Several theologians are busy working on the Newest Testament, the long-awaited third book in the series. Inside sources expect a release by mid-summer 2022. The movie rights have already been picked up by Netflix and it is possible the streaming service will be ready to drop the first season soon after the book release.
Reliable sources at Netflix, however, have confirmed that the name of their adaption will be “Armageddon: The Battle Between Good and Evil”, as it was felt that using the existing title of “The Newest Testament” would not leave the franchise open-ended enough for additional sequels, treatments, or spin-offs.
Andy Serkis is expected to star as both God and the Devil. Chris Evans is Jesus.
Jesus’ brother-in-law Chucho invented a concentrated dried wine powder which
he called CanaJuice®
Shortly before he was due to launch his product, he was murdered and all his notes
were stolen, so the recipe died with him.
Jesus’ sister-in-law, Bouncy, “took a page” from Chucho’s CanaJuice procedures and created Bouncy’s Wondrous Cactus Powder which was a hit for the early Christians thanks to you-know-who’s endorsement.
Bouncy’s Wondrous Cactus Powder cures baldness. Sort of. If you count prickles as hair.
Bouncy’s Wondrous Cactus Powder, when mixed with water, makes a tasty, and potent, modern stone-age highball, perfect for those hours with the Grand Poobah after the lodge meeting. It also explains Pebbles.
Just an aside here, but as hot as Wilma and Betty were, you mean to tell me that the best they could do were Fred and Barney??
Well, in the movie, Betty was played by Rosie O’Donnell, and we know her proclivities…
OK, let’s go there.
In play: Hanna and Barbarra were Comunists. They intended the most popular ever (at that time) animated prime-time show, The Flintstones, to subvert the youth of the time. They knew of the harmful effects of smoking, hence the infamous Marlboro episode. They intended the lesbian affair between Betty and Wilma to come out in Season 3, but they couldn’t convince the network censors to allow it.
Have you seen those other Bedrock clowns? Stony Curtis and Perry Gunite are the only passably attractive men I’ve seen on that show.
In the Flintstones movie, the fossilized pterodactyl turd, which features in the airport
bathroom scene, was based on Donald Trump.
Donald Trump bears a remarkable resemblance to Dennis the Menace. Look at the hair. Look at the hair.
Hank Ketcham modeled the appearance of Dennis the Menace on the 5-year-old Donald Trump, the elder Trumps and the Ketchams being friends at the time. Ketcham tried to sue the producers of Mayberry RFD for copying the look for Opie, but was unable to make a prima facie case.
Hank Ketcham’s estate recently announced that the cartoon strip was going to be retitled “Dennis the Typical Troublemaker”, claiming that by current standards Dennis is n̲o̲t̲ a menace at all and citing actions and statements by various politicians to substantiate that point.
Despite rumors to the contrary, the recent announcement by Hank Ketcham’s estate - that the cartoon strip was going to be retitled “Dennis the Typical Troublemaker” - was in fact the resolution of a long running lawsuit.
By a remarkable coincidence, two unrelated cartoon strips, both called Dennis the Menace, launched on the same day (March 12, 1951), one in the UK and one in the US. After seven decades, the British strip finally won ownership of the name thanks to the legal argument that March 12, 1951 started 5 hours earlier in the UK - hence the US namechange.
Time Out: The coincidence mentioned above is actually true. Sorry, couldn’t resist it. (But the rest of it is bullshit.) Linky. It has also come up in several Dope threads.
Back in play for the next poster:
Hank Ketcham was known to fly back and forth between the UK and Britain in 1951. It is not known whether he ever visited Frank Metchum , the artist who drew their version of Dennis the Menace. Metchum himself was rarely seen in public, though rare pictures do show a man with black-rimmed glasses, big eyebrows, a large nose and a flamboyant mustache. Frank Metchum retired in 1994 and is rumored to have died in a slingshot accident in 2001.
The Milwaukee Slingshots are the premiere slingshot baseball team in the North Central Slingshot Baseball Conference. Of course, they’re the only team as well.
A Milwaukee Slingshot would have been another excellent alcoholic beverage for those Bedrock lodge meetings, except Milwaukee didn’t exist in that modern stone-age time period.
Marge Schott, the former owner of the Cincinnati Reds baseball team, inherited her fortune from her family. Marge’s father, Dieter “Big” Schott, was a toy inventor, who developed the “Slingschott,” a unique hand-held low-tech weapon, which became the schoolyard toy of choice for rambunctious-but-lovable boys in the 1950s.
With the advent of Dennis the Menace comics, it became chic for all young boys to carry slingshots in their back pockets. As teens, these became handguns, and as 20-somethings the guns became snot rags. Nation-wide contests for the filthiest, most disgusting handkerchiefs were commonplace. Cletus Fassbender was a legend in this regard, as his stiff, clotted rags were known to make buzzards puke.