Who was the Surgeon General who was forced out after suggesting that schools teach masturbation as a means towards cutting down on teen pregnancy and STDs?
Americans must be organizing this event. They’re taunting the Brits, asking them to break an 8.5 hour record at an 8 hour event.
I have been approached for a masturbation pledge. It was at a play party, so there wasn’t really cause to complain.
Maybe this is different, but the one in that case was meant to be either solitary or, um, in small groups. They weren’t renting out the convention centre or anything.
Awww, we’re just jacking them around…
Ah, you must be thinking of Jocelyn “Wasn’t she that masturbation lady?” Elders
Why can’t it be both? 
That was kind of dumb of her.
I mean, when did any teenager ever need to be taught masturbation?
Monkeys can work this shit out!
But you can’t hold down the Brits! They’ll rise to the challenge and overcome every obstacle!
Og, this is just too easy . . . 
I hate to image what the next event there will be. Just as long as it isn’t the British Forensic Association or some sort of black-light art convention they should be ok.
True. But they could be taught not to be ashamed of it. I think it might help also if we let kids look at porn at 14 or 15, rather than 18. Although, of course, they do anyway.
It’s not clear whether you’re only allowed to masturbate yourself, or help out a needy neighbor. And do they serve refreshments, like pan-fried semen?
We are accustomed to playing extra time. Normally followed by a shoot-out.
And I do believe that this sublime use of a Futurama quote has successfully caused Bryan Ekers to win the internet, at least in this particular topic.
Are we sure about this?
I have an acquaintance (a fellow that frequents the same drinking establishment as I) who is well know to conduct primate research at the local university. One evening he was telling me that copulation is learned behavior for primates. This is one of the reasons that when primates are taken from the wild at a young age that it is difficult to get them to breed. In essence they don’t know how to screw. His point was that pornography might well have a function in human society.
So in answer to the OP, is this event vulgarity? Well maybe to my mom, but to a pornographer, just another day at work. A genuine charity event? Yes if it makes the bucks and serves some aspect of the charitable purpose.
To answer the unasked question: Is public masturbation as an informational public exercise a benefit to our society? Maybe.
I think it is. But the Philadelphia police department and the management of Baskin Robbins disagree with me.
Apes and monkeys masturbating in zoo-cages is a common spectacle . . . which, of course, does not mean it cannot be a behavior they learned from watching other monkeys rather than experimenting on their own.
Sick. Just sick. I want to throw up.
Save it for the Vomit-a-thon.
If they want to break the record, which is 8.5 hours, why is the event only scheduled from two to ten? Isn’t that just 8 hours?