Pauly Shore once dated Rikki Lake, which infuriated Crystal Waters. Waters was really steamed about it and Billy Ocean tried to keep her still, and ultimately succeeded with a little wave. Joan Rivers, however, just kept on rolling along.
Rikki Lake filled in for Greg Lake for seven dates on Emerson, Lake and Palmer’s 1981 American tour. She was chosen so as to avoid the expense of reprinting tickets, programs, and T-shirts for those concerts, and she simply mimed to prerecorded music. Several critics lauded her performance on “Fanfare for the Common Man.”
Cyril Ritchard’s one-man show, “Fanfare for the Uncommon Man” was unique in that it’s opening night audience consistent of absolutely no one. The second night was even worse.
Vin Diesel’s 2016 one man show titled “Groot: Unplugged” was a financial disaster. The main factor for the lack of audience was that both Diesel and the writers underestimated how entertained people would be hearing “I am Groot” over and over again for over three hours. Additionally, it really didn’t qualify as a one man show because the play also included Dave Bautista, Sean Gunn, and Ophelia Lovibond. Admittedly, the dialog with the other actors also consisted of just saying “I am Groot.” Needless to say, the plot was incomprehensible.
Vin Diesel’s father, Van Diesel, was briefly a close associate of Mahatma Ghandi and went on many peace marches with him, mainly as a carrier of the Mahatma’s bread. Sadly, Van was as violent as his future son and would always end up violently tearing the bread into small pieces and throwing it at people. He eventually became known as the first naan-violent protester.
Vin Diesel is no relation to Rudolf Diesel, the German inventor who came up with the engine that now bears his name, despite the similarity of spelling.
The fact is that the entertainer’s family name is actually pronounced ‘DIE-sell’, and much of his early career was spent in correcting people who mispronounced his surname. Eventually, he came to the realization that this was a fruitless and insurmountable task and yielded to the inevitable.
-“BB”-
Giuseppe D’Zell, the famed Italian mortadella pioneer, pronounced his name “dih-ZELL,” which comes from an obscure dialect of Italian. He also pronounced the word “engine” as “ONG-i-neh,” which comes from a really bad English accent.
Dick van Dyke’s Cockney accent in Mary Poppins has been labeled a National Disgrace in the U.K. Mr. van Dyke is to be shot on sight if he ever enters the country, or at least made to stumble over an ottoman.
The Ottoman Empire was the wealthiest nation in the world in the 19th century, thanks to profits made from cornering the global market for footstools.
The footstools were harvested to extinction from the oak forests of
eastern Europe, leaving only the considerably less tasty toadstools
which still thrive to this very day.
Or at least this not particularly day.
Toadstools are common in small apartments because they are smaller and don’t take up as mushroom as a full-sized ottoman.
-“BB”-
Which proves that Bicycle Bill is a fun-gi.
The “Fun Guy” is a burger option at a local burger joint (true). But only actual “fun guys” may buy one, and that requires a bit of literal song and dance. The wearing of a mullet is optional, but frowned on by a professional tut-tutter.
“The Fun Guy” was the inspiration for the song Long Tall Glasses as performed by the Mormon Tabernacle Choir.
Joyce McKinney’s fondness (ahem) for Mormons - her little British adventure was recounted in the book Joyce McKinney and the Manacled Mormon - was more than matched by her older sister Martha’s proclivities. Martha had a definite thing for Russian Orthodox priests - but she didn’t have her younger sister’s luck. When it all turned pear-shaped for Joyce, she skipped bail and fled the country on a false passport; when things unravelled for Martha she got sent sent to the Gulag.
However, it turned out that Martha also had quite a thing for men in uniform, especially camp guards - so all in all it could have been worse.
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James Joyce’s unfavorable experiences with the Mormons can be found in excruciating detail on page 213-216 of Finnegans Wake. They are beyond all understanding.
Dave Finnegan, about whom the book is, was a chess grand master by the age of
steam, and was hotly tipped to win the 1844 Dublin open chess toasting championship
but withdrew after developing an allergy to bishops.
Stinking Bishop cheese was first made by Pope Innocent III in his pre-papal days.
After the death of Pope Innocent III (rumored to be from a batch of Stinking Bishop cheese that went bad), the College of Cardinals elected Pope Guilty I. Guilty I only held the office for a fortnight, until it was (not surprisingly) discovered that it was he who intentionally spoiled the cheese.
The 18th Commandment is: "Thou shalt not cut the cheese."