Lunkheads running the internet, lunkheads running businesses.

[igor_frankensteen]

The world, at leas the US, has been rapidly evolving such that we have to have internet connections to do almost everything. Brick and mortar businesses are dying faster than during an economic collapse, because they can’t compete.

But the people running the 'net AND the businesses trying to use it, seem to be populated by complete thick-headed, unimaginative and inattentive buffoons.

I am constantly challenged to find a product I need, which by all logic should be readily available, but I can’t locate it because either the search engines (Google especially) are incapable of selecting exactly what I tell it to search for, or because the businesses which may or may not be selling what I need, fail to put critical information in their advertisements.

Examples include clothing sellers, who offer “small medium and large” designations, but fail to show that they are aware that no agreed upon standard exists, for what those terms mean. Another I just struggled with, is that I want to buy a hamburger meat press, which will make burgers larger than four inches in diameter. In addition to Google calling up EVERY burger press when I specify a large size, the businesses themselves who want me to buy their products, fail to put any specifications as to size on their pages, even when they title their press as being for LARGE burgers. Since anyone who has been on Earth for more than twenty minutes knows that EVERY business claims to offer “large” things, no matter how big they actually are, failure to publish actual dimensions is an act of complete nitwittery.

Only one recent dramatic and welcome “advance” I’ve observed: when I was searching for a television to fit a specific limited space a few years ago, I couldn’t find even a SINGLE MAKER who gave any dimensions other than screen diagonal. Recently, many of them have listed the actual dimensions of the complete TV, so that I can now finally buy the one I want. But they still fail to provide other fundamentally important things to a world where products can no longer be found in a store: no listings or photographs of the connectors on the back, to allow someone who wants to do more than watch over-the-air channels to choose other components.

It’s the insistent idiocy that annoys me the most. I can only assume that no one who owns these businesses, ever actually uses any of the products they purvey.

[Cat_Whisperer]

I’ll piggyback onto your rant to add businesses that don’t have an internet presence (if I do a search for local lawn mower repair shops, and you don’t come up, I’m not making any other effort to find you), businesses that make it difficult to contact them over the internet (a “Contact Us” page that lists only a phone number, not an email address), and businesses that don’t respond to emails. These are bare minimums for running a business these days - they are NOT optional.

ETA: Also, businesses that make their webpages so difficult to navigate. Don’t hide the things customers frequently look for under tab after tab - build your websites from the customer’s perspective, of what they’re looking for.

[Gatopescado]

First World Problems, Man.

Just think, somewhere in the world, right now, someone doesn’t have clean water to drink.

[Roderick_Femm]

@Gatopescado

First World Problems, Man.

Just think, somewhere in the world, right now, someone doesn’t have clean water to drink.

And here you have the textbook example of a thread-shitting post. IMHO of course. YMMV. Not ROFLMAO.

[Gatopescado]

@Cat_Whisperer

I’ll piggyback onto your rant to add businesses that don’t have an internet presence (if I do a search for local lawn mower repair shops, and you don’t come up, I’m not making any other effort to find you),…

Missed this the first time…

Funny you should mention lawn mower repair place. I have a logsplitter with a Briggs & Stratton 6 hp engine I would rent to people. Well, the rod broke, and I needed to get it fixed ASAP. I called the local small engine repair place and they told me there was a month waiting list.

This business does not need a website. They need more skilled techs.

@Roderick_Femm

And here you have the textbook example of a thread-shitting post. IMHO of course. YMMV. Not ROFLMAO.

Fuck you! It’s the Pit! I can’t sympathize with someone who can’t get his hands on the exact little thing they want using the goddamn World Wide Web. Life is fucking hard!

Actually, I agree with most of the OP. Most things suck.

[igor_frankensteen]

@Cat_Whisperer

I’ll piggyback onto your rant to add businesses that don’t have an internet presence (if I do a search for local lawn mower repair shops, and you don’t come up, I’m not making any other effort to find you), businesses that make it difficult to contact them over the internet (a “Contact Us” page that lists only a phone number, not an email address), and businesses that don’t respond to emails. These are bare minimums for running a business these days - they are NOT optional.

ETA: Also, businesses that make their webpages so difficult to navigate. Don’t hide the things customers frequently look for under tab after tab - build your websites from the customer’s perspective, of what they’re looking for.

Right on the target I’m pointing at. It’s the insanity of running a business, and at least nominally expecting to sell things to people, but not bothering to make it possible for us to actually get anything from them, that makes me the most nuts.

[Channing_Idaho_Banks]

Some businesses won’t even answer the phone.

[bump]

@Cat_Whisperer

ETA: Also, businesses that make their webpages so difficult to navigate. Don’t hide the things customers frequently look for under tab after tab - build your websites from the customer’s perspective, of what they’re looking for.

I think maybe you’re asking a bit too much of small scale business owners. First, some guy who’s a small engine repairman is supposed to be somehow internet savvy enough to know that he needs an internet presence, when in all likelihood, most of his business is in repairing commercial account stuff and selling new equipment to them.

And then on top of it, you’re expecting this guy to have the knowledge to choose a competent website designer on top of it, so that his website isn’t hard to navigate? All on the assuredly limited budget of a small engine repair shop?

