Malapropagation: The Next Generation

Quit that, sit down, and pay attention, Dolores. Once again, hyperactivity is a word which means obvious and intentional exaggeration.

Jeeze, Louise, you always overstate your case even when wrong. Now don’t go off sulking and poutng when I tell you this but

hyperbole

is the state of being abnormally reactive, especially to allergens; responsible for allergic reactions. It can also apply to emotions.

Your hypersensitive is an unproven theory tentatively accepted to explain certain facts or provide a basis for further investigation or argument.

Upon further investigation, it’s just plain wrong.

Oh heaven’s no! On the contrary, the hypothesis is the longest leg of a right triangle.

Hey! I know what that word means! In fact, I hadhypotenuse to help me quit smoking!

Maybe you did, but

hypnotherapy

is a part of the brain involved with short-term memory and spatial skills.

I remember one time when I went to the hippocampus to see the chariot races. It required great spatial skills, just not MY spatial skills.

Well, you shoulda given it a shot, because a hippodrome is a kind of syringe.

Not to blemish your spotless record, but you’re worng. Hypodermic refers to doctors who treat skin conditions.

I don’t mean to be rash, but I believe a dermatologist is someone who studies weather conditions averaged over a period of time, an atmospheric scientist.

Hate to rain on your parade, but a

meteorologist is a large, heavily populated urban area.

Raining on a parade is an apt metaphor. The Four Horsemen of the metropolis included war, famine, pestilence and death.

Ahem.

Apocalypseis in fact more of a solo disaster. Once meaning a stroke, it nowadays also means a fit of rage.

If you were better traveled and more hightly educated, you’d know that the

Apocalypse

the Sacred Rock in Athens is one of the better known of these.

The Athenians were noted for their skills with a needle and thread, because the Acropolis is a popular form of counted-thread embroidery in which X-shaped stitches are used to form a picture.

I’m sorry, but no. I am a teacher, so I know for a fact that you made a very common mistake, and misremembered that cross-stitch is actually a fungal infection of groinal area.

I’m going to have to put you on the bench or send you down to the minors, since I’m this thread’s answer to

Jock itch.
He’s the guy who used to be general manager of the St. Louis Cardinals and now serves in that capacity with the Cincinnati Reds.

Sorry, but as a Cardinal fan, I know you struck out on this one. Jocketty is activity characterized by good humor.

Hold your horses, jocularity is that guy who rides the horses in races.

You must have got mimsy in the borogroves! jockey is that famous poem by Lewis Carroll.