Mine are simple:
Peel enough potatoes for four generous servings.
Cook until soft in salted water with several crushed cloves of garlic.
Drain and return to a low heat to dry a bit.
Mash the potatoes and garlic cloves, adding:
Serve hot. Enjoy.
(Just curious about your innovative variations on the humble standard.)
What were the odds?! 
I made them for you. They were so good I ate them myself.
I hope they go straight to your hips.
1.) I prefer to just use potatoes, butter, and milk (and get all the lumps out). I’m a purist. Season to taste (everyone varies) with salt, freshly ground pepper, garlic salt.
2.) My grandmother used to make them with lard (!!) instead of butter, and with onions mixed in. Also, big lumps. I didn’t care for them.
3.) One time I attended a dinner where the potatoes were made with Cream Cheese instead of butter. Definitely a different and flavorful experience. It certainly beats lard.
I like to add a turnip or two along with the potatoes.
I wish they would. I don’t have enough hip to hold up my pants. They do go straight to my stomach though.
They aren’t fancy, as Cal mentions above, potatoes, milk, butter, and salt. Hand mashing is a requirement. The key is to avoid overcooking the potatoes and destroying their natural flavor. Slow cooking the potatoes to just the point where they can be mashed retains the flavor. Post mashing low heat can be applied for further cooking if needed.
Anybody ever try adding olive oil, instead of all the butter and milk, etc?
I love olive oil. I love potatoes. But together like that… I just don’t see it working. Just me?
I’ve done it a couple of times with olive oil and chicken stock instead of butter and cream. It was a nice change from the regular method (potatoes, butter, salt and pepper, and garlic about 50% of the time) but not nice enough that it became my go to method.
Yes; potatoes, olive oil, maybe some butter is fairly good. You pass the potatoes through a ricer to remove lumps. You can even start with roasted potatoes instead of boiled. But with out cream, you need some other rich flavor besides oil. I only tried truffles once, and it was great. But morels are almost as good.
Two Thanksgivings ago my sister assigned the mashed potato duties to me. So I used a bag Yukon golds cooked in salted water, and a pound those small red potatoes skin on, and roasted in the oven.
Mashed both separately then mixed them both together. Seasoned with butter, cream, pressed garlic, several generous dollops of Duke’s mayonnaise, and thyme and a whole package of chives. They were awesome.
Mayonnaise! Because why not! 
whipping the boiled potatoes in a mixer while adding milk and butter gives a fluffier texture. My grand mother would mash them a little by hand then let the mixer get them smooth.
Nearly 200 views and not a single post that recommends making them with rendered bacon fat?!
You people disappoint me.
That would probably be excellent.
I’m not that original: Leave skins on, cook then mash with roasted garlic, butter, salt, pepper and cream cheese.
The only problem with this method is that you need to make damn sure you know how much milk to add, and know when to stop mixing. Otherwise, you end up with glue. I went to using a ricer several years ago and I’ll never use a mixer again. Press the spuds through and no lumps, ever. Add a bit of 1/2 & 1/2 and some butter, fold it in, and you’re done.
My usual mashed potatoes are nothing out of the ordinary, but I did experiment recently when we had a lactose intolerant dinner guest - I replaced the milk with coconut milk (and left out the butter, which I’ve been doing anyway for health reasons). It wasn’t too bad - I’d eat it again.
+1 on the ricer. The only way to go.
I am pretty much a purist too: potatoes, butter and milk, salt and pepper to taste. Whipped until light and creamy. It really isn’t necessary to do more, and I resent anyone who tries to put potato skins, garlic, chives or anything else in there…
Sometimes, I’ll get extra creaminess by using cream or evaporated milk if we have those.
My family used to add Jack cheese for special events like Thanksgiving, but I’m surrounded by people who don’t appreciate that, so I haven’t done it for a while.