This is good too! I guess repetition is key. I will just have to keep at it till it sticks…
honestly I’m more terrified of making a mistake and having our surgeon request a quality assurance evaluation of my work vs a patient complaining that I’m not talkative/boring/rude etc. I do not want to be put on ‘that’ list. Our Chatty Cathy has patients request only her, bring her home baked treats etc. little do they know that she’s so busy entertaining them, other people are sometimes asked to double check or redo her exams prior surgical intervention
Yeah some people are ‘talkers’, and are able to get through everything without the possibility of missing anything. Not sure what field the tech that’s complaining about pple ignoring them is in, but I obviously fall on the other end of the spectrum! Lol it’s probly the Chatty Cathy from my office over there haha!
At our office we see advanced stages of disease. these conditions are not associated with any stigmas. Sure there are risk factors to avoid, but none that would cause embarrassment.
too ballsy for me, I couldn’t pull that off. I’d feel like I’m confronting them. I guess I need to work on my ability to set those definitive boundaries
I get that it feels that way, and I agree that it is private and that you have absolutely no obligation to tell them anything private.
But at the same time, I think the above is a bit strong.
Your job asks that you spend a pretty long time with another person, engaging in their deeply personal life (ie their body). People seek a bit of humanity, reassurance, normalcy, and reciprocity. I don’t think they want cucumber water. Being in a room with someone for 2 hours, having that person examine you and not having a chat sounds… terrifying… to me. It wouldn’t have to be about your children or relationship. It could be anything. How your knitting is getting on for all I care. How my knitting is getting on. But just in a room with you for a long time, with no conversation? :eek:
It sounds like conversation of some sort is just a part of your job. You’ll have to balance saying “sorry I’m a little distracted, I need to get this right” with the occasional “so, do you have pets?”* (or whatever) if you notice the patient is desperately unhappy and uncomfortable.
Just another thought: would it be possible for you to talk through what you’re doing? It keeps convo going, they know what’s up and it might be less awkward. Might not be possible though, depending on what you’re doing?
*I suggest: “So, have you declawed your pit bull, and are you breeding?” to keep them going
Small talk is a part of any human-focused job. You may not like it, and that’s fine, but it’s still part of the job. Do you think waitstaff really enjoys smiling all day, or that therapists actually enjoy hearing everyone’s mundane problems? Probably not. But creating a warm and comfortable environment is important when working with customers, and for most people human interaction is an important part of that. Of course you don’t have to play along, but that will turn off a certain amount of people, and it shouldn’t be surprising that a certain percentage of people prefer chattier providers.
Family is a common topic because for many people it’s easy common ground- most people have some kind of family. People asking about family aren’t really trying to mine your personal details or dig into sensitive subjects, they just want to find something in common and are going for the low-hanging fruit.
I’d suggest thinking of small talk as a skill that can be improved. Asking questions is a good one- when people ask about you, often they are looking for an excuse to talk about themselves. You may also want to figure out some “safe” topics you can steer the conversation towards. If you don’t want to talk about your family or homeland, try to steer the conversation towards television or sports or whatever. I use an app every morning (the one I use is “Potluck”, but there are others) specifically designed to keep you up to date on small talk conversations.
Seriously though, I’d politely tell them the truth- that you really need to concentrate on their exam because you don’t want to miss anything that might cause them to either need to go to surgery or not. Most people will shut the f–k up tout suite if they hear that, and won’t think you’re being rude.
Then after the exam, chat for a few minutes if you have the time- to sort of prove that you’re not just an unfriendly ass and send them on their way feeling good. The best of both worlds, you know.
I have no problem with the occasional brief chit chat through the exam. My problem is with people that want constant banter.
I had a patient the other day who I chatted with after the test. When I was finished answering her questions I asked ‘is there anything else I can do for you today?’ Lol she asked me I could make her a coffee. I looked at her to see if she was joking, and when I realized she wasn’t I told her that we don’t have coffee, but that we do have water in the waiting room. She gave me an annoyed look! Lol we also have a lady that has complained so much about the standard medical grade hospital gowns that she now brings in her own plush robe and pillow. So I don’t think I was reaching with the cucumber water comment.
Blindsided, I can understand the frustration with the medical industry in USA. Its a real pain to deal with at times, esp in light of the fact that medical personnel are be called upon to do more with less all the time. And that it irks us when our colleagues dont seem to be pulling their fair share of weight by being ChattyCathy’s (yet still get good patient satisfaction scores).
Thats when the Art of Medicine comes into play. It cant just be all science (unless as Arrendajo says, “intubate them” :D) when there are humans involved. Its messy to have to juggle it all, but it makes the job a lot more satisfying if you can empathize and really connect with a patient at the same time you do the technical part. Otherwise, maybe a different field would be a better fit for you. I realize you’re just venting tho.
Bear in mind that some of these people are quite possibly pretty nervous of you. You have a lot of power over them, both in the immediate physical sense and in the more long-term sense that you can have a big impact on their future health. Some of them are probably trying to build up rapport because at some level they feel you’ll be more likely to treat them well if there’s some bond between you.
Saje’s approach is great. It focuses on the fact that you really are doing your best for the patient, and highlights the fact that in order to do your best you need to not get into small talk. They get ressured, you don’t have to get into your personal life. Everyone wins.
It irks that you seem to do a better job, but they like Chatty Cathy better, doesn’t it? Just don’t let it irk you so much you swing too far the other way and hate all conversation.
Speaking from a patient’s PoV, what is an everyday procedure for you can be strange, unfamiliar and sometimes scary to the other person involved. Talking to you and reassuring themselves that you are a compassionate human being is a way for them to relax a bit.
Again, from the patient’s perspective, I totally get that you need to concentrate on what you are doing and a gentle reminder isn’t out of place. Just make the line of communication clear and let them know what’s happening.
^^ good points missred. What about this: if you feel pressured to keep up convo, why not make pertinent comments about the exam, such as, “mmhmm… good heartsounds/lungsounds/whatever … now testing your strength here …” in order to focus on the task and let them know whats going on/reassure them. Just a thought, you probably already do that Im sure.
It’s pretty common in my field to discourage talking during these exams. My technical director gives patients the opportunity to ask questions before starting, then tells them must be quiet for the exam, as talking can interfere with the test. But that they can ask questions after. I try not to be that much if a hard ass, but my point is that is the standard that my manager has set.
No not at all, it’s not a popularity contest. I’d rather be highly regarded by our physicians, all that really matters to them is accuracy and efficiency. They don’t care who miss congeniality is. (As long as there aren’t tons of complaints obviously) as I mentioned earlier, my manager does not allow them to talk during the test, only before/after, and they seem to do just fine.
People (me) may also be talking because they’re nervous and have nothing else to focus on. Medical exams are always scary/nerve wracking and/or uncomfortable. It’s even worse since I don’t have anything else to distract myself with.
too ballsy for me, I couldn’t pull that off. I’d feel like I’m confronting them. I guess I need to work on my ability to set those definitive boundaries
