Today?
Here ya go.
<Hands over a 55-gallon drum of piping hot joe>
How I need a drink, alcoholic of course, after the heavy lectures involving quantum mechanics.
Sorry, no. You have to guess the size from the random words used to describe them.
Due to legal restrictions, I can only offer you this coffee flavored, caffeinated drink product.
-D/a
Do you want pi with that?
Que j’aime à faire apprendre un nombre utile aux sages !
Immortel Archimède, artiste ingénieur,
Qui de ton jugement peut priser la valeur ?
Pour moi, ton problème eut de pareils avantages.
Jadis, mystérieux, un problème bloquait
Tout l’admirable procédé, l’œuvre grandiose
Que Pythagore découvrit aux anciens Grecs.
Ô quadrature! Vieux tourment du philosophe
Insoluble rondeur, trop longtemps vous avez
Défié Pythagore et ses imitateurs.
Comment intégrer l’espace plan circulaire ?
Former un triangle auquel il équivaudra ?
Nouvelle invention: Archimède inscrira
Dedans un hexagone; appréciera son aire
Fonction du rayon. Pas trop ne s’y tiendra:
Dédoublera chaque élément antérieur;
Toujours de l’orbe calculée approchera;
Définira limite; enfin, l’arc, le limiteur
De cet inquiétant cercle, ennemi trop rebelle
Professeur, enseignez son problème avec zèle.
coffee coffee everywhere, but not a drop to drink. Where am I?
///
matt_mcl, just a reminder that our rules state that posts should be in English:
Would you be so kind as to provide a translation?
Thanks,
twickster, MPSIMS moderator
Why sure, Mr…HEEEEEY, WAIDAMINIT! You shouldn’t have a problem finding your own coffee!
I can translate for you:
and it goes on from there. 
Too bad you didn’t post this a few days ago - I just threw away a large can full of coffee. It was this Yuban stuff my mom sent me in a holiday package… I usually buy the higher-end stuff (the kind that comes in bags rather than cans. Peet’s is the brand I usually get). I took a whiff of it and it smelled terrible, but it was coffee, and it was a gift, so I figured I’d at least give it a try.
Soon after it started brewing, I was getting physically nauseous from the horrible stench of it. Without even taking a sip, I poured it down the drain and threw away the can with extreme prejudice. I can’t believe people actually drink that crap! I also never knew I was such a coffee snob.
It’s a mnemonic rhyme for the digits of p. Do you seriously expect him to produce an English translation where the word-for-word letter count is the same? :dubious:
With pie, of course.
Upon a painted ship upon a painted ocean…(blast me, I can’t think of a good coffee metaphor for oceans/paint…the coffee tastes like paint? nah…)
hh
Since it’s getting late, would you prefer decaf?
How I love π! Teach beginners my digits, handy for genii.
Immortal ‘Aρχημήδης, cunning number-guy,
Who in thy judgement will assess π’s extent?
This nut - its cracking - got me immense enjoyment…
- trad. Douglas Hofstadter
Now I, even I, would celebrate
In rhymes unapt the great:
Immortal Syracusan rivaled nevermore
Who, in his wondrous lore,
Passed on before,
Left Men his guidance,
How to circles mensurate.
– As related by Martin Gardner
in one of his books.
I doubt she does. You can still quote the original poem, as long as you provide a translation. It doesn’t have to be a poetic one.
And, in that vein, I’ll give you a Google Translate version for you French speakers to laugh at:
I like to learn a useful number to the wise!
Immortal Archimedes, artist, engineer,
That your decision can snuff the value?
To me, your problem was of such benefits.
Formerly, mysterious, a blocking problem
All the admirable method, the great work
Pythagoras discovered that the ancient Greeks.
O square! Old torment of the philosopher
Insoluble roundness, too long you have
Pythagoras and his followers challenged.
How to integrate space is circular?
Form a triangle which is equivalent?
New Invention: Archimedes will record
In a hexagon; appreciate its range
Based on the radius. It will not do too:
Split each element earlier;
Always calculated the orb will approach;
Define limits and lastly, the arc, the limiter
In this disturbing circle, rebel enemy too
Professor, teach her problem with zeal.
(Even I can laugh, since I know it’s getting some things wrong due to the line breaks.)