Lyle Overbay Fucking Sucks, As Do MAny Goatfelching Blue Jays

Cafe Society
1

Jesus Christ in a chicken basket but am I sick of fucking Lyle Overbay, aka Lyle Overpaid. Two on, nobody out, the A’s on the ropes and of course Lyle Doubleplay hits into a 6-4-3, exactly as I knew he would.

Naturally, our dumbfuck general manager decided to give Lyle TwoWhiffsADay a multi-year contract right after he had what was obviously a fluke career year last year. That’s fucking great. We thought we were getting a Moneyball GM, but what we got was a WasteLotsOfMoneyOnGuysWhoHadFlukeYearsBall. Now we’re stuck for the next three fucking years with a first baseman who bats .250 and can’t lay off the off speed pitch. Just to balance out his game, he’s also started making more errors.

Lyle Overpaid is my current pissoff, but we have so many more wasting money at Rogers Centre. They’re also stuck through 2008 with a DH with a bad back who’s turning 40 soon. They also gave $126 million to a guy who’s pretty good but not really any better than most center fielders. We’re paying $13 million a year to A.J. Burnett, who comes down with a phantom arm injury twice every year. The GM’s obsessed with playing a shortstop who can’t hit, is committed to a 37-year-old career backup catcher who’s batting .225 to be the starter, and is apparently expressing enormous surprise that the outfielder who hit about 40 points over his career norma in 2006 has (Surprise!) reverted to his usual performance this year. Oh, and the lumbering third baseman with foot problems is breaking down, which you would expect from a 30-year-old lumbering third baseman with foot problems. Quelle fucking surprise.

But let’s get back to Lyle LookIt’sAK. Could you at least fucking try to LOOK like yu’re swinging the bat hard? Every swing now is a weak flick-uppercut, way ahead of the ball, almost invariably resulting in a dribbly ground ball at the second baseman. He looks worse than bad; he looks like he’s lost interest now that he has a contract.

Basically, we have Roy Halladay, a few young pitchers, and Alex Rios. We’re fucked.

This team is fucking doomed. It’s going back to 1996-1997. They’ll be 73-89 every year with some good pitching and the worst offense in the league.

Fuck these stupid assholes.

2

[kidding]Thats what you get for getting emotionally involved with a sports team. [/just kidding!!]

3

I want credit for not mentioning last week when the A’s went into Toronto and slapped the Blue Jays around like they were a bunch of little girls for three straight games.

Oh…wait…

At least tonight’s game is going to extra innings. There’s still a chance, right?

The game’s not on local TV here, so I’m just getting updates via Yahoo! I probably won’t even know it until well after the A’s score the winning run on a throwing error by the Jays’ infield, or some weird shit like that.

Enjoy!

4

Wow, spoilers galore for this TiVo user!

Extra innings, eh? Cool :cool:

5

Tigers took the series from the evil Yankees. Things are looking up.

6

You need to go even further back. Man, go put on your Joe Carter jammies, say good night to your Paul Molitor, Devon White and Kelly Gruber bobblehead dolls, clutch your Tom Henke teddy bear in your little fists, turn out the light with the Roberto Alomar light shade, say a prayer to Saint Cito and to the original holy trio – George, Floyd and Jesse – and dream sweet dreams of better days.

7

Rick, while you have my sympathy, can you confine your use of the f-word to the Pit, where this type of thread language belongs?

8

He can’t say “fuck”?

9

Is this guy’s real name Lyle Bover?

10

Tell us how you really feel.

11

Hey, it could be worse. You could be a Texas Rangers fan. At least the Blue Jays have played for, and won the WS.

12

Just for the record, I was listening to last night’s game after I shut down the computer. I turned it off as soon as Glaus drove in the two runs that won the game–knew the game was over at that point. I don’t want to see the A’s lose, but I’ll consider it a game well spent if a Blue Jays win helps keep RickJay’s blood pressure down.

13

Sniff sniff
*
That was beautiful man. *

I had high hopes for the Jays with the new owners and they who shall not be named in New York all growing old.

Wait till next year!

14

I’ve taken to calling Ricciardi “Cyril Sneer.”