http://cafejunky.com/this-womans-husband-got-banned-from-walmart-and-the-reasons-why-are-epic/?utm_campaign=ServeSpring_1568&utm_source=4604&utm_medium=cpc
This guy is awesome
From the letter from Walmart…
May 16, 2014: Went to the Service Desk and tried to reserve a bag of chips.
May 25, 2014: Set all the alarm clocks in Housewares to go off at 5-minute intervals.
June 9, 2014: Left a trail of tomato juice on the floor leading to the women’s restroom.
June 21, 2014: Walked up to an employee and told her in an official voice, “Code 3 in Housewares. Get on it right away”. This caused the employee to leave her assigned station and receive a reprimand from her Supervisor.
July 4, 2014: Took 24 boxes of condoms and randomly put them in other people’s carts when they weren’t looking.
July 12, 2014: Darted around the Store suspiciously while loudly humming the “Mission Impossible” theme.
August 2, 2014: Set up a tent in the camping department and told the children shoppers they could come in if they would bring pillows and blankets from the bedding department – to which twenty children obliged.
August 7, 2014: When a clerk asked if they could help him he began crying and screamed, “Why can’t you people just leave me alone?” Emergency Medics were called.
August 19, 2014: Looked right into the security camera and used it as a mirror while he picked his nose.
September 2, 2014: While handling guns in the Sports department, he asked the clerk where the antidepressants were.
September 17, 2014: Moved a “CAUTION – WET FLOOR” sign to a carpeted area.
October 3, 2014: In the auto department, he practiced his “Madonna look” by using different sizes of funnels.
October 14, 2014: Took a box of condoms to the checkout clerk and asked where the fitting room was.
October 19, 2014: When an announcement came over the loud speaker, he assumed the fetal position and screamed “OH NO! IT’S THOSE VOICES AGAIN!”
October 23, 2014: Hid in a clothing rack and when people browsed through, yelled “PICK ME! PICK ME!”
October 25, 2014: Went into a fitting room, shut the door, waited awhile, and then yelled very loudly, “Hey! There’s no toilet paper in here.”
My parents used to to the alarm clock thing. Back when there were a lot more of them! Sometimes set for different times, sometimes all at once.
Lol…they must have been fun parents
Unless he was inspired by the list from this Snopes article, it’s false.
You guys ruin all the fun
This is SO cool. I’ve printed out the list and am starting tomorrow!
JcWoman
October 17, 2015, 11:18am
8
Love his antics except for the last one. I’ve heard stories (notalwaysright.com ) about people doing this for real and leaving the store staff to clean up.
Though I guess it wasn’t his work (they’d source it if it was), it does kind of sound like a Dave Barry column.
BigT
October 17, 2015, 12:12pm
10
The guy wouldn’t just be banned. There’s enough damage to property in there that the cops would be called.
Not sure about the other things, but is it legal to touch the alarm clocks & set them off when you aren’t going to buy but just leave them there?
I personally wouldn’t want to be acquainted with this guy. Too annoying.
Took another look at the OP’s link. Notice the letter only shows the top part. You depend on the article to fill in all the details.
Just as fake as the original story on Snopes.
Is this a nomination for “passive-aggressive dick of the year” award or something?
Thank God the guy’s not real.
October 14, 2014: Took a box of condoms to the checkout clerk and asked where the fitting room was.
You can’t do that? How are you supposed to pick the right size then?
Honey
October 17, 2015, 1:50pm
15
A person doing the tent gag would be taking a huge risk. You do not lure children into a tent.
These were funny though, even if they weren’t true.
I wish it were real, I need a role model.
TBG
October 17, 2015, 11:26pm
17
The only thing awesome here is that such a dick doesn’t really exist. Seriously, this sort of behavior is not acceptable, and shame on those who think it’s cool just because of some grudge they have against Walmart.
bup
October 17, 2015, 11:31pm
18
Yeah, like two of those were funny. If I knew a guy that did any of most of these, I’d hate him.
TBG:
The only thing awesome here is that such a dick doesn’t really exist . Seriously, this sort of behavior is not acceptable, and shame on those who think it’s cool just because of some grudge they have against Walmart.
Bolding mine.
(I agree with your second sentence btw)
I was trying to find an Easter gift for a friend baby and there was a table with musical toy ducks . I winded up one and I didn’t hear anything so I thought it was broken so I winded another , damn broken , I tried all the ducks and they were all broken , then I turned around and saw the store manger standing with his arms across his chest looking very pissed off at me ! Then I realize I all the ducks going at once but I couldn’t hear them ! LOL! I have no idea what the ducks were playing but it had to been a very sound which I can’t hear.
