In a few weeks I’ll be taking my GRE (in sunny Thailand!) and I’ve been cramming to get ready. In high school I cheated, begged and faked my way through math class, and so I never really learned any of it. And lord knows I haven’t used a bit of it since (take that, “you’ll need this one day” teachers.)
My practice tests in verbal are almost perfect, but math is showing abysmal scores. I’m kind of looking at some nice schools. They just plain aren’t going to let me in with the scores I’ve been getting.
I thought I could do it, now that I am motivated. I mean, high school math should be pretty easy to learn now that I have a good reason and am away from the other pressures of high schools. I figured that with a clear mind, clear motives, and some good books I’d be able to at least get an acceptable score.
No. I’m sitting here in my room, just about in tears over the algebra chapter. I just plain don’t get it. I do the work. I fill up pages with numbers. It all seems to make sense as I am doing it. Well, sometimes I go around in circles, cross-multiplying and factoring until I’m not sure where I came from or where I am going. But most I manage to come up with an answer, and it seems right. I think I used the right logic, the right steps. Alas, my answer is never their answer.
And every problem it’s a different wrong turn. It’s not like there is one thing that is stumping me. I just can’t take a problem and know when I am supposed to factor or use formulas or what. I THINK I know, but I clearly I don’t.
Out of 15 problems today, I got 5 right. 5. Oddly, they were all in the advanced section. But still, 1/3. I’d be lucky to get into community college.
Why can’t I do this? Why is basic math, that any educated person could probably pick up in a few minutes, basically impossible for me? I feel like an idiot. And I’m worried about how this is going to affect my future. And my head hurts every day from trying to study this stuff. Ugh.
Math is still hard.