After reading the thread wrap-up for 2008, I saw several replies that listed lack of sex as one of the things that made those people’s years shitty. Now I didn’t think to put that down for myself, but it’s true (spouse has severe back problems that aren’t fixable except by really expensive surgery and time off from work that he can’t swing for such an extended period) and in the spirit of “misery loves company,” I thought I’d ask Dopers just how long was your longest dry spell.
Unfortunately, I’ll be the sacrificial lamb here and say it’s been since June '05. So after 3 years, I’m definitely hoping the future will be brighter.
17 years. But once I lost my virginity, I don’t think I went more than 9 or 10 months without something (from another person). Does oral count? Anal? Handjobs?
44 days. Around the third week masturbation didn’t even take the edge off. I thought I was going to lose my mind. I can’t even begin to imagine going months or years.
[ul]
[li]We’re not talking before you lost your viginity here. Had it and then are ceasing to have any more at the moment.[/li][li]For the purposes of this thread, the criteria to be established is with regards to actual intercourse. If you’re (hopefully) having anything else, good on you, but let’s just stick to the “Tab A” into “Slot B” variety. Straight or same sex coupling equally applies.[/li][li]No prizes, but I’d certainly wish the Gift of Laidness on Ye All.[/li][li]Finally, if at all possible, can we keep this civil? Questions are certainly permissible (it’s up to the person addressed if they are willing to answer), but no judging please.[/li][/ul]
About 2 years I think - from age 16 to 18. I was pregnant, then gave birth, then was too busy with a baby and school and life to really even think about sex. Well, OK, I thought about it. I just didn’t have it. With another actual human being anyway.
Beyond that… that being the longest dry spell ever, I don’t think I’ve ever gone longer than a couple of months between lovers or boyfriends. I get really cranky without a good dicking at least once or twice a week.
Just shy of four years. The last year or so I was drinking, I was too broken to even care. When I dried out, I took AA’s advice and waited a year before even thinking about getting involved with anyone. This was the best thing I could have done for myself - I was entirely too vulnerable to handle even a purely physical relationship, and and emotional one would have been a big dramatic disaster. Then, by the time my first year of sobriety was over and I realized dating was an option, I just didn’t feel ready. I was ready to have sex (and by ready I mean desperate), sure, but I still had no idea how to get to know people without the benefits of alcohol. I knew (thanks to 2 years of therapy & AA at that point) that I wasn’t emotionally capable of having no-strings attached sex, so I waited until I met someone I liked & trusted. It took a long goddamn time!
This past summer I started dating a great guy and without getting graphic, the dry spell ended. We broke up after a few months because we realized we wanted different things out of life, but I’m glad for the way things happened.
Dry spells are almost always going to be frustrating, but they’re not always a bad thing.
Jesus, I feel bad for some of you! I came in here to bitch because I haven’t gotten any for 5 months. I am married though, so I think that’s practically a deal-breaker. You other marrieds, barring illness and such, how the hell do you put up with no sex. Come January, it will most likely end my marriage (well, among many other things, many of which a lot of you may know about!) As in the song, “…masturbation’s lost it’s fun…” you know, that Greenday song. I needs my sex and shouldn’t have to apologize!