Somehow I think that’s an awfully tall order.

[erysichthon]

@Cat_Whisperer

I’ll piggyback onto your rant to add businesses that don’t have an internet presence (if I do a search for local lawn mower repair shops, and you don’t come up, I’m not making any other effort to find you), businesses that make it difficult to contact them over the internet (a “Contact Us” page that lists only a phone number, not an email address), and businesses that don’t respond to emails. These are bare minimums for running a business these days - they are NOT optional.

Don’t forget businesses with websites that haven’t been updated in years. They heard somewhere that businesses need websites, so they paid someone to set it up and promptly forgot about it. What FUN finding a business that provides the exact service you’re looking for, sending them a polite email query, and getting a curt “We don’t do that anymore” reply.

Of course, if you point out that their website says otherwise, you’ll be hear “What website?” or “Our Facebook page is our website now.”

[ticker]

There are several hamburger presses on amazon which go to 4 1/2 inch diameter and at least one5-incher.

[dalej42]

@erysichthon

Don’t forget businesses with websites that haven’t been updated in years. They heard somewhere that businesses need websites, so they paid someone to set it up and promptly forgot about it. What FUN finding a business that provides the exact service you’re looking for, sending them a polite email query, and getting a curt “We don’t do that anymore” reply.

Of course, if you point out that their website says otherwise, you’ll be hear “What website?” or “Our Facebook page is our website now.”

I’ve always found it interesting to visit some restaurant websites and find they’re still listing their St Patrick’s Day specials…in May.

[Roderick_Femm]

@Gatopescado

Fuck you! It’s the Pit! I can’t sympathize with someone who can’t get his hands on the exact little thing they want using the goddamn World Wide Web. Life is fucking hard!

Actually, I agree with most of the OP. Most things suck.

You make my point for me. Again.

[TruCelt]

I’ll add business that don’t supply a bricks-and-mortar address on their webpage. I buy services for US Government customers. These are big purchases, the kind that can turn a small business into a large business. But before I can include you on the bidder’s list, I have a few due diligence steps to go through, including running your credit info.

If you can’t be troubled to list a headquarters address somewhere on your website, and your Contact page just has a box I can type into, with no phone number, or even vision into the e-mail address I’m posting to? You just missed a Prime opportunity, my friend. And I don’t feel one bit sorry for you.

[Gatopescado]

@Roderick_Femm

You make my point for me. Again.

Hey, you drink as much as I do, and see if you can make fucking sense. Knock Cobbler!

[Beware_of_Doug]

@Gatopescado

First World Problems, Man.

Just think, somewhere in the world, right now, someone doesn’t have clean water to drink.

Because that’s just another thing that doesn’t make anyone any money. Kind of like the information 1st world consumers want from business lunkheads.

[Superdude]

@Gatopescado

First World Problems, Man.

Just think, somewhere in the world, right now, someone doesn’t have clean water to drink.

Flint, Michigan isn’t part of the First World anymore?

[Jackmannii]

@Cat_Whisperer

…businesses that make it difficult to contact them over the internet (a “Contact Us” page that lists only a phone number, not an email address)

Not to mention gummed-up professional society websites that do the exact same thing, requiring you to go through call waiting hell to ask for help after their site fails to handle those obscure browsers, Firefox and IE.

And what moron designs a website that invites you to click a box to get somewhere you need to go, which when clicked doesn’t actually take you there, but instead shows you a smaller box which has to be clicked to get to your destination, but which when clicked gives you a Page Not Found error.

Dingbats.

[iamthewalrus_3]

We all know that when we go to a restaurant’s website, we really want to read about how the chef had a vision for the kind of cuisine and atmosphere he wanted to create. You know, something sustainable and healthful, but grounded in tradition and family. Put that shit right front and center. Ideally with lots of pictures of ingredients so we all remember what a bell pepper looks like when it’s cut in half.

No one cares where the restaurant is or when it’s open. You can put that in the footer of like the 4th tab in a tiny font. If possible, make it an image of text, so they can’t copy the address to set it as their gps destination.

Also, the menu should use custom fonts in a pdf. Or low-quality high resolution photographs of a menu five years out of date. If there aren’t seven serifs on the headings, can it really be called a menu? If you have to put the contents in actual html, try to split it over as many different pages as possible. One dynamic expandable sub-page for each dish would be great. The point is to make it as hard to read as possible. Otherwise people will have nothing to do for the first few minutes at the restaurant (if they figure out where it is).

[Evan_Drake]

@Jackmannii

Not to mention gummed-up professional society websites that do the exact same thing, requiring you to go through call waiting hell to ask for help after their site fails to handle those obscure browsers, Firefox and IE.

And what moron designs a website that invites you to click a box to get somewhere you need to go, which when clicked doesn’t actually take you there, but instead shows you a smaller box which has to be clicked to get to your destination, but which when clicked gives you a Page Not Found error.

Dingbats.

Better that than those drooling morons who instead of a wretched 404 simply, and vacantly, whisk one straight to their fucking home page.
At which point I leave, never to return.

[Mtgman]

@Superdude

Flint, Michigan isn’t part of the First World anymore?

Hasn’t been for a while I’m afraid. Poor bastards.

Enjoy,
Steven