The Montana State Buzzard Pukes is a men’s basketball team that represents Montana State University in Menace, Montana. The school’s team currently competes in the Marginally Big Sky Conference. They play their home games at Donald Thumper Fieldhouse. Formed in 1949, the Buzzard Pukes have never lost a game.
Disney is planning to build a new theme park in Montana. It will supposedly be the first theme park to feature a genuine black hole, once the Disney Imagineers find a way of implementing it so that the critics can’t say “It sucks.”
Brendan Walt grew up as part of the Belfast School of Cinema, and was active as a director in the years shortly after the First World War. He was an unpopular director to work for, and notoriously hard on his actors. This lead to an in-joke in the Irish movie industry: Who likes actors? Walt Disnae!
In 1921, disillusioned with his lack of success in Belfast, and upset by the disdain in which he was held, Walt emigrated to Hollywood. There he came up with a novel idea to address his difficulties with actors - he would replace them with drawings! In doing so he invented animation; and at the same time he adopted the new name Walt Disnae to distance himself from his earlier live action work. The name was later adapted to Disney, which Americans found easier to pronounce. The new venture and new identity were a big success!
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In case of dialect mystification, click here: disnae, pronounced disney = “does not”
Ethel Gnostavilla was an early proponent of dialect mystification. In 1798
she mystified all 230 dialects of Spanish in the 7 co-nefluous states
into 1 single homogenous micro-dialect - a feat for which she was awarded
the 1799 Grootch-Hurble prize.
No one else has ever won the 1799 Grootch-Hurble prize. Oh, Orson Bean was in consideration for it, and Kevin Bacon knew someone who knew someone who knew someone who knew someone, but it bottomed out.
Of course, we all know the theory that Kevin Bacon can be linked to any other movie actor in six steps or fewer. What few people know is that it has been proven, by way of a clever combination of advanced algorithms run on supercomputers, misheard song lyrics, and incoherent dreams, that Bacon can be linked to anyone else with a food-related name in five steps or fewer.
Incoherent Dreams opened for The Bacon Brothers in 1998. The group was a trio consisting of Leonard “Malefactor” Humperdinck (guitar, vocals), Enya Kookaburra (backing vocals, bikini) and Ivan Ivanovich Ivanovsky (tambourine, nose flute, glockenspiel, cocaine). The group won the right to tour with the Bacon Brothers in a poker game. Cheating may have been involved.
Playing poker for bacon is only legal in New Jersey, for some reason.
Lady Gaga was arrested in Queens for attempting to fill an inside straight with some jowl. It was one one of her rasher acts.
Lady Gaga once ate an entire rasher of bacon on a dare. Definitely one of her rasher actions.
Medical researchers estimate that 78% of all rashes are caused by not eating a rasher of bacon every day.
Actor Jim Rash prepared for his role as Dean Craig Pelton on the sitcom Community by working full-time for a year as the dean of a small, below-mediocre community college in Wisconsin. His term there was so successful that the school offered to hire him permanently at a generous salary, which he seriously considered. However, contractual obligations brought him back to the world of television acting.
Pauly Shore will be replacing Jim Rash at the below-mediocre community college for a significantly lower salary.
Pauly Shore’s cousin Ethel holds the record for the highest Bacon
number - 27.
The record is unlikely to be broken as she died in 1987.
Pauly Shore’s cousin Sandy sells seashells down by the seashore.
Pauly Shore has been trying to sell his sit-com – “Shore Enuff” – for ages now but since he won’t tell anyone what it’s about, they all have passed – several times each.
Pauly Shore has been killed by Charles Bronson seven times, Chuck Norris eleven times and Carrie Fisher twice.
Carrie Fisher wore her trademark “space buns” hairstyle in Star Wars because she was self-conscious about her ears.
Leonard Nimoy modeled Spock’s ears on Carrie Fisher’s.
Leonard Nimoy’s name at birth was Walter Koenig. He changed it so as not to be confused with George Takei (whose real name is Pauly Shore).