point first time I saw it, and didn’t stop until the end of the movie.
I thought the Eowyn/Aragorn cooking scene was funny. Silly, but funny.
You know, my baby hasn’t seen the movies or read the books yet. He might watch his first LotR movie today. I haven’t seen them in at least a year.
One irk from TTT:
The scene when Aragorn/Gimli/Legolas, pursuing the Uruk-Hai, first meet Éomer and his troop of exiled Rohirrim.
Thunder of approacing horses, then the Rohirrim appearing over the rise and riding past, until hailed by Aragorn, then wheeling back.
Impressive cinematography, but what I have never seen mentioned: doesn’t that scene make Éomer an incompetent commander of cavalry? Instead of past three friendlies, they could as easily have blindly ridden past an orcish ambush.
What the book makes clear, and the movie does not, is that Aragorn, Legolas, and Gimli are all wearing the cloaks Galadriel gave them. They don’t make them invisible, but they do make them extremely hard to see. Frodo and Sam hide from a couple of Southrons under another of Galadriel’s cloaks in TTT after Sam falls down the hill and goes boom. That’s actually another irk of mine: when you’re looking at the hillside through the Southron’s point-of-view the cloak has apparently transformed itself into a big cheesy-looking canvas rock, and then they have to do a fast jump-cut as Frodo throws the cloak back after the Southrons leave. It just looks kind of amateurish to me.