I love train wrecks. When there is a lot of drama going down, I am all up in it. In real life, I take a lawn chair approach to it. On message boards, I may chime in a bit more, since there are no consenquences.
Just now, in another thread, I was so sure the drama train was coming that I was chomping at the bit! (a bit too much…to the point of instigating.) I felt a bit bad when the drama I was looking for didn’t happen.
The thing is, I wonder what this says about my character. I actually do strive to have the kind of character my daughter can aspire to (although I usually end up aspiring to her moral compass!). But this issue of loving to see the fireworks go down on the boards is really something that I wouldn’t want to have to work on. I want to keep that. Can I? Or am I not growing as an upright human being if I indulge in trainwreck-loving?
Now, instigating is not right. I know that. I know better than that, and that is something I try not to do, and on the rare occasion I slip, I feel genuinely bad. But just the idea of enjoying the drama…is that something I should be working to overcome?
I know what you mean. I do loves me a good trainwreck… I’ve been known to take guilty pleasure in a pile-on as well.
Have you listened to the “This American Life” on the subject of “fiasco”? Host Ira Glass’s theory is that the normal social order collapses when we witness a fiasco – an event outside the normal boundaries of human blunder.
Depends, I think. Are you personally involved in the real life drama that you enjoy? Do you deliberately poke wasp’s nests with sticks? (metaphorically speaking, that is…) If you are constantly the eye of the drama hurricane based on your intentional actions, I’d say that that’s an issue.
Being fascinated by the myriad ways that people work hard to make their own lives worse? I think that’s pretty normal. I have Facebook acquaintances that I really should un-friend, but I just can’t resist looking at the constant barrage of status updates graphically detailing just how messed up they really are. It sounds mean when you type it out like that, but hey, I’m not the one trying to start a public flame war with the in-laws! (that was a good one!Soon this person’s cousins and cousins in law were joining the fray, a veritable online Jerry Springer show! :p)
Sigh. I have to ask you to explain the quote. I don’t get it. How does it relate to loving drama?
JimmyFlair, I’m really good at avoiding real life drama. I am an eager spectator, but I save any involvement for message boards, where there is no punishment for me throwing in my two cents.
Chacoguy, I don’t like Schadenfrude (is that how it’s spelled?) to describe it, because I don’t rejoice in people’s misfortune or pain. I only have fun when it is a bunch of chaos over things like gossip or debates. And is that video real? It is setting off ‘staged’ alarms for me.
Drama Llamas are one of nature’s most majestic beasts so it’s is only right that you take time out from the everyday hustle and bustle to sit back and marvel in the glorious spectacle. But I don’t think you should interfere with them in their natural habitat for they are wild and free. Don’t provoke them, or frighten them. Don’t try to tame them or teach them tricks - they are not there purely for your own amusement.
Lol cows, on the other hand, have been bred specifically for farming by humans. Feel free to milk them as much as you like.
“… everything in nature is lyrical in its ideal essence, tragic in its fate, and comic in its existence.”
Drama, like fire, mostly doesn’t just happen. Sure, occasionally someone gets struck by lightning, but most of the time the drama needs to be kindled, and nurtured, and and occasionally doused with fuel to provide a truly spectacular show.
My experience is that people who have constant drama thoroughly enjoy their constant drama, so I see no harm in you enjoying it as well.
In the poem the guy talks about how he’s riding down the road (on his horse) and he happens accross another guy who crashed his chariot off the other side of the road. It was a pretty gahstly sight to see as the guy was mangled pretty badly.
The author of the poem wanted to look away from the carnage; but he just couldn’t. He felt bad of himself because of that. Which leads us to the phrase “Cursed are these eyes; drink your fill.”
I’ve been known to postpone lunch at work because I want to see what happens when Miss Thing comes in and sees what So-and-So did. (Or is that Miss Thang?) Anyway, the lady closest to me is also an audience member. Sometimes we pretend to talk to each other, when actually all our attention is on what’s happening in the next room.
Pot-stirring behavior, including going out of one’s way to provide an audience, is often way, way more transparent than the person doing that behavior thinks it is. I’m going to take you at your word that you aren’t instigating, but make sure you really aren’t. If you give off a low tolerance for drama, it tends to stay away from you. If you are frequently surrounded by drama, you may be doing more to encourage it than you think you are. It’s kind of a low level of the enabling behavior around people who have substance abuse problems.
I don’t see a real problem in enjoying what you see on a message board, even if it gets train-wrecky. Contributing to train wrecks on message boards is trolling if it rises to a significant degree, and around here justice is usually swift.
Harriet, you can sho nuff take me at my word about the instigating. No way. Never. Not in real life, rarely on message boards.
But I definitely provide an audience. If co workers are getting worked up about something, I am all ears, including laughing out loud if they sling any funny barbs at eachother.
I worry that it is indeed a flaw. Because, while I fail miserably by other’s moral compasses, I actually pass pretty damn well by my own. This is bothering me a bit, because it means another behavior that I have to work at curbing, once I decide it is wrong. And I don’t want to. Curb it, that is.
