‘Will Smith don’t gotta cuss in his raps to sell records’;
well I do, so fuck him and fuck you too!
- Eminem "The Real Slim Shady "
"Yeah, my blood’s so mad feels like coagulatin’
I’m sitting here just contemplatin’’
Barry McGuire- Eve of Destruction
I’ve got a bike
You can ride it if you like
Its got a basket a bell that rings and things that make it look good
I’d give it to you if I could but I borrowed it.
- Bike, Pink Floyd
The sunshine bores the daylights out of me.
- Rocks Off, Rolling Stones
It turns girls on that I’m mysterious
I tell 'em I don’t want nothing serious
'cause even on a slow day I can have a three way
Chat with two women at one time
I’m so much cooler online
-Online, Brad Paisley
Pretty much every Lil Wayne song.
Example from “6 Foot 7 Foot”:
“mind so sharp, I f-ck around and cut my head off
real n-gga all day and tomorrow
but these muthaf-ckas talking crazy like they jaw broke”
“people say I’m borderline crazy, sorta kinda
woman of my dreams, I don’t sleep so I can’t find her
you n-ggas are gelatin, peanuts to an elephant
I got through that sentence like a subject and a predicate”
I never saw that cold equation algebra behind your face.
That wrote me off as a bad transaction. Your abacus spoke deadly sense.
-Chinatown Calculation, Doug & The Slugs
Well, I’ve been a jolly tinker
For forty years or more
Oh, but such a rusty hole as that
I never blocked before
Well, indeed I didn’t
Don’t you know I didn’t?
To me rightful loora laddie
Well, indeed I didn’t
-The Jolly Tinker
We had five million hogs,
And six million dogs,
Seven million barrels of porter.
We had eight million sides of poor blind horses’ hides
In the hold of the Irish Rover.
-The Irish Rover
Put away with your pills, it’ll cure all ills,
Be ye Pagan, Christian or Jew,
Take off your coat and grease your throat
With a bucket of the Mountain Dew.
-Mountain Dew
When they see us coming, the birdies all try and hide,
but they still go for peanuts when coated with cyanide!
Poisoning Pigeons In The Park, by Prof. Tom Lehrer
Everything he sings makes me smile!
“Really love your peaches want to shake your tree.”
~ The Joker (Steve Miller Band)
“I’m long distance to my girl and I’m talking on the cellular,
She said that she was sorry and I said, yeah, the hell you were.”
– Beastie Boys
About every other line on that album, really.
I wouldn’t have to work on a sex farm, woman, if you’d gimme some money.
Syd Barrett’s whole Effervescing Elephant song, but particularly this stretch that shouldn’t work musically, but does.
Oh yeah!
And the message was spread
And the zebra, mongoose, and the dirty hippopotamus who
Wallowed in the mud and chewed
His spicy hippo-plankton food
And tended to ignore the word
Preferring to survey a herd
Of stupid water bison
Oh yeah!
Beastie Boys Intergalactic:
*When I wrote graffiti my name was Slop
If my rap’s soup my beats is stock
Step from the tables as I start to chop
I’m a lumber jack DJ Adrock
If you try to knock me you’ll get mocked
I’ll stir fry you in my wok
Your knees’ll start shaking and your fingers pop
Like a pinch on the neck from Mr. Spock *
Maybe, if you wouldn’t break like the wind.
You two need to have some cups and cakes already…what a gay time it will be!
John Prine - “Fish & Whistle”
Father forgive us for what we must do
You forgive us, we’ll forgive you
We’ll forgive each other ‘till we both turn blue
then we’ll whistle & go fishin’ in heaven
Also a hearty second (or third or whatever) for “Cover of the Rolling Stone”
" I shoot an arrow like cupid,
I use a word that don’t mean nuttin, like lupid"
Humpty Dance
By Humpty Hump
“Give me a sister, I can’t resist 'er, red beans and rice didn’t miss her.”
Baby Got Back
By Sir Mix-alot
Also: “So your girlfriend rolls a Honda, playing workout tapes by Fonda, but Fonda ain’t got a motor in the back of her Honda, my anaconda don’t want none unless you got buns, hon”
Bleating and babbling we fell on his neck with a scream…
Wave upon wave of demented avengers ride cheerfully out of obscurity into the dream.
Have you heard the news? The dogs are dead!
You better stay home and do as your told
Get out of the road if you wanna grow old.
Pink Floyd: Animals - Sheep
I always get a wry smile on my face at the end of this wonderful album…
The imagery of the sheep turning on the wolf in a violent display is simply awesome.
“Another mule is kickin’ in your stall.”
Muddy Waters - Long Distance Call.
Sundays: I kicked a Boy
“When the weather’s fine, when it’s sunny outside
Think about the time I kicked a boy till he cried”
sung in possibly one of the sweetest voices to ever grace alternative pop.